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deathtocapslock2006-07-21 12:07 pm
sistermagpie.livejournal.com) wrote in deathtocapslock2006-07-21 12:07 pm
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HBP Chapter Nineteen
*Everyone gathers around Ron’s bedside. The Twins announce they were thinking of buying Zonko’s. Why do I have no trouble imagining the Twins mean they are going to buy Zonko’s whether Zonko wants to sell it or not?
*Seriously, I really want their money focus to go somewhere. Percy the hard-working clerk is a great distraction from the real ambition in the family.
*Not that Fred is so upset he can’t complain about Hogwarts security again cutting into their business. Damn. Just because somebody used their method of getting around security to try and kill someone.
*Harry turns cold at the thought of what he would have done if there wasn’t a bezoar in the room with Slughorn—what with the Potions expert naturally disabled because Harry was there.
*Snape is much more difficult about stuff like that. No heroics for Harry in front of him!
*Hermione’s white-faced because that’s true love for you. Bicker-get upset when the person almost dies-bicker-get upset when someone almost dies.
*Ginny, meanwhile, promotes herself as Harry’s ideal girl by obsessively discussing how Ron might have been poisoned. The kind of thing you’d expect from Hermione in earlier books, before shipping dominated the personality.
*Mind you, this obsessive discussion won’t lead to any sort of investigation on anyone’s part but Harry’s. Yeah, I know one of their own’s been hit this time, but after all, it is only Ron.
*Arthur and Molly have come to the school too, to get the standard parent runaround. If only Hermione had been poisoned they wouldn’t have to answer to her parents at all. "Dear Mr. and Mrs. Muggleborn. According to our records your daughter was beheaded in June of her second year. I’m afraid we can no longer keep her on our rolls. A team of Aurors will arrive at your house on Thursday morning for memory wipes. Please have tea waiting. Sincerely, Albus Dumbledore, Epitome of Goodness."
*Luckily since this is the Weasleys we know they won’t be demanding anything be done. Not like those awful Slytherin parents.
*ROTFL! It’s so wonderful they all start talking about how maybe the poison was meant for Harry.
*Hermione’s crying, btw. For anyone who’s missed this sort of thing so far, this is what we mean by an anvil.
*Ron’s muttering Hermione’s name in his sleep goes beyond anvil. It’s a bag of anvils beating each other with hammers.
*Hagrid’s here. Well, that’s that taken care of. He’ll fix everything. Frankly, I’m surprised he didn’t come running in assuming Harry had been hurt and then being relieved it was Ron!
*Hagrid is upset by Ron’s lying in the Infirmary. Like he’s never seen him lying in the Infirmary before. Guess he didn’t come to visit first year when Ron was the Infirmary with an injury caused by Hagrid. Might have looked suspicious. Remember kids, when an adult tells you to lie for him you must do it, even if you get hurt! Only adults who really love children a lot ask you to keep secrets for them! Mummy and Daddy don’t need to know about pet-the-baby-dragon. That’s our special game!
*Hagrid suggests someone has a grudge against the Gryffindor Quidditch team. Harry, proving he’s a true friend, does not remark that Ron would be the last person to take out if you’re trying to hurt the Gryffindor Quidditch team. He doesn’t even think it, which is genuinely surprising!
*Fred "fairly" suggests Oliver Wood would have poisoned the Slytherin team if he could have gotten away with it. Um. Okay. *revises previous opinion of Oliver Wood*
*Hermione says she thinks there’s a connection between the attacks, and Fred asks how she worked that out. WTF? Two similar murder attempts gone awry in the same boarding school wouldn’t be connected? Even Hogwarts usually schedules only a single murder plot per year.
*Hermione says the murderer is even more dangerous because they don’t care how many people they finish off before they get their victim. I feel the need to point out this is a misdirection. Hermione’s exactly wrong here—the murderer isn’t more dangerous because he doesn’t care who he finishes off, he’s more dangerous because he doesn’t really want to kill anybody, as DD says later. You’re safer with a cold-blooded assassin than a jumpy kid with a gun he wants and doesn’t want to use.
*Molly lovingly thanks Harry for saving Ginny, Arthur and now Ron. Later she’ll thank Harry for somehow always being involved in the reason these people needed saving. A life without danger is a life half-lived! It really was a lucky day when Ron decided to sit in Harry’s compartment that day! (Which if one recalls, he did because he heard that was famous Harry Potter in there!)
*Madam Pomfrey comes in and says there are only six visitors allowed. Hagrid amazingly decides to leave with Harry and Hermione and not hang around the family demanding sympathy for his spider.
*Hagrid reminds everyone that if Dumbledore knew who was behind the necklace and the wine they’d have been caught. It’s not like he’d just watch with interest to see how things played out, right?
*Hagrid reminds us of the real worry here—that the school will close. Just like the Chamber of Secrets. Oh, so not much problem them. The attacks will be covered up and there’s no Lucius Malfoy to pressure anyone. Hurray!
*Hagrid explains that all parents expect a certain number of accidents at Hogwarts because of all the underage Wizards cooped up together. Yeah, when I think of Hogwarts accidents I think of the kids having accidents on each other. I certainly don’t think of Hagrid.
*Hagrid says something stupid and tries to cover with a guilt trip: Do you want him to lose his job after breaking his heart with his not taking CoMC? Harry tells Hagrid to STFU. Okay, he doesn’t use those words, but it’s just as satisfying.
*Snape said Dumbledore took too much for granted and maybe Snape didn’t want to do it anymore. Dumbledore said Snape’s agreed to do it and that’s all there is to it. It seems even Hagrid recognizes a more interesting storyline going on in Slytherin when he sees it!
*And what does Dumbledore have Snape investigating in Slytherin? I mean, are they pretending they don’t know it’s Draco?
*Filch makes a comment about the kids being out of bed, whether Hagrid is with them or not. Hagrid shuts Filch up with a bigoted remark, calling him a sneakin’ Squib. Sorry, did I say bigoted? Of course it’s not bigoted. It’s just being or characteristic of one who believes that the group of people he belongs to based on common circumstances of birth accounts for differences in human character and that his particular group is superior to others.
*It seems nobody knows about Ron yet. It’s Ron, so he hasn’t been missed the entire day.
*Harry realizes Dumbledore must not really be telling the truth about trusting Snape because he lost his temper with him. Um, Harry? Those are two different things. Dumbledore recently lost his temper with you, remember? Kind of like you lose your temper regularly? Doesn’t mean he thinks you’re working for Voldemort.
*Harry thinks maybe Dumbledore did not want Harry to take things into his own hands and do something foolish, so he decides to take things into his own hands and do something foolish. Go Harry go!
*Perhaps Dumbledore doesn’t think it’s right to confide suspicions of his staff to 16-year-olds. Since Harry reasons like much of fandom, he forgets he has no evidence to think Dumbledore has any actual suspicions about Snape to hide from the 16-year-olds. The very lack of evidence will now become evidence!
*McLaggen jumps up from a chair where he’s been waiting…apparently for his cue after Harry finishes his ruminations about Snape.
*Harry sticks his wand back into the belt of his jeans. So first, he’s wearing jeans. Second, how does one put a wand in one’s belt? Do they walk around with a stick down their pants all the time? Somebody really needs to create a holster or something. Isn’t there some reference to Malfoy’s being his the sleeve of his robe or something?
*It turns out news of Ron’s injury is known to at least one person, but he didn’t care enough to spread it. Ron, Katie and Malfoy should start a club for the almost-killed but not interesting enough for gossip.
*Ron can be president of the club, since his poisoning causes even less interest than Katie Bell’s. Been there, done that.
*Everyone’s much more interested in seeing Zach Smith punished for doing the commentary Lee used to do, only biased against Gryffindor instead of for Gryffindor. Wait; wasn’t the kid already squished under the commentary box for that? Guess that didn’t count.
*Harry, however, had never been less interested in Quidditch; he was rapidly becoming obsessed with Draco Malfoy. Just wanted to type that again.
*Harry has started making detours to wherever Draco is, but has not yet found him doing anything out of the ordinary. I hope they play this out in the movie, with Malfoy looking up from the water fountain or another class he has to see Harry skulking, and getting confused. Good comic potential.
*Naturally Harry finds Lavender even more annoying than McClaggen, since Lavender is the one who actually deserves a little respect here. Imagine her thinking somebody should have told her Ron was in the Infirmary!
*Harry tries to get all self-righteous about Lavender calling getting poisoned interesting, which falls really really flat. You can’t make remarks like that and be a Gryffindor. Yes Harry, he’s more interesting now. We all know it. Moving on.
*Btw, that was a subtle indication that Lavender’s interest in Ron is shallow and bad—it is she who likes him more when he’s interesting, where as Hermione likes him for his true self. This is further indicated by the way Lavender says Ron’s good at stuff while Hermione constantly reminds him he’s inadequate.
*Harry runs into Malfoy and his two sulky, resentful girls. Malfoy gets an actual funny line, which one of the girls can’t help but giggle at. This for some reason makes Harry stare at the girl—doesn’t she know nothing Malfoy says to Harry should be funny?—and they leave.
*Harry would really rather follow Malfoy than play Quidditch. Don’t go to the Pitch on my account, Harry. I’d rather follow Malfoy too!
*Apparently the Gryffindor changing rooms are co-ed? I guess a different architect did the changing rooms than did the stairs to the Girl’s dormitory.
*Luna begins her commentary by fawning all over Ginny. Anybody who wants to fly into her commentary stand, or maybe just stick gum in her hair, I’ll look the other way.
*Luna, given a microphone, unsurprisingly succumbs to a frenzy of attention-getting behavior, punctuated by passive-aggressive digs at Zach Smith, since Ginny doesn’t like him.
* McClaggen smacks an iron ball into Harry’s head, which is not fatal at all, funny when imitated by Ginny, serious when imitated by Dean, and releases us from having to read about another whole Quidditch match. Go McClaggen!
*Harry wakes up later in the Infirmary and finds out about the rest of the game from Ron, which went the way we would all imagine: They lost, but Harry was unconscious so it wasn’t his fault. Ginny scored lots of goals and was Unconscious!Harry’s ideal girl, even when he was too unconscious to know it. Luna tried desperately to wrench attention to herself even while Harry was carted off. Zach Smith went up to Luna after the match and told her she only worked so hard at being weird because she was actually dull as dishwater and made her cry.
*Ron says Harry’s getting a bit obsessed with Malfoy. Just wanted to type that one too.
*Harry fleetingly wishes he had a full force of Aurors at his command. The Chosen’s Chosen—coming this fall on ABC.
*He does consider setting something up with the DA, which he’s abandoned but should still be ready to do his bidding should he ask. Hee! Imagine Ernie MacMillan trying to tail someone. Even better imagine NA!Ernie trying to tail someone.
*Harry suddenly realizes the answer to all his problems—why, he’s the only student at Hogwarts who has his own slave in residence! How could he have forgotten?
*Funny that Harry is thinking about a visit from Dobby and that leads him to remember he’s got…Kreacher. Why not call Dobby, who’s as close to a slave as one can get without the ownership papers? Well, I’m not complaining. I’d rather have Kreacher any day!
*Apparently geriatric Kreacher said something awful about Harry and Dobby attacked him. Can house elves get Sorted? Because someone who knocks out all the teeth of grumpy senior citizens really ought to be earning points for his House!
*Harry hexes Peeves with one of the Prince’s spells. Takes to it like a duck to water, that Harry!
*Dobby starts crying, because it’s upsetting to have punched out an old man’s teeth. How is it Kreacher manages to have more dignity than Dobby when he’s a bigoted slave with no teeth wearing nothing but a string?
*I’d just like to point out that nowhere in this scene does Harry flinch at ordering around a slave. Even when Dobby offers to freely help him instead he decides to use them both.
*Harry asks the elves to tail Draco 24/7. Damn, where’s Colin when you need him? They could take pictures for Harry to…look at later. Study for investigative purposes in bed at night.
*Harry foresees a great danger in Kreacher betraying him and acts to prevent it. Oh, so he’s going to put a hex on Kreacher that will make him break out in acne if he squeals to Malfoy without telling him he’s doing that?
*I just had a brief daydream of Malfoy, P.I. solving mysteries with Kreacher as his servant.
*Just stick to Malfoy like a couple of plasters, Harry says. Or like a skin tight pair of trousers that mould themselves to his sculpted buttocks, revealing a tantalizing hardness when he…err, just follow him around. For investigative purposes. Off you go then. Harry’s going to bed now.
Hero’s Death Battle Exemption
CHOSEN ONE KILLED WHEN LARGE TEENAGED BOY WHACKS IRON BALL INTO SKULL
just doesn’t have the right punch for an ending.
IITS
Oh my god, our friend’s been poisoned! I’m sure now people will be interested in finding out more about this murder plot. First we ought to find out where the wine came from and when it was bought and ask about…oooh, Quidditch!
Idiot Picture
You have to wonder about that added security when two blatant murder attempts are indistinguishable from normal school life at Hogwarts.
Idiot World
What’s that Hagrid? What’s that boy? You overheard an important conversation between the head of the war effort and his number one spy? And you blabbed it to a bunch of teenagers?
Informed Attributes
Malfoy hasn’t had much chance to call people Mudbloods this year, so this is a good time to remind ourselves he’s the representative of discrimination. Don’t want anyone to get confused by our heroic slaveowner and his friend calling that guy a sneakin’ Squib.
POV Shots
It’s not a Quidditch injury if we’re not in Harry’s pov!
The Stealth Monster Rule
Heeeeere’s McLaggen!
Final score: 7
elanor
(Anonymous) 2006-07-21 05:47 pm (UTC)(link)She promotes herself as Harry’s ideal girl even more by getting , accidentally of course, the idea that the poisoner can be after D..
Got impatient with Hermione-the-plot-robot in OoTF? Imagine book 7: "HP & the Quartet's Fight With V." with Ginny-all-knowing-Sue as the next generation. Only she is a brilliant Seeker & The Chosen One's bride too, thus even cooler than Hermione could ever be.
> *Hagrid suggests someone has a grudge against the Gryffindor Quidditch team.
Go Hagrid! I actually read a great humor fic (in Russian) where all book characters come to the same conclusion in the end.
> *Arthur and Molly have come to the school too, to get the standard parent runaround.
Interesting what exactly D. told Ron's parents. I am sure he didn't even consider telling the truth to 2 OoTF members, risking their lives to fight V. (Arthur bitten by a snake last year, Molly's brothers killed), whose son almost got murdered by a DE, permitted to run free at D.'s school.
In fact, keeping the enemy close seems like an old tradition with D.(except V.).
> *Harry turns cold at the thought of what he would have done if there wasn’t a bezoar in the room with Slughorn—what with the Potions expert naturally disabled because Harry was there.
Slughorn, a Potions expert & "an extremely able wizard" according to D., becomes paralysed by shock while facing danger and can not even use MAGIC to bring Ron to the hospital wing without Madam Pomfrey's & McGonagall's help. We get another demonstration that without the infamous Griffindor courage the world would crumble. A sole Slytherin not described as a coward is Snape, which gives me tiny hope for a more interesting scenario in book 7 than: "he has been evil since Harry's first lesson, remember?".
>*Hermione’s white-faced because that’s true love for you. Bicker-get upset when the person almost dies-bicker-get upset when someone almost dies.
To be fare I will note that nearly losing Ron apparently made Hermione realize that they are in the middle of wizard's equivalent to World War 3 (she starts treating Ron as usual when he wakes up without ANY reference from either side to the fall-out, which continued weeks).
> *Fred "fairly" suggests Oliver Wood would have poisoned the Slytherin team if he could have gotten away with it. Um. Okay. *revises previous opinion of Oliver Wood*
Yes, following in Ginny&Fred&George's footsteps Wood is another Griffindor willing to send people to the hospital wing for petty & insignificant things. This house becomes more attractive with every minute.
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The twins are a case example of 'will to power'. Thank heavens that they gear those ambitions to joke items and not political ambitions. But then again why think small?
Fred "fairly" suggests Oliver Wood would have poisoned the Slytherin team if he could have gotten away with it. Um. Okay. *revises previous opinion of Oliver Wood*
In the next book Wood will be accused of some magical equivalent of steroid abuse. Heyyyyyyyy...Victor Krum is going to be in book 7. Do you think it ties in? Maybe Riddle isn't trying to take over the WW. Instead he has been trying to illegally influence UK Quidditch team scores by flooding the market with magical muscle enhancers. Yeah! Works for me. Harry is his chosen one!
Naturally Harry finds Lavender even more annoying than McClaggen, since Lavender is the one who actually deserves a little respect here. Imagine her thinking somebody should have told her Ron was in the Infirmary!
She is the only character who respects Ron. Naturally she deserves to be dumped and earn everyone's enmity. She should draw blood with the next boyfriend. Then he will be too afraid to dump her.
Luna begins her commentary by fawning all over Ginny. Anybody who wants to fly into her commentary stand, or maybe just stick gum in her hair, I’ll look the other way.
Its all about the Ideal Ginbot. Strange that Luna should care, especially she could care less what people thought of her in OOTP.
Apparently geriatric Kreacher said something awful about Harry and Dobby attacked him. Can house elves get Sorted? Because someone who knocks out all the teeth of grumpy senior citizens really ought to be earning points for his House!
The elderly, addled and infirm population should be taught their place! Especially if they are evil.
I just had a brief daydream of Malfoy, P.I. solving mysteries with Kreacher as his servant
I can see it done in the style of Miami Vice.
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If you got to be elderly, it's because you were too cowardly to die in battle!
Heyyyyyyyy...Victor Krum is going to be in book 7.
RLY?
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If you got to be elderly, it's because you were too cowardly to die in battle!
Ah, of course! How dare the elderly live past their prime (burdening loved ones and not-so-loved ones) instead of going out in a blaze of glory. Well, Kreacher offered his head for display but Harry et. al. wouldn't do it. We all get whats coming to us.
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Too much exposure to Our Heroes in the last book corrupted her, just as it has corrupted Neville.
You know, I actually quite pity nerdy little kids who try to read and enjoy this series sometimes?
elanor: D's real plan, house elves & JKR's consistent(!) characterization
(Anonymous) 2006-07-21 08:10 pm (UTC)(link)And apparently neither does D.. I am curious whether D. would feel guilty if f.e. Slughorn drank the mead alone & died or Katie got killed by the neclace? It really seems as if he would do smth only if he would be poisoned/hurt himself (or Harry may be).
D's explanation that he didn't dare approach Draco before, in case V. used Legilimency against him is unconvincing & disturbing since:
1) In one of the ending chapters D. claims to be able to "hide you (Draco) more completely than you can possibly imagine". He could do it now too with or without Draco's agreement (in case he didn't want to protect also his criminal parents & only save Draco's life).
2) Didn't Snape tell D. that Draco got Occlumency lessons from his aunt? (Don't think it would help against V. , specially since he would be aware of it's use like Snape was, but decided to note it anyway).
3) Are lives of other people he endangered worth less than Draco's ?
The only logical explanation is that D. didn't want V. to know about D's knowledge of his plan & attempt to kill D in more effective (and possibly successful) way , thus making D's life / Horcruxes' search more difficult .
Interesting how Hermione would react if she knew that D. knows exactly who is behind the attacks and chooses to do nothing for convenience's sake.
During OoTF re-read sistermagpie wondered what Hermione would do if her authority figure let her down [suggesting fanatical rage & not trusting anybody anymore]. Sadly, in this book she didn't notice this aspect at all [probably due to D's death & Horxuses' revelation].
*Apparently geriatric Kreacher said something awful about Harry and Dobby attacked him.
Interesting how many fights they have already had since the beginning of the year. Since it can not realistically be the first one, it's a miracle Kreacher had some teeth left. D was right when he told "the other house-elves could keep an eye on him". Apparently not only on his deeds, as I understood this comment then, but on his thoughts too [reminded me a bit of Orwell's "1984"].
*---Dobby starts crying, because it’s upsetting to have punched out an old man’s teeth.
--And then Hermione attacks Ron with the birds and they claw at his flesh …and—oh noes! Hermione is crying! See, it IS upsetting to hurt other people when they deserve it!
--Now that Ginny’s completely emasculated Ron, she gets close to tears. Um, again, wtf? He’s the one who’s being humiliated. …Why is she crying? I didn’t realize it was so upsetting making other people look stupid.
Hee!!! JKR is pretty consistent in this aspect of our good guy's characterization [ I suspect it's unconscious, though] . They are so [-p-s-y-c-h-o-] compassionate !
* What does ROTFL! mean?
Re: elanor: D's real plan, house elves & JKR's consistent(!) characterization
LOL. I can only fanwank the explanation that Katie's of less practical value to the war effort than Malfoy, as far as we know (*wheeze* Sacrifices have to made in war-time, blah blah) and if Slughorn had drunk the mead by himself, it'd totally serve him right for being fat and greedy?
I'm sure Dumbledore would have spared them a single tear, though!
ROTFL = Rolling on the Floor Laughing.
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Ginny's sort of defending Slughorn here (and getting to the real heart of the mystery by guessing that the poison must be meant for Dumbledore.) Anyone who's identified her as the cool kids couldn't mean any harm! (Solving the would-be murderer will be easy - it's the guy who didn't think there was anything special about her!)
I'm just glad someone pointed out that Slughorn's fat, and thus only has a minor part to play in this dramatic plot.
Sorry, did I say bigoted? Of course it’s not bigoted.
If someone's ever been bigoted towards you (even if it's not the person you're arguing with), you have legal permission, nay, a responsibility to be bigoted back! Otherwise you'd be too perfect, and not human. Unlike if you're bigoted towards bigoted people who have been the victim of bigotry! Then you're not human because you're evil! It's a fine line.
Plus Filch was obnoxious first. Like how Hermione was obnoxious to Malfoy about getting on the team in CoS, so it was okay for him to call her a Mudblood! Oh, no, wait, I've become confused.
Wait; wasn’t the kid already squished under the commentary box for that?
Doesn't this remind you of OotP, where Harry's all 'Anything that makes Malfoy happy after the disastrously unsuccessful Quidditch match where we beat his team and then him would be lovely. I haven't felt joy in someone's misery for nigh on a week!'
Harry tries to get all self-righteous about Lavender calling getting poisoned interesting, which falls really really flat.
It could be read her that she's implying that Hermione found Ron more interesting poisoned. Although obviously that isn't what Rowling means, since Harry doesn't see it that way. Still, I'm happy in my own little world, here.
Imagine her thinking somebody should have told her Ron was in the Infirmary!
Love how she's apparently seeing the relationship as 'serious'. (As Cho was apparently supposed to in the OOTP draft. Girls, huh? You ask them out and it's
almost like they think you want to be around themthey're dreaming of their wedding day.) It'll be that much funnier to see her fall flat on her face and get dumped now!Also she cares deeply about her dress robes, having a vagina.
Snape is much more difficult about stuff like that. No heroics for Harry in front of him!
Later he will go cold thinking about what would have happened to Malfoy if Snape hadn't been there post-Sectumsempra. Except not.
Fred "fairly" suggests Oliver Wood would have poisoned the Slytherin team if he could have gotten away with it. Um. Okay. *revises previous opinion of Oliver Wood*
And Fred, for being fair! Where's the guy who could hospitalise someone for a year and not feel bad over it? I hope running his own business hasn't forced him to become one of those pinko commies. Next thing you know, he'll be calling them curses instead of counter-curses.
I hope they play this out in the movie, with Malfoy looking up from the water fountain or another class he has to see Harry skulking, and getting confused. Good comic potential.
You realise you're going to be watching it with me, right? 2008, baby!
Yes Harry, he’s more interesting now. We all know it. Moving on.
Lucky he averted the subject to Lavender being shallow from Ron and Hermione's friendship, and Lavender's valid comment that if they're such BFFs, wtf is with all the sulking because he's dating? (Granted, he was a bitch in GOF. Still, I think we need Ron to burst into tears and ask Hermione why she hasn't asked him out, and how she's ruined everything by spoiling his joy in the girl he's dating to get her attention for a true parallel.) Shit or get off the pot, R/Hr!
no subject
(Anonymous) 2006-07-21 10:48 pm (UTC)(link)Snape has some kind of uncanny resistance to Harry's competence-damper field, thus robbing Harry of the chance to look ridiculously good at his expense. It's part of what makes him so petty and hateful.
Luckily since this is the Weasleys we know they won’t be demanding anything be done.
The Weasleys, except Percy, are all about loyalty. If they made a fuss it would be tantamount to questioning Beloved Leader.
Fred "fairly" suggests Oliver Wood would have poisoned the Slytherin team if he could have gotten away with it. Um. Okay. *revises previous opinion of Oliver Wood*
Didn't Wood say in PoA he didn't care if Harry fell off his broom provided he caught the Snitch first? If that's the extent of his concern for his own team, the Slytherins probably did have a lucky escape.
Everyone’s much more interested in seeing Zach Smith punished for doing the commentary Lee used to do, only biased against Gryffindor instead of for Gryffindor.
Seriously, what's going on with Smith? He questions Harry and gets threatened, gets hexed by Ginny, does anti-Gryff commentary and gets flattened by Ginny, and somehow it seems like all this adds up to more and more proof that he's a bad guy. In a snarky but ineffectual, slightly comic way. Are we seeing "Dr. Zachary Smith: The Early Years", or what?
Funny that Harry is thinking about a visit from Dobby and that leads him to remember he’s got…Kreacher. Why not call Dobby, who’s as close to a slave as one can get without the ownership papers?
Not to mention that Kreacher's level of cooperation is such that he'll do his utmost to disobey Harry, and incidentally has already helped Harry's enemies kill...whatshisface. Some guy he was close to in the last book, whatever.
-L
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*dies*
Malfoy hasn’t had much chance to call people Mudbloods this year, so this is a good time to remind ourselves he’s the representative of discrimination. Don’t want anyone to get confused by our heroic slaveowner and his friend calling that guy a sneakin’ Squib.
*dies again*
I kind of like Filch. I like grouchy characters--and besides, if you were in his shoes, wouldn't you hate all the students too?
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Hee! You know, that's interesting. Luna's such a caricature that you almost have to think she's trying to be, because she doesn't know how else to get attention.
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I definitely got the impression that they've been putting Zonko out of business. It made me pine for all the pre-HBP fic with them working for Zonko, since they loved his store so much.
Even better imagine NA!Ernie trying to tail someone.
This image is going to stay with me forever. XD
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Would you like a slice of wordpie? Every time someone mentions how JKR is totally one of the geek crowd, I want to laugh. With the way she likes to pretend that Harry&Co are the downtrodden losers of Hogwarts (even with all their hangers-on)? And the way the actual loser kids worship them in spite of the way that group wavers between ignoring them and outright insulting them? No chance! I'm going to hazard a guess that JKR was an average student who maybe felt like she was part of the unpopular crowd...based only on her treatment of the popular/unpopular issue in the books, of course.
Or maybe I'm overthinking the Stu-ifying nature of HBP. Who knows.
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Oh, I think it's present in all the books (like in CoS, where the Hufflepuffs that Harry's never exchanged more than two words with are all 'But he seems so nice!')
I think that Rowling just doesn't give a lot of characters very much thought. So in her eyes, Harry/Ginny/Hermione/whoever is nice, so of course all other characters think so, even if the other characters have no reason to, having not been exposed to their personalities like the reader or lead characters have been.
She also seems to have a totally schizophrenic attitude towards popularity. So one hand, her characters have to be victims so we can sympathise with them, and she'll talk about how they're 'bullied', or there'll be lines about what misfits they are; and she'll give the impression that popularity isn't necessarily something that comes from being particularly nice - the Marauders are loved by all for being stereotypically 'successful': goodlooking, clever, confident, athletic; even though they can also be cruel. (Or the Twins *crosses fingers*)
But then she can't seem to stop herself from 'rewarding' them for being in her eyes, such great people, so at the same time, there'll be lines in PS about how Harry's one of the most popular boys in his year already (arguably this could be another example similiar to the Marauders - no-one really knows Harry well yet, but he's 'arrived' because he's in the 'best' house, is athletic, famous and rich. But I think with Harry, the narrative tries to give a stronger impression that it's because of his personality: like the afore-mentioned COS line.) or that interview where JKR's directly making the link between being popular (especially in terms of being sexually attractive to men) and being a good person.
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SERIOUSLY THE WAY FILCH GETS TREATED HAS TO BE DEALT WITH IT HAS TO BE. Surely, after Harry actually hexing him, it has to be. On the other hand, sometimes when people are unpleasant it doesn't matter how helpless they are, what is important is to crush them! Like when that enormous clawed monster leaped on a chattering thirteen year old boy.
No, hang on, I've gone wrong somewhere. I really do have faith in JKR on this point. I do. Filch will be avenged!
Isn't Cormac's name McLaggen, though? I could be quite wrong, I must check HBP. O God, I hope they have the stalking in the movie. And I hope they play the song 'One way or the other...'
I still can't believe Ron, at least, did not say 'Malfoy and a couple of girls sneaking off to the empty castle? Gee, Harry, I wonder what could be going on.' Mike Smith and I can't have been the only ones to make some (as it turned out, rather terrifying) assumptions.
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It's a pretty sad day when heterosexuality doesn't seem to be second nature even to Ron. And then people wonder why fangirls turn the whole school into a giant slash orgy.
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This is kinda weird for me. I mean, I get the humour that the macho Crabbe and Goyle are little girls, and naturally in the Potterverse, there could be no worse punishment than having a vagina for the day, but man! Doesn't it sound kinda fun to try Polyjuice, let alone be another gender? Can't say I've ever wanted to be a man, but if I was offered an hour of it, why not?
Go McClaggen!
Unbelievably, McLaggen also gets to tell off Ginny. WTF, no Bat Bogey Hex? What a shame, Ginny's let the patriarchy get her down. (Seriously, he disses Ginny, he calls Harry on his hypocrisy, he dares date Hermione and not ask her about herself, GRYFFINDOR LOST A MATCH?! How does the book not end with this man's
hilariousbrutal anal rape or similiar?)Harry would really rather follow Malfoy than play Quidditch. Don’t go to the Pitch on my account, Harry. I’d rather follow Malfoy too!
*sigh*
I kinda love how Ginny's all 'Why does it matter who Malfoy's with?', though. (And the innocence of Harry - wow, Malfoy's hanging out with two chicks? WHY? There are so many strapping lads about!) You can just see their marriage ending like this.
http://www.skyehawke.com/archive/story.php?no=302
They lost, but Harry was unconscious so it wasn’t his fault.
Even though Harry's uninterested in Quidditch now, didn't practice for an entire year last book, and doesn't even have to get a personal victory since Malfoy's not playing; we still can't have the team lose (WTF, Ginny couldn't win for the entire team? She's slacking off this chapter!) without yet another Harry-is-knocked-unconscious. I guess the Hufflepuffs without Cedric and with the influence of the evil Zach have gone wild - we don't even hear them protesting their win and suggesting a re-match!
Can house elves get Sorted? Because someone who knocks out all the teeth of grumpy senior citizens really ought to be earning points for his House!
I could have sworn 'Shut (your) mouth or I'll shut it for you' has been one of the Twin's or Harry's lines. 'Don't insult (so and so) before me' is also like Hagrid's, pre-
violent freakouttouching display of loyalty in GoF.Naturally Kreacher's only insisting on the right to speak, whereas Dobby is the first to lay down the rules of 'Say something I don't like and I'll be forced to give you a beatdown.'
Hermione’s crying, btw. For anyone who’s missed this sort of thing so far, this is what we mean by an anvil.
Is she crying harder than when she attacked Ron, I wonder?
My heart bleeds. (To be fair, I imagine the H/Hr shippers would point out that Hermione's cried over both boys. For a girl in a story where bereaved teenage girls are despicable whiners, she really gets away with quite a bit of sobbing.)
Ron’s muttering Hermione’s name in his sleep goes beyond anvil. It’s a bag of anvils beating each other with hammers.
R/Hr shippers probably thank their lucky stars every day that their ship got dealt with in the same book as the chest monster. Despite the canary attack, the ‘sexual experience makes you worthy, use other people like tissues!’ and the heavy-handed fudging around (don’t they end Book Six…um, pretty much in the place they started in?) it automatically looks like artistry in comparison.
Molly lovingly thanks Harry for saving Ginny, Arthur and now Ron. Later she’ll thank Harry for somehow always being involved in the reason these people needed saving.
I’m surprised we don’t get an eyeroll from Ginny over this reference to her old personality. I guess she knows her place, though.
It’s really romantic that the Weasleys feel indebted to the guy who’s going to end up with their daughter, though. (I feel the need to bait wank and say this reminds me of Nicole’s family’s attitude to OJ.) Nice healthy foundation for a relationship when the guy – and naturally it’s a guy! Can’t be a damsel in distress without a prince to rescue you! Note how this applies right down to GoF where the only girl playing the ‘rescuer’ rather than ‘victim’ role has to be removed. – can throw in your face that you and your loved one’s owe him your lives. (If he remembers.)
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I would be peeing on stuff non-stop. Off bridges, on trees, on fires. Heck I would drive to someplace cold just to write my name in the snow.
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Oh, for the chance to try drip dry!
Of course, if you shake it more than three times, you're playing with it.
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LOL. Harry's going cold thinking 'What if someone else had gotten to be the hero?'
Only adults who really love children a lot ask you to keep secrets for them!
Hey, even adults who are purposefully harming you for the fun of it shouldn't be told on! That makes you a coward.
Harry foresees a great danger in Kreacher betraying him and acts to prevent it. Oh, so he’s going to put a hex on Kreacher that will make him break out in acne if he squeals to Malfoy?
LOL. Doesn't Maya get around this, with him dropping objects purposefully for Draco?
Zach Smith went up to Luna and told her she only worked so hard at being weird because she was actually dull as dishwater and made her cry.
You're reminding me of American Beauty.
Harry hexes Peeves with one of the Prince’s spells. Takes to it like a duck to water, that Harry!
I love him and Ron discussing how Harry should curse McLaggen (doesn't Harry consider the Sectumsempra for him later on?) since he's too big to take in a fair fight.
McClaggen jumps up from a chair where he’s been waiting…apparently for his cue.
And 'disregarding Harry's wand', too. Is this a sign of what an oaf McLaggen is? (Um, maybe he's sane and is presuming Harry isn't going to attack him for being in his own dormitory at night?)
Btw, that was a subtle indication that Lavender’s interest in Ron is shallow and bad - it is she who likes him more when he’s interesting, where as Hermione likes him for his true self.
If you didn’t instantly realise at the age of 11 that you wanted to marry someone, then you shouldn’t be together at all. This goes for Dean/Ginny and Cho/Harry, too, of course. (And thankfully Lily/James and Arthur/Molly met at school, too.)
Frankly, I’m surprised he didn’t come running in assuming Harry had been hurt and then being relieved it was Ron!
I'm still laughing over his instant reaction to a student nearly dying: 'Not one of yeh friends is it, Harry?' Hagrid's got his priorities straight.
Apparently the Gryffindor changing rooms are co-ed?
I think you've caught another flint. How could the boys share with the girls? Everyone would be overcome with the sight of Ginny's unfettered bosom!
Perhaps Dumbledore doesn’t think it’s right to confide suspicions of his staff to 16-year-olds. Since Harry reasons like much of fandom, he forgets he has no evidence to think Dumbledore has any actual suspicions about Snape to hide from the 16-year-olds.
Not to mention, Harry appears to be considering himself as a normal 16 year old here, rather than that he should automatically be privy to any information Dumbledore has on anyone, as well as the authority on who deserves to teach at all. (And the head injury is later, so I can’t even fanwank a reason why!)
It’s not a Quidditch injury if we’re not in Harry’s pov!
I love the little emo flashbacks of all Harry's dreadful injuries thanks to Quidditch.
Where is Ron's Head?
This makes me wonder: Why didn't Ron move Ginny over from chaser to seeker for the match? They'd have been down one chaser, but that seems a lot better than having no seeker, since the seeker can score 150 points by catching the snitch.
Ron! You're the strategy expert! I can't stand Quidditch and even I know that Ginny can do anything!
Re: Where is Ron's Head?