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deathtocapslock2007-05-01 08:40 pm
kaskait.livejournal.com) wrote in deathtocapslock2007-05-01 08:40 pm
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POA - Chapter 17
Cat, Rat and Dog
*Oh No! Buckbeak has been executed and Harry's mind is blank with shock.
*Well he has an excuse for at least one incident in the book. No other excuses for the blankness so far. Maybe its the upcoming sunlit days.
*Hermione is outraged at the miscarriage of justice! But will have no qualms in the future when her actions are out of proportion to the problem at hand.
*Scabbers is going insane and bites Ron. Crookshanks is in the area and is sure to reveal the invisibility cloaked Trio to Fudge.
*Okay, I'm calling out the Invisibility Cloak. It has been nothing but an easy out for the author since its appearance in the first book. Do you have a lead Hero whose mind is filled with blankness and really isn't a self-starter? What do you do? Give him an Invisibility Cloak, of course! Then he can stumble around the plot and hear things he wouldn't normally hear because he is a blank slate. Literally.
*Scabbers jumps away, Crookshank in pursuit and a hapless Ron tries to stop the impending raticide.
*But Wait! A huge, black dog appears and drags Ron away.
*I guess the Author couldn't stand to put Hermione in the distress role. That special, sunlit role must be filled by GinnyJoSue at ALL times. If not her, any other Weasely will do. Ron is now her proxy. I guess, if the Trio actually considered GinnyJoSue a true and equal Friend. Which they Don't.
*"Go, Away Ginny," said Ron
*The kids, cat, rat and dog have ended up under the whomping willow. Before the kids can get suitably injured, Crookshanks turns the tree off.
*oooooooh, Felis Ex Machina in action. I can't wait to see what Crookshanks uncovers in the last book. Maybe Arnold is Tom Riddle in disguise and Crookshanks knew it! Yes, yes, yes, when Moldie wasn't watching Draco try to KILL DUMBLEDORE, he spent his nights shoving his tongue up GinnyJoSue's nose and eating her snot. It can't get anymore evil than that. *nods*
*Pink pygmy puffs are the new DE symbols.
*The Harry and Hermione show follow Crookshanks into a tunnel under the willow tree. Thereby proving that Ron's true role is to be just a love interest. The question of who will win Ron's heart will be decided in book 7. I'm betting on Harry.
*They are in the Shrieking Shack. The most dreaded shack in the whole ww. Which has nothing to do with the Muggle hit song "Love Shack". This shack just proves that the WW has no long term memory skills as a populace. The Shack didn't screech until just about 20 odd years ago and probably just stood there as a derelict building before. Does the WW rationalize and remember this fact? No. The Shack screeched so it is haunted.
*Then again why am I surprised? This is a world that is without a proper education system after the age of 11. Thank heavens those arrogant muggles taught those wonderful, wizarding kids how to read before they are pulled from the school and sent to some strange parochial educational sect. Is Rowling even aware of the irony that her Hogwarts school system is a little reminiscent of the Fundies ideas about schooling?
*Harry and Hermione burst into the bedroom of the Shrieking Shack which contains a huge four poster bed. Ummm. I think I'm going to leave this image alone.
*No, I can't. Maybe there was a lot of shrieking going on before 20 years ago. Lurrrrve Shack!
*Ron tries to warn the Dynamic Duo about the cadaverous Black sneaking up on them. But a quick getaway isn't in the plot mechanics at this point.
*Ron willingly sacrifices himself in deed. However in the movie, that will be Hermione and Ron will just sit there and wear his terrorized face. Nice.
*Oh Wow, I forgot this part, Harry actually punches Sirius in the head. That must be his power of love shining thru.
*Sirius grabs Harry by the throat but Hermione gives him a violent kick. Ron grabs Sirius' wand. However Crookshanks sacrifices himself for Sirius.
*Harry hesitates giving Lupin a chance to make his entrance. Timing is everything.
*The trio is shocked to see Lupin hugging Black. And a ship has sailed!
*Hermione really freaks out over Lupin's affectionate embrace of Sirius. Thereby launching another ship.
*Hermione outs Lupin.
*Ron, displaying his non-bigot, pure-blood background, tells a werewolf, cootie filled Lupin to stay away from him.
*Lupin is very impressed by Hermione's investigation skills. He really did call her the "cleverest witch of her age", but it is unclear if he added that pedo-ish vibe that is evident in the film.
*Lupin is one cool, droll and strange customer. Do you know what he needs? A pink haired, sobby woman who creates tantrums in sick rooms! Yeah!
*Lupin tells Harry that he saw all in the Marauder's Map and that he helped create it. Which is just another example of Harry blankness. The map is a demonstrable example of a huge security hole in Hogwarts defenses yet Harry lends it out to every Tom who asks.
*He demands that Ron give up Scabbers. Ron refuses, of course.
*Sirius makes a dramatic reveal, Scabbers is the Animagus Peter Pettigrew! Dum de Dum.
*Oh No! Buckbeak has been executed and Harry's mind is blank with shock.
*Well he has an excuse for at least one incident in the book. No other excuses for the blankness so far. Maybe its the upcoming sunlit days.
*Hermione is outraged at the miscarriage of justice! But will have no qualms in the future when her actions are out of proportion to the problem at hand.
*Scabbers is going insane and bites Ron. Crookshanks is in the area and is sure to reveal the invisibility cloaked Trio to Fudge.
*Okay, I'm calling out the Invisibility Cloak. It has been nothing but an easy out for the author since its appearance in the first book. Do you have a lead Hero whose mind is filled with blankness and really isn't a self-starter? What do you do? Give him an Invisibility Cloak, of course! Then he can stumble around the plot and hear things he wouldn't normally hear because he is a blank slate. Literally.
*Scabbers jumps away, Crookshank in pursuit and a hapless Ron tries to stop the impending raticide.
*But Wait! A huge, black dog appears and drags Ron away.
*I guess the Author couldn't stand to put Hermione in the distress role. That special, sunlit role must be filled by GinnyJoSue at ALL times. If not her, any other Weasely will do. Ron is now her proxy. I guess, if the Trio actually considered GinnyJoSue a true and equal Friend. Which they Don't.
*"Go, Away Ginny," said Ron
*The kids, cat, rat and dog have ended up under the whomping willow. Before the kids can get suitably injured, Crookshanks turns the tree off.
*oooooooh, Felis Ex Machina in action. I can't wait to see what Crookshanks uncovers in the last book. Maybe Arnold is Tom Riddle in disguise and Crookshanks knew it! Yes, yes, yes, when Moldie wasn't watching Draco try to KILL DUMBLEDORE, he spent his nights shoving his tongue up GinnyJoSue's nose and eating her snot. It can't get anymore evil than that. *nods*
*Pink pygmy puffs are the new DE symbols.
*The Harry and Hermione show follow Crookshanks into a tunnel under the willow tree. Thereby proving that Ron's true role is to be just a love interest. The question of who will win Ron's heart will be decided in book 7. I'm betting on Harry.
*They are in the Shrieking Shack. The most dreaded shack in the whole ww. Which has nothing to do with the Muggle hit song "Love Shack". This shack just proves that the WW has no long term memory skills as a populace. The Shack didn't screech until just about 20 odd years ago and probably just stood there as a derelict building before. Does the WW rationalize and remember this fact? No. The Shack screeched so it is haunted.
*Then again why am I surprised? This is a world that is without a proper education system after the age of 11. Thank heavens those arrogant muggles taught those wonderful, wizarding kids how to read before they are pulled from the school and sent to some strange parochial educational sect. Is Rowling even aware of the irony that her Hogwarts school system is a little reminiscent of the Fundies ideas about schooling?
*Harry and Hermione burst into the bedroom of the Shrieking Shack which contains a huge four poster bed. Ummm. I think I'm going to leave this image alone.
*No, I can't. Maybe there was a lot of shrieking going on before 20 years ago. Lurrrrve Shack!
*Ron tries to warn the Dynamic Duo about the cadaverous Black sneaking up on them. But a quick getaway isn't in the plot mechanics at this point.
*Ron willingly sacrifices himself in deed. However in the movie, that will be Hermione and Ron will just sit there and wear his terrorized face. Nice.
*Oh Wow, I forgot this part, Harry actually punches Sirius in the head. That must be his power of love shining thru.
*Sirius grabs Harry by the throat but Hermione gives him a violent kick. Ron grabs Sirius' wand. However Crookshanks sacrifices himself for Sirius.
*Harry hesitates giving Lupin a chance to make his entrance. Timing is everything.
*The trio is shocked to see Lupin hugging Black. And a ship has sailed!
*Hermione really freaks out over Lupin's affectionate embrace of Sirius. Thereby launching another ship.
*Hermione outs Lupin.
*Ron, displaying his non-bigot, pure-blood background, tells a werewolf, cootie filled Lupin to stay away from him.
*Lupin is very impressed by Hermione's investigation skills. He really did call her the "cleverest witch of her age", but it is unclear if he added that pedo-ish vibe that is evident in the film.
*Lupin is one cool, droll and strange customer. Do you know what he needs? A pink haired, sobby woman who creates tantrums in sick rooms! Yeah!
*Lupin tells Harry that he saw all in the Marauder's Map and that he helped create it. Which is just another example of Harry blankness. The map is a demonstrable example of a huge security hole in Hogwarts defenses yet Harry lends it out to every Tom who asks.
*He demands that Ron give up Scabbers. Ron refuses, of course.
*Sirius makes a dramatic reveal, Scabbers is the Animagus Peter Pettigrew! Dum de Dum.
no subject
no subject
Ah, sweeter words I have never read.
I would pay double the RRP for TDH if Ron actually told her to 'Go shove broken glass up your arse.'
Triple if she actually did it.
Lupin tells Harry that he saw all in the Marauder's Map and that he helped create it. Which is just another example of Harry blankness. The map is a demonstrable example of a huge security hole in Hogwarts defenses yet Harry lends it out to every Tom who asks.
I'm checking ebay for it right now.
no subject
Combine this with Ginny's Bat Bogey Hex, and it's clear that everyone who heard the Prophecy misunderstood it.
"And he shall have power the Dark Lord knows: snot."
BTW, this entry isn't tagged as belonging to PoA chapter commentaries.