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deathtocapslock2009-08-04 03:28 pm
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Deathly Hallows Chapter 13
Here's this week's installment:
The Muggle-Born Registration Commission
The careful, I mean stupid plan of the Trio to infiltrate the Ministry of Magic begins to fall apart as this chapter starts. Umbridge immediately snags Hermione/Mafalda to help with interrogations of Muggle-Borns. The Trio are now separated. Which is why it would have been better to send in one person in the first place.
Pius Thicknesse is described as looking like a crab peering out from beneath a rock. I’m struck by this, since Scrimgeour was described as looking like a lion. If you’re looking for astrological symbolism, then we might be moving backwards through the signs. Which would make Fudge a Virgo. But he seems more like a Libra to me—since his main character trait is indecision. And there’s no way that Kingsley Shacklebolt represents Gemini. Darn! Another completely random theory blasted!
Harry’s Imperidar does not work with Thicknesse. He notices no glazed look, even though we were told that the Death Eaters Imperiused the Minister of Magic.
Oddly, even though he is talking to the Minister of Magic, Harry isn’t compelled to start demanding that anyone be released or that Umbridge be fired. Maybe that dislike of Scrimgeour was purely personal.
Or maybe it’s the polyjuice. Harry, as we are will be reminded throughout this chapter (until we aren’t), is Albert Runcorn. Tall, buff, and with the reputation of being a Death Eater bully.
Which brings me to a thought I had reading this book for the first time. It’s a bit subtle, but I think there is a thematic reason for Harry taking on this identity. It’s a way for Harry to experience the kind of line that Snape walks all the time—where he is perceived as evil, and where any attempt to save others is extremely dangerous.
In his invisibility cloak, Harry searches for Umbridge’s office. With every moment, the complexity and impenetrability of the Ministry forces itself upon him. (Orwellian! Orwellian!) Yes, Harry. The Ministry is big and complicated. That’s why it would have been a good idea to get help from the one of the people who actually work there.
Harry realizes now that the plan he and the others were working on for four weeks is “laughably childish.” I don’t think JKR can blame readers for finding her plot stupid when the main character keeps coming out and declaring that it’s stupid himself.
And, by the way, this isn’t the first time they did this exact thing. They went to the Ministry in OotP with no exit plan, either. The difference was that in OotP, it took them about five minutes to come up with the plan to get in, and this time it took four weeks.
Hehe. Harry even takes the time to note that his whole purpose in coming to the Ministry (to find Umbridge) is screwed up, because he’s on Level One and she’s down in the ninth circle of Hell or whatever.
But he decides to go search her office. Even though he realizes that nobody in the right minds would be storing valuable jewelry in an office, where anyone could wander in and steal it.
But what the hell. How else is Harry going to see the Orwellian nightmare of… pamphlet making!
Yes, apparently one of Umbridge’s duties is to oversee the creation of anti-Muggle-Born propaganda. Harry comes upon an office pool of workers, all using their wands in complicated twiddling patterns to fold bits of pink paper into pamphlets. I can’t quite figure out if they are merely folding the paper, or “printing” them. But, since we know later on that there are printing presses in the WW, it seems silly to use manual labor. Then again, it’s more Orwellian, isn’t it?
Harry sneaks a pamphlet to look at it. There is no author’s name on the piece, but Harry’s MFI starts to tingle. I swear, Harry must be Umbridge’s Horcrux, as well as Voldemort’s.
Harry discovers that Moody’s eye is stuck in the door to Umbridge’s office and rage rears in him “like a snake.” Is that snake in his chest? If so, things must be getting pretty crowded in there.
Harry uses a Decoy Detonator to distract the pamphlet makers and steps into Umbridge’s office. He finds a telescope stuck into the door so that Umbridge can watch her workers through Moody’s magical eye. I’m not sure why she couldn’t simply use the telescope without the eye.
I’m also wondering if Dumbledore had a similar arrangement at the Dursley house in order to keep an eye on Harry, as he told Harry he had watched him more closely than Harry realized. Well, maybe Dumbledore just used a nanny-cam or something.
Anyway, Harry takes Moody’s eye. He doesn’t seem to replace the telescope, which would have been a good idea, I think. An even better idea would have been to transfigure something to look like the eye and replace it. But Hermione hasn’t shown Harry how to do that sort of thing yet.
Umbridge is so gosh-darned evil that even her paperclips are evil. They coil out, snakelike, from their drawer as Harry searches it and have to be beaten back. Now, why the heck would anyone have paperclips that do that? Maybe it was someone’s idea of a prank?
Harry also finds a file on Artur Weasley that indicates his surrogate father is being tracked and may be in some danger. That’s disturbing for Harry, but not nearly as disturbing as finding out that he has a new nickname: Undesirable No. 1.
Hehe. Harry is worse than Voldemort now!
I wonder. Is there any pretense left about hunting Voldemort? Did the Wizarding World just forget about him? I mean, he’s not the Minister of Magic. So… what is Voldemort in official terms now?
Oh wait, never mind about that. Harry sees Dumbledore’s picture! That’s more important! Although it turns out to be the cover of Skeeter’s biography, Harry initially thinks that Dumbledore is looking at him through a mirror.
Okay. The book is on a bookcase. There’s writing on Dumbledore’s hat and chest. But Harry’s first conclusion is that dead Dumbledore is staring at him out of a magical mirror. Occam’s Razor, Harry. Look it up.
Harry opens that book to a photograph of Dumbledore having sex, I mean, laughing immoderately with a blond, curly-haired boy with a gleeful, wild look. Heh. Sounds like Sirius Black with a dye job. Despite the fact that this boy is the second most notorious wizard of the twentieth century, Harry has no idea who it might be—and he’s interrupted by Thicknesse before he can read the caption on the photo. Because there's a lot of hard words in that caption, you know.
Harry escapes through the now open door and reviews his progress so far. It’s pretty much bumpkiss, and there’s no hope of accosting Umbridge when she’s in a crowded place. See, one would have hoped he’d come to this conclusion during that four weeks of planning.
By sheer luck, Harry runs into Ron in the lift. By sheer ineptitude, Ron has already forgotten what Harry looks like.
Mr. Weasley then comes into the lift. Harry is weirded out by Arthur glaring at him. He’s even more disconcerted when Arthur blames him for targeting Dirk Cresswell. (See? I told you he’d come up again!) And then Arthur takes Harry’s attempt to warn him about being watched as a threat, leaving Harry very shaken.
Welcome to Snape’s world, Harry. He gets glared at all the time by people he’s trying to help and his motives are always taken for the worst.
Now looking for Hermione, Harry descends into the lower depths of the Orwellian nightmare Ministry. The halls are thick with Dementors, and the Muggle-Borns awaiting questioning have no wands to protect themselves.
This section is actually pretty good. The description of the hallway is quite horrifying. So is the interview of Mary Cattermole.
Harry is naturally pissed off by the whole evil interrogation, but you know what really gets him angry? When Umbridge lies and says the locket is a family heirloom. What is it about Harry and people using the possessions he throws out that causes this type of rage? Could it have something to do with the fact that his parents left him a vault full of gold and absolutely nothing of sentimental value?
Anyway, Harry’s rage causes him to do yet another stupid thing. He stuns Umbridge, which causes her cat Patronus to disappear, leaving all of them vulnerable to the Dementors.
Mary Cattermole nearly gets soul-sucked before Harry casts his own, distinctive stag Patronus to prevent it.
Then, of course, Harry stupidly refers to “Mafalda” as “Hermione.” Way to keep under cover, Harry.
Meanwhile, Hermione is frantically trying to transfigure a replacement for the locket, under the impression that, somehow, it’s going to make a difference if Umbridge never realizes her locket is gone. Do they think that Umbridge would raise a stink about it and that it would get back to Voldemort and he’d realize it was his Horcrux? How likely does that really sound?
See—I think it would be more important to say, not start calling each other “Harry” and “Hermione.” If Umbridge discovers her locket gone, there’s a whole Ministry of people who could have taken it. And it’s not like the real Mafalda would know anything about it.
Unsurprisingly, Hermione knows how to release Mary Cattermole from the restraining chair and Harry does not.
But that’s okay, because Hermione can’t conjure a Patronus as well as Harry can. That’s the difference between an E and an O on your O.W.L., baby!
Come to think of it, Harry’s just lucky that releasing people from chains wasn’t one of the practical tests during the O.W.L.s.
But, using their Patroni to keep back the Dementors, Harry and Hermione proceed to liberate all the waiting Muggle-Borns. As they do so, Harry starts to realize that showing up in the lobby of the Ministry with twenty accused Muggle-Borns and two Patroni is going to be a bit of a giveaway. That’s right, Harry. Tell us again how stupid this is.
Ron arrives to provide comic relief by looking like Mary’s husband and being wet.
Ron tells Harry that someone discovered the hole in Umbridge’s door and they have about five minutes to get out of the Ministry. This is why it might have been a good idea to put that telescope back. And, if possible, stick a ping-pong ball in the hole.
Harry has the sense to pair up people with wands with those without (presumably to Apparate away). He does not have the sense to tell people what they should do with their wands.
I wonder why half of the Muggle-Borns were allowed to have their wands when half of them had their wands confiscated at the front desk. Was it perhaps to make this next part seem not quite so idiotic? Whatever.
They all arrive in the Atrium to find wizards sealing off the fireplaces.
Harry comes up with the brilliant idea to use his Runcorn identity to bully the wizards into letting the Muggle-Borns leave. He even mentions how he “examined” Dirk Cresswell’s family tree and threatens to do so with any wizard who challenges him. Hmm, using one’s misdeeds to bluster through a sticky situation? Again, welcome to Snape’s world.
Oh, and it’s complete with an impressively deep voice. If Alan Rickman weren’t already playing Snape in the movies, he’d have been a shoo-in for the part of Runcorn.
At this moment, both the real Reg Cattermole and Yaxley (who was in the room with Umbridge) appear, causing mass confusion. Harry tries to divert suspicion onto a “balding wizard” by punching him in the nose (sending him “flying through the air”) and accusing him of helping Muggle-Borns escape.
Ron having grabbed Mary Cattermole and pulled her into a fireplace, Harry does the same to Hermione. They come up into the bathroom to find Ron wrestling with Mary. Because that’s funny.
Yaxley immediately follows Harry and Hermione. Harry Apparates the Trio out of the bathroom and they land on the front steps of Grimauld Place, but Hermione immediately Apparates them away, ending the chapter on another cliffhanger.
I have to confess that this last part of the chapter left me hideously confused the first two or three times I read it. For one thing, I couldn’t figure out who it was that Harry punched. And for another thing, it seemed like they left Mary back in the bathroom with Yaxley. Which would mean that she’d be immediately recaptured. Nor did I catch the part where the Muggle-Borns actually get out of the Atrium before Yaxley shows up.
Reading it carefully, I do see that many of the Muggle-Borns were able to get away. And, since Yaxley latched onto Hermione, there's at least some hope that Mary could get away.
Not that she had a wand or anything to Apparate with.
Fan Service:
Lots of lovely Ministry details to add to what we already know.
The return of Umbridge’s kitten plates!
Fan Slappage:
In the brief glimpse we get of him, Percy does not appear to be a secret spy.
Nothing that bad happens to Umbridge. Unless maybe her soul was sucked out when they left her stunned in the interrogation room with four rampaging Dementors.
DVD Extras:
INT: DAY – LONDON PUBLIC TOILET
HARRY
LET’S GO!
He grabs onto Ron and Hermione and they Apparate. At the last moment, Yaxley grabs Hermione’s elbow and disappears as well.
MARY CATTERMOLE, left in the sudden silence of the bathroom, clutches onto the sink behind her to calm her panic.
With a FLUSHING SOUND, REG CATTERMOLE appears in a nearby stall. He stares at his wife.
REG
What happened?
He rushes over to embrace her.
MARY
I’m… I’m not sure. But it’s not safe.
There are more FLUSHING SOUNDS and three Ministry Aurors emerge from the stalls, their wands out. Reg turns, sheltering Mary with outstretched arms.
REG
What do you want?
AUROR
Come along quietly. You won’t get hurt.
REG
I’m not going any---
He’s interrupted by three echoing gunshots. BANG! BANG! BANG!
The three Aurors, looking very surprised, drop to the floor, bleeding.
REG
What?
He turns to his wife, who is holding a smoking gun in one hand and her handbag in the other.
REG (cont’d)
What the hell is that thing?
MARY
(calmly reloading)
It’s called an automatic, dear. Do you have your wand?
REG
Yes.
MARY
Listen carefully. I want you to go get the kids. Meet me at the train station.
REG
Where are we going?
MARY
We’re going to live in my world for a while.
FADE OUT.
Hey, if you haven't seen A Very Potter Musical, check it out. It's really funny.
The Muggle-Born Registration Commission
The careful, I mean stupid plan of the Trio to infiltrate the Ministry of Magic begins to fall apart as this chapter starts. Umbridge immediately snags Hermione/Mafalda to help with interrogations of Muggle-Borns. The Trio are now separated. Which is why it would have been better to send in one person in the first place.
Pius Thicknesse is described as looking like a crab peering out from beneath a rock. I’m struck by this, since Scrimgeour was described as looking like a lion. If you’re looking for astrological symbolism, then we might be moving backwards through the signs. Which would make Fudge a Virgo. But he seems more like a Libra to me—since his main character trait is indecision. And there’s no way that Kingsley Shacklebolt represents Gemini. Darn! Another completely random theory blasted!
Harry’s Imperidar does not work with Thicknesse. He notices no glazed look, even though we were told that the Death Eaters Imperiused the Minister of Magic.
Oddly, even though he is talking to the Minister of Magic, Harry isn’t compelled to start demanding that anyone be released or that Umbridge be fired. Maybe that dislike of Scrimgeour was purely personal.
Or maybe it’s the polyjuice. Harry, as we are will be reminded throughout this chapter (until we aren’t), is Albert Runcorn. Tall, buff, and with the reputation of being a Death Eater bully.
Which brings me to a thought I had reading this book for the first time. It’s a bit subtle, but I think there is a thematic reason for Harry taking on this identity. It’s a way for Harry to experience the kind of line that Snape walks all the time—where he is perceived as evil, and where any attempt to save others is extremely dangerous.
In his invisibility cloak, Harry searches for Umbridge’s office. With every moment, the complexity and impenetrability of the Ministry forces itself upon him. (Orwellian! Orwellian!) Yes, Harry. The Ministry is big and complicated. That’s why it would have been a good idea to get help from the one of the people who actually work there.
Harry realizes now that the plan he and the others were working on for four weeks is “laughably childish.” I don’t think JKR can blame readers for finding her plot stupid when the main character keeps coming out and declaring that it’s stupid himself.
And, by the way, this isn’t the first time they did this exact thing. They went to the Ministry in OotP with no exit plan, either. The difference was that in OotP, it took them about five minutes to come up with the plan to get in, and this time it took four weeks.
Hehe. Harry even takes the time to note that his whole purpose in coming to the Ministry (to find Umbridge) is screwed up, because he’s on Level One and she’s down in the ninth circle of Hell or whatever.
But he decides to go search her office. Even though he realizes that nobody in the right minds would be storing valuable jewelry in an office, where anyone could wander in and steal it.
But what the hell. How else is Harry going to see the Orwellian nightmare of… pamphlet making!
Yes, apparently one of Umbridge’s duties is to oversee the creation of anti-Muggle-Born propaganda. Harry comes upon an office pool of workers, all using their wands in complicated twiddling patterns to fold bits of pink paper into pamphlets. I can’t quite figure out if they are merely folding the paper, or “printing” them. But, since we know later on that there are printing presses in the WW, it seems silly to use manual labor. Then again, it’s more Orwellian, isn’t it?
Harry sneaks a pamphlet to look at it. There is no author’s name on the piece, but Harry’s MFI starts to tingle. I swear, Harry must be Umbridge’s Horcrux, as well as Voldemort’s.
Harry discovers that Moody’s eye is stuck in the door to Umbridge’s office and rage rears in him “like a snake.” Is that snake in his chest? If so, things must be getting pretty crowded in there.
Harry uses a Decoy Detonator to distract the pamphlet makers and steps into Umbridge’s office. He finds a telescope stuck into the door so that Umbridge can watch her workers through Moody’s magical eye. I’m not sure why she couldn’t simply use the telescope without the eye.
I’m also wondering if Dumbledore had a similar arrangement at the Dursley house in order to keep an eye on Harry, as he told Harry he had watched him more closely than Harry realized. Well, maybe Dumbledore just used a nanny-cam or something.
Anyway, Harry takes Moody’s eye. He doesn’t seem to replace the telescope, which would have been a good idea, I think. An even better idea would have been to transfigure something to look like the eye and replace it. But Hermione hasn’t shown Harry how to do that sort of thing yet.
Umbridge is so gosh-darned evil that even her paperclips are evil. They coil out, snakelike, from their drawer as Harry searches it and have to be beaten back. Now, why the heck would anyone have paperclips that do that? Maybe it was someone’s idea of a prank?
Harry also finds a file on Artur Weasley that indicates his surrogate father is being tracked and may be in some danger. That’s disturbing for Harry, but not nearly as disturbing as finding out that he has a new nickname: Undesirable No. 1.
Hehe. Harry is worse than Voldemort now!
I wonder. Is there any pretense left about hunting Voldemort? Did the Wizarding World just forget about him? I mean, he’s not the Minister of Magic. So… what is Voldemort in official terms now?
Oh wait, never mind about that. Harry sees Dumbledore’s picture! That’s more important! Although it turns out to be the cover of Skeeter’s biography, Harry initially thinks that Dumbledore is looking at him through a mirror.
Okay. The book is on a bookcase. There’s writing on Dumbledore’s hat and chest. But Harry’s first conclusion is that dead Dumbledore is staring at him out of a magical mirror. Occam’s Razor, Harry. Look it up.
Harry opens that book to a photograph of Dumbledore having sex, I mean, laughing immoderately with a blond, curly-haired boy with a gleeful, wild look. Heh. Sounds like Sirius Black with a dye job. Despite the fact that this boy is the second most notorious wizard of the twentieth century, Harry has no idea who it might be—and he’s interrupted by Thicknesse before he can read the caption on the photo. Because there's a lot of hard words in that caption, you know.
Harry escapes through the now open door and reviews his progress so far. It’s pretty much bumpkiss, and there’s no hope of accosting Umbridge when she’s in a crowded place. See, one would have hoped he’d come to this conclusion during that four weeks of planning.
By sheer luck, Harry runs into Ron in the lift. By sheer ineptitude, Ron has already forgotten what Harry looks like.
Mr. Weasley then comes into the lift. Harry is weirded out by Arthur glaring at him. He’s even more disconcerted when Arthur blames him for targeting Dirk Cresswell. (See? I told you he’d come up again!) And then Arthur takes Harry’s attempt to warn him about being watched as a threat, leaving Harry very shaken.
Welcome to Snape’s world, Harry. He gets glared at all the time by people he’s trying to help and his motives are always taken for the worst.
Now looking for Hermione, Harry descends into the lower depths of the Orwellian nightmare Ministry. The halls are thick with Dementors, and the Muggle-Borns awaiting questioning have no wands to protect themselves.
This section is actually pretty good. The description of the hallway is quite horrifying. So is the interview of Mary Cattermole.
Harry is naturally pissed off by the whole evil interrogation, but you know what really gets him angry? When Umbridge lies and says the locket is a family heirloom. What is it about Harry and people using the possessions he throws out that causes this type of rage? Could it have something to do with the fact that his parents left him a vault full of gold and absolutely nothing of sentimental value?
Anyway, Harry’s rage causes him to do yet another stupid thing. He stuns Umbridge, which causes her cat Patronus to disappear, leaving all of them vulnerable to the Dementors.
Mary Cattermole nearly gets soul-sucked before Harry casts his own, distinctive stag Patronus to prevent it.
Then, of course, Harry stupidly refers to “Mafalda” as “Hermione.” Way to keep under cover, Harry.
Meanwhile, Hermione is frantically trying to transfigure a replacement for the locket, under the impression that, somehow, it’s going to make a difference if Umbridge never realizes her locket is gone. Do they think that Umbridge would raise a stink about it and that it would get back to Voldemort and he’d realize it was his Horcrux? How likely does that really sound?
See—I think it would be more important to say, not start calling each other “Harry” and “Hermione.” If Umbridge discovers her locket gone, there’s a whole Ministry of people who could have taken it. And it’s not like the real Mafalda would know anything about it.
Unsurprisingly, Hermione knows how to release Mary Cattermole from the restraining chair and Harry does not.
But that’s okay, because Hermione can’t conjure a Patronus as well as Harry can. That’s the difference between an E and an O on your O.W.L., baby!
Come to think of it, Harry’s just lucky that releasing people from chains wasn’t one of the practical tests during the O.W.L.s.
But, using their Patroni to keep back the Dementors, Harry and Hermione proceed to liberate all the waiting Muggle-Borns. As they do so, Harry starts to realize that showing up in the lobby of the Ministry with twenty accused Muggle-Borns and two Patroni is going to be a bit of a giveaway. That’s right, Harry. Tell us again how stupid this is.
Ron arrives to provide comic relief by looking like Mary’s husband and being wet.
Ron tells Harry that someone discovered the hole in Umbridge’s door and they have about five minutes to get out of the Ministry. This is why it might have been a good idea to put that telescope back. And, if possible, stick a ping-pong ball in the hole.
Harry has the sense to pair up people with wands with those without (presumably to Apparate away). He does not have the sense to tell people what they should do with their wands.
I wonder why half of the Muggle-Borns were allowed to have their wands when half of them had their wands confiscated at the front desk. Was it perhaps to make this next part seem not quite so idiotic? Whatever.
They all arrive in the Atrium to find wizards sealing off the fireplaces.
Harry comes up with the brilliant idea to use his Runcorn identity to bully the wizards into letting the Muggle-Borns leave. He even mentions how he “examined” Dirk Cresswell’s family tree and threatens to do so with any wizard who challenges him. Hmm, using one’s misdeeds to bluster through a sticky situation? Again, welcome to Snape’s world.
Oh, and it’s complete with an impressively deep voice. If Alan Rickman weren’t already playing Snape in the movies, he’d have been a shoo-in for the part of Runcorn.
At this moment, both the real Reg Cattermole and Yaxley (who was in the room with Umbridge) appear, causing mass confusion. Harry tries to divert suspicion onto a “balding wizard” by punching him in the nose (sending him “flying through the air”) and accusing him of helping Muggle-Borns escape.
Ron having grabbed Mary Cattermole and pulled her into a fireplace, Harry does the same to Hermione. They come up into the bathroom to find Ron wrestling with Mary. Because that’s funny.
Yaxley immediately follows Harry and Hermione. Harry Apparates the Trio out of the bathroom and they land on the front steps of Grimauld Place, but Hermione immediately Apparates them away, ending the chapter on another cliffhanger.
I have to confess that this last part of the chapter left me hideously confused the first two or three times I read it. For one thing, I couldn’t figure out who it was that Harry punched. And for another thing, it seemed like they left Mary back in the bathroom with Yaxley. Which would mean that she’d be immediately recaptured. Nor did I catch the part where the Muggle-Borns actually get out of the Atrium before Yaxley shows up.
Reading it carefully, I do see that many of the Muggle-Borns were able to get away. And, since Yaxley latched onto Hermione, there's at least some hope that Mary could get away.
Not that she had a wand or anything to Apparate with.
Fan Service:
Lots of lovely Ministry details to add to what we already know.
The return of Umbridge’s kitten plates!
Fan Slappage:
In the brief glimpse we get of him, Percy does not appear to be a secret spy.
Nothing that bad happens to Umbridge. Unless maybe her soul was sucked out when they left her stunned in the interrogation room with four rampaging Dementors.
DVD Extras:
INT: DAY – LONDON PUBLIC TOILET
HARRY
LET’S GO!
He grabs onto Ron and Hermione and they Apparate. At the last moment, Yaxley grabs Hermione’s elbow and disappears as well.
MARY CATTERMOLE, left in the sudden silence of the bathroom, clutches onto the sink behind her to calm her panic.
With a FLUSHING SOUND, REG CATTERMOLE appears in a nearby stall. He stares at his wife.
REG
What happened?
He rushes over to embrace her.
MARY
I’m… I’m not sure. But it’s not safe.
There are more FLUSHING SOUNDS and three Ministry Aurors emerge from the stalls, their wands out. Reg turns, sheltering Mary with outstretched arms.
REG
What do you want?
AUROR
Come along quietly. You won’t get hurt.
REG
I’m not going any---
He’s interrupted by three echoing gunshots. BANG! BANG! BANG!
The three Aurors, looking very surprised, drop to the floor, bleeding.
REG
What?
He turns to his wife, who is holding a smoking gun in one hand and her handbag in the other.
REG (cont’d)
What the hell is that thing?
MARY
(calmly reloading)
It’s called an automatic, dear. Do you have your wand?
REG
Yes.
MARY
Listen carefully. I want you to go get the kids. Meet me at the train station.
REG
Where are we going?
MARY
We’re going to live in my world for a while.
FADE OUT.
Hey, if you haven't seen A Very Potter Musical, check it out. It's really funny.
no subject
*(snip)*
Welcome to Snape’s world, Harry. He gets glared at all the time by people he’s trying to help and his motives are always taken for the worst.
Too bad Rowling never struck in this direction. It might have saved some angst for Snape fans later on...
Wait. o_O Why would Rowling want that?
Way to keep under cover, Harry.
At this rate I wonder why fandom has him under covers so often after DH's release.
Unsurprisingly, Hermione knows how to release Mary Cattermole from the restraining chair and Harry does not.
Press in at both sides and the oval dot on top simultaneously and pull. The plastic clip should unlock...
Sorry, those are the instructions for unclasping the child safety belt in the WalMart carts. The WW hasn't advanced to the oval dot yet.
Hmm, using one’s misdeeds to bluster through a sticky situation? Again, welcome to Snape’s world.
Why didn't Rowling go there? *angst!*
Nothing that bad happens to Umbridge. Unless maybe her soul was sucked out when they left her stunned in the interrogation room with four rampaging Dementors.
Now at least she'll have a new nightmare to replace the centaurs (if she didn't get soul-sucked, that is).
BANG! BANG! BANG! *(snip)* MARY: We’re going to live in my world for a while.
Fan service!
no subject
Well, that's the thing, isn't it? It's there if you want to read the tea leaves, but it's so very little there that it feels like fanwanking to even mention it.
If it were really there, I think Harry would need to acknowledge it somehow. I've read a ton of fanfics in which Harry goes at some point, "Huh. Snape actually had a very hard time doing all that spying and saving my life. Maybe I should cut him a break."
But JKR never provides that moment, so we leap from Harry hating Snape to Harry deciding that Snape's memories would make a refreshing break from the battle to Harry using Snape to taunt Voldemort to Harry naming his son after Dumbledore and Snape.
Of course, JKR didn't want to ruin the surprise of Snape being DDM (or, more accurately, LEM), so she didn't want to tip her hand by having Harry start to rethink Snape. But while it may work for the reader to realign their thinking (since they have the luxury of putting the book down for a day or two--not that anyone did), it doesn't work at all for Harry.
Unless he was re-thinking Snape all along. Which is why Harry should have been obsessing about Snape in DH--and zig-zagging between hatred and wondering if he had missed something important, instead of focusing on Dumbledore, who was, as I have pointed out, dead.
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I'm not sure any more that Rowling noticed a lot of these things that seem so obvious to fans. James as a bully instead of a shining hero, Snape as a hero instead of an unworthy mud stain, Harry as a do-nothing know-nothing instead of a classic hero, Hermione as Umbridge in training instead of teh awsum, the Weasley twins, Draco & Co. as slugs being bullied, etc., etc. Fans saw more and latched onto more, I think.
If it were really there, I think Harry would need to acknowledge it somehow.
Isn't that the point of a coming of age or bildingsroman or heroic journey? Isn't there supposed to be a second layer, the spiritual layer, going on, too? Or maturation level or something?
Of course, JKR didn't want to ruin the surprise of Snape being DDM (or, more accurately, LEM), so she didn't want to tip her hand by having Harry start to rethink Snape.
And when it's all over, why the secrecy? If someone guesses, leave them guessing. She did it with the "is he or isn't he" DDM/ESE, why not with this? Or was the guessing another fan thing that Rowling missed?
Yes, Harry should have been thinking of Snape, not Dumbles, in DHs. The guy who killed his mentor, the guy who was shown being bullied by James & Co., the guy who pervades Harry's senses more than Voldemort, who Harry wants to hate, and does hate even more than he hates his mortal enemy, the guy in charge of the school where Harry's beloved is a student, should be the one he finally measures himself against and figures out, not Mr. Lemon Drop Mentor. Even if Dumbles was just laid up, busy or on hold, Harry should have been obsessing over Snape.
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My strong sense that JKR missed pretty much all of the themes implied in the series is a big reason I find the books so hard to discuss now. (Aside from the, "What went wrong and when?" sort.) It feels like I'm pasting on depth that JKR not only didn't mean to have, but a depth she'd actually resent being suggested.
I'm very cool with finding things in a text that I think the author didn't consciously include. But actually fighting with the author isn't as much fun. If that makes any kind of sense. :)
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But I end up concluding that JKR wasn't really thinking at all. Or if she was... I guess she'd have to thinking of something, it was about something I wasn't really interested in. I mean, I was never that interested in Dumbledore's backstory.
So, I ended up skipping most of the Dumbledore stuff in my first reading. Just like I continue to skip the Grawp stuff in OotP.
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I totally agree. I also wonder exactly what JKR thought caught the imagination of so many adults over the years. Yes, she's a good story teller and the world she created is sparkling and fun - on the surface at least. It doesn't bear too much scutiny, but a lot of that could have been dealt with by re-reading on a regular basis rather than contradicting herself from book to book.
JKR admits to spending time on the many websites, she must be aware how much weight some fans attributed to her story. Did she think they were mad? Were they? The thing is, when inspiration failed her, instead of taking her lead from a talent free bunch of accountants in Hollywood, She should have cribbed from some of the impressively academic and well thought out analysis on the web during the last five years or so. Please note, I don't mean the attitude of certain tiresome 13 year olds that insisted that the next generation would be called Lily Ginny Molly, or James Sirius Harry Remus Albus Arthur, or that Snape was OMG in love, or that Harry was the hero, he should *so* end up with the heroine (which was Fleur or Luna in my book) that seemed to inform the end of the series.
I liked the idea that Madame Pince was Snape's mother, you know the Irma Pince = I'm a Prince theory. I was sure that Dumbledore protecting Snape's mother when things got rough and continuing to give her sanctuary was why he knew he could trust Snape. It would have been easy to tweak HBP so that Snape's mother was emphasised as trying to protect her son from his violent muggle father. It would explain
1. Why Snape hated Muggles
2. Why he'd do anything for Dumbles - who had/was still protecting the *only* person he cared about.
3. Back up what Dumbles told Draco on the Astronomy Tower about being able to keep someone's family safe.
4. Save Snape from the pathetic unrequited love mutating into even more pathetic lifelong obsession scenario.
5. Tie in with JKR's more acceptable obsession with mother-love - and show the other side of it - the loyalty of the child concerned.
Didn't Madame Pince have sallow skin and a hooked nose? Or was that a Fanfic I read? Lily should have been the closest Snape got to a proper friend of his age, and guilt should have been sufficient as to why he asked Voldemort to spare her. Though I didn't like Snape as a person, he was definitely the fascinating character and deserved a better ending - I wouldn't have killed him either. Damn.
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What's kind of dumb about the way she did it was that you'd think losing Lily's friendship over the Mudblood comment would have been enough to keep Snape from joining up with the Death Eaters. I mean, we don't really know why he joined up in the first place. Yes, Snape is pathetically in need of friends, but only one friend. We don't see that he cares about or needs his other friends. He's essentially a loner.
Maybe if she'd included a scene where Snape is inducted prior to SWM? (Madame V. Hunter had this theory that Snape went into the tunnel during the Prank on Voldemort's orders.)
But I don't think we need more than Lily's death to bring Snape back to Dumbledore. And, if you squint, there's indications that Snape's love for one person eventually expanded to include everyone.
The sad thing is that it seemed like there was only one person who ever loved Snape. And her love was remarkably shallow and conditional.
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Once he'd lost Lily's friendship, he had nothing left to lose, so wouldn't he be *more* vulnerable to being recruited by Death Eaters? I'm not talking the Bellatrix type of nutter, but the older, smooth and manipulative Lucius type, who did watch out for him (if I remember rightly) and who Snape obviously respected, at least at first. In fact, this regard must have meant something, because that's surely why he watches out for Draco more than the other Death Eater Spawn in Harry's class. (If Draco is *actually* Snape's godson, not just in fan fics, I'm sorry!)
It would have made just as much sense if this rejection made him so bitter towards Muggleborns that he actively wanted to work against them. Then when Lily died because of this prejudice, he could be horrified at what he'd become and work for Dumbles. I'd have preferred that to what we got.
I agree she had the right to tell *her* story, but as that consisted of Deathly Hallows, I'm no longer a fan!
- "if you squint, there's indications that Snape's love for one person eventually expanded to include everyone."
I have to say that the reason I don't like Snape as a person is the relentless favouritisim and bullying from a teacher, that can cause permanent damage in certain types of people. It was good in the story, however, because his being a nasty person doing the right thing made him far more interesting. A lot of that was lost by making him simply love-lorn. Snape was never 'simple' - or maybe JKR would think that's a reader over-analyzing?
- "The sad thing is that it seemed like there was only one person who ever loved Snape. And her love was remarkably shallow and conditional."
Do you mean Lily - I'm actually not sure! The really sad thing about his life is that I can't think of anyone genuinely loving Snape at all. That and being constantly miserable, in danger, messed about by Dumbledore for years, then dying in the company of three people he despised, who didn't even try to save him. Poor git.
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If you are asked to join, you don't get the power of refusal. So the real question is why the DEs would *ask* the scruffy little halfblood with no money and no connections to join their private club and trach him the sekret handshake.
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A lot of the Death Eaters seemed to be well bred brawn and muscle. You're right, they belonged because of who they were, not what they could do. If Crabbe and Goyle were anything like their sons.....! Maybe Lucius Malfoy and the other, more intelligent DEs knew that they needed at least a few people with genius or at least exceptional intelligence to balance out the in-breds. I don't mean the 'learn every word in a text book written by someone else' sort of smarts, like Hermione - surely each generation/all wizarding schools would have people like that? I mean people like Snape with the imagination to constantly come up with their own spells and solutions - must have been rare. Hermione seemed very bright when she came up with the spells in Order of the Phoenix to contact the DA and guarantee their silence, but I think she just read ahead to Newt Level. Harry, with the help of the Half Blood Prince showed the difference between well read and naturally brilliant quite clearly in HBP.
I don't know how sophisticated sectumsempra was, but I presume Snape was in sixth year when he used (and constantly improved)the established text book with things he'd worked out on his own, maybe before that year. That's why Harry could suddenly exceed Hermione's performance - because Snape had that extra something. What he lacked was self confidence. Malfoy would have seen that he was vulnerable to admiration and attention. Grooming isn't only sexual, despite what fan fic writers might think! His 'inferiority' would only make him even more anxious to please and in awe of his 'betters' At least that was the belief....
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We fans pick up on the subtle clues of Snape being undefended and needy. But that's never exactly shown. What we are shown is that Snape is unpleasant, painfully focused on Lily, and entrenched enough in his peer group to defend Mulciber as having a laugh.
If he was so focused on Lily, he couldn't help but figure out that she'd object to him joining the Death Eaters even more than she objected to his using the term "Mudblood." Desperation would make a good reason for him to join the DEs, but he isn't shown as desperate until he finds out that Lily is threatened.
And the Dean Thomas theory is good, too. But it's not in the books.
We're missing a link in the story. Just like we're missing that part of the story where James stopped being a jerk. Unless we're supposed to extrapolate the Hermione/Ron relationship to Lily/James and infer that James bought "Twelves Ways to Charm a Witch"?
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If we're going to stick to what we've been shown, he decides to join the friends he has left and get the Dark Mark when Lily slams the portrait of the Fat Lady in his face. It's over. Fine. How do you like this, Miss High-n-Mighty? Like your friends are all that perfect. *snap* It's the rebound theory of Snape joining, I guess.
Are you having a laugh!
Yes! That’s exactly the sort of sophisticated and subtle writing that JKR constantly attempted throughout DH. I particularly appreciated her attempt to refine the distinguishing characteristics of heroism in the 21st century with the startling ‘vomiting on Mafalda Hopkirk’s shoes’ incident. What about her fearless probing into the complexities of psychophysiological illness with the ‘Kreacher hitting Mundungus over the head with a frying pan’ scene? And of course we are not worthy to discuss her ground-breaking and rather cheeky rejection of Freud’s definition of the human psyche with the thought provoking ‘Snape shaped hole'.
OK, I’m being a teeny bit sarcastic! However I think you’re being somewhat kind to JKR. Maybe I’m being harsh, but even the earlier books didn’t show too much in the way of sophistication – they were just very good stories. By OotP they’d gone right downhill. Nobody in the story realised that Hermione’s character strongly mirrored Umbridge – right down to loyalty driving her to really unjustifiable behaviour. If JKR was at all aware of this, she’d have ensured she was admonished, not obviously expected us to admire her for it. She turned her heroine into a less attractive character then her usual bully whipping boy, Pansy Parkinson. What about Harry, approaching the apex of his heroic journey, finally managing to torture someone?
JKR hated Snape, she didn’t seem to understand or care what he went through. I didn’t *like* Snape much, either, yet I’m well aware of the tightrope he walked everyday for years. JKR should have at least appreciated and tried to understand all her characters, no matter what she thought of them as people. Instead she was almost immature in her point scoring and trying to force her readership to ‘like’ the nice ones and ‘hate’ the bad ones. (Her definition of course) I can’t help feeling that Snape’s fascinating character was an accident – she had no idea that people could actually like someone who detested the ‘hero’, just as she expected us to like the dashing James, despite his being a right d*ck.
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It probably was so obvious to her she didn't realise it wasn't to her readers. She *told* us Snape had been a DE, so he must have done and seen some awful things, but when sh shows his past she only show him at hhis most vulnerable. Just as she *told* us James was a basically decent boy who grew up into a good man, but does she show it? Nope, she shows a bully.
Dear Jo it's "show, don't tell" not "tell, don't show".
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And realizing that SWM came after what should have been the defining moment of the Prank made James into a monster bully, rather than a normal kid.
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And I don't think Rowling can see that even now.
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However, probably part of the reason Snape is such a fascinating character is because he's so despised by his creator. I doubt JKR hates Snape. I remember her tart reply to an interviewer who asked why he wasn't the villain of PS/SS. The quote was something like this: "I know Snape and I know he would never wear a turban."
Which said to me that she, at that time anyway, had a pretty good author/character relationship with him.
But she certainly never let up on him. Not the teeniest, tiniest, little bit. And she never apologized for it, either, the way she did for making Harry suffer so much.
Because we readers perceive the character as not being justly served by the author*, we remain fascinated by him.
*Except for those who truly hate Snape. I know there are some who think getting bit in the neck by a snake was too good for him.
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But I have to remember that I'm biased in the matter, having spent two years insisting and arguing that Snape was DDM.
The shock for me in the "The Prince's Tale" was not that Snape was loyal, but how badly he was treated by those he was loyal to.
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ESE = Ever So Evil
ESG = Ever So Good (replaced by DDM later on)
SWM = Snape's Worst Memory from the chapter in OotP
That's what eventually converted me to the Not Dead Yet, side--either that, or the Deity is giving him far better treatment in the afterlife than he got in this life.
The Deity, in a fit of pique at the so-called heroes of this series, sent Snape right back to torment and devil them without the baggage of his former guilt and the burden of protecting ungrateful prats. And in every altercation, Snape wins.
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YES!! \o/ :D
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Also I would guess that his reaction to it when he is spying is that these people are ungrateful idiots where Harry feels disconcerted.
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And yes, I don't think she really saw the connection. There was this strong need in the story to have Harry realize the humanity in both Snape and Draco. But JKR didn't want to go there. At least she didn't want to go there as strongly as she wanted to go other ways. So, that need gets expressed in really screwed up, subliminal ways.
Like, instead of dealing with Snape directly in HBP, Harry reads a book that Snape made notes in. And, instead of dealing directly with Snape in DH, Harry saw a bunch of memories. Then, suddenly, he gets it and it's like none of the other stuff happened.
No wonder some readers still want Snape boiled in oil.
And, with Draco, Harry starts to pity Draco, but it never really moves beyond that. He never really comes to terms with who Draco is. Likewise, Draco just gets stuck having to feel grateful to Harry without an honor for himself.
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I suppose it’s a way of deflecting criticism - if you admit it makes no sense first, no-one will attack you for it. Maybe - but they can attack you for being so lazy/arrogant/stupid/drunk that you couldn’t be bothered to come up with a plot that at least bears some analysis before the flaws become apparent. Or better still, isn’t flawed. The fact that Harry (aka JKR) is thinking this, means that it can’t be blamed on poor editing - JKR *knew* this was all silly, but left it in anyway.
Or maybe this ineptitude was deliberate to show that Harry wasn’t perfect (hands up who ever thought that in the last three books.) It was a human mistake, like leading Sirius to his death. Or almost killing Malfoy. Or cheating at his lessons for months. Or dropping the vital (and now legal) Dumbledore’s Army, despite the fact that the external danger was even worse, and most of the children weren’t ‘Chosen’. Or keeping his pet WHO COULD FLY, locked in a cage during an attack, so that she was totally helpless – despite the Barn Owl’s proven tendency to explode on contact. That’s all leaving aside his nonsense later in DH. (Good luck recapping!) I think we got the message JKR. There’s human error, and there’s being mental. And don’t get me started on Super-Hermione-unless-the-plot-dictates-otherwise.
- “ Umbridge is so gosh-darned evil that even her paperclips are evil. They coil out, snakelike, from their drawer as Harry searches it and have to be beaten back.”
The F*ck? I rolled my eyes more than is healthy through this gripping chapter and don’t remember this at all. I could re-read, but I think I’ll leave you to kindly make the ultimate sacrifice on our behalf. What I originally liked about Umbridge was that she was definitely ‘bad’, but wasn’t evil like Bellatrix etc. Shades of grey and all that. Here she should be a collaborator, that would make sense – and also tie in with JKR’s worn out Nazi parallels. Instead, she’s all Voldemortish with the snakes and the stolen magical eye and the doo-dah.
- “ Harry has no idea who it might be—and he’s interrupted by Thicknesse”
He’s always being interrupted by his own thicknesse. For example:-
1. Harry’s rage causes him to do yet another stupid thing. He stuns Umbridge, which causes her cat Patronus to disappear
2. Then, of course, Harry stupidly refers to “Mafalda” as “Hermione.” Way to keep under cover, Harry.
3. Harry starts to realize that showing up in the lobby of the Ministry with twenty accused Muggle-Borns and two Patroni is going to be a bit of a giveaway.
Sigh
- “ Nothing that bad happens to Umbridge. Unless maybe her soul was sucked out when they left her stunned in the interrogation room with four rampaging Dementors.”
I don’t know why, but this line had me laughing uncontrollably. Hysteria, no doubt, brought on by this pile of rotting fish-heads of a chapter.
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I don't know. If Harry weren't constantly commenting on it, then it might not be so apparent. We might have taken it on faith that they had a really good plan that got screwed up by circumstances. And only the snarkiest among us would have pointed out that they didn't have a plan to begin with--and that they never have a plan beyond "Let's figure it out as we go along!"
But it's pretty obvious why this whole exercise took place. And no, it's not my theory of Harry-needs-to-walk-in-a -Death-Eater's-shoes. It's that JKR wanted to show us a bureaucracy run amuck and the awful power it can wield. Fair enough. But a) It was a stupid way to go about it and b) She couldn't figure out if she wanted to approach it like George Orwell or Terry Gilliam.
Because I suspect that all that Ron stuff is meant to be hee-larious. Only it isn't.
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Can someone explain to the lady that subverting the *story* isn't subverting the *genre*?
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***It does sound like something from Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes, doesn't it?
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When Dumbledore says he knows what goes on everywhere at school, he's being comforting and powerful, like your mom. When Umbridge keeps an eye on the office assistants, she's being Owellian.
Arthur's being tracked. Oh no. That's going to totally be dangerous for him, I'm sure. Not so dangerous that it will necessitate changing the daily schedule he's had for the past 25 years, but very dangerous indeed.
It's always great when characters on important missions create a small distraction and then are compelled to wander around the room checking out the brack-a-brack while the seconds tick by.
Of course it's Ron who's forgotten what Harry looks like and not the other way round, even though Harry's the one who doesn't know his classmates after 6 years.
Sadly, I imagine the Muggle-borns just being back at the Ministry the next week, shivering like frightened sheep all over again.
Love love love the deleted scene.
See, the whole saving of the Muggle-borns is a nice idea, but I was still just frustrated at what a set up it was. The Trio has this incredibly dumb idea just so that JKR can have them swing by the Ministry and save Muggleborns because *nobody else in the sodding WW will--least of all the magical Muggleborns themselves.*
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Yeah. But you know, everything about Umbridge is bad, even when it's completely ordinary. I realized that when Harry kept glaring at Scrimgeour for not firing Umbridge--when no one ever told Scrimgeour, or Fudge, what she had been up to. What exactly was he supposed to fire her for?
Arthur's being tracked. Oh no. That's going to totally be dangerous for him, I'm sure. Not so dangerous that it will necessitate changing the daily schedule he's had for the past 25 years, but very dangerous indeed.
Actually, keeping his schedule would probably be the safest thing he could do. It's when people change their behavior that authorities get itchy.
Sadly, I imagine the Muggle-borns just being back at the Ministry the next week, shivering like frightened sheep all over again.
Yes. Me, too. It wasn't until I did this sporking that I even realized they managed to get through the fireplaces. I know it's obligatory to show helpless victims in this sort of a story, but I really hate it. Like in Three Kings, an otherwise pretty good film set during the first Iraqi invasion, there's only one developed character among the Iragis--the one who tortures Matt Damon (or was it Mark Wahlberg?) There's also a few Iragi thugs, because you need them to overpower the Hero.
And then there's a whole crowd of Iraqi victims, whose only purpose is to look pathetic and tug at the heart strings of the Heroes. They might as well have been a crowd of puppies.
It left such a bad taste in my mouth. What an insulting way to depict an entire country!
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But isn't the fact Arthur is being tracked a sign that the authorities were getting itchy about him?
Anyway I think It's totally stupid that Arthur, a very well known blood traitor, stills goes to work in the ministry after the Voldemort take-over like nothing happened.
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Umbridge is so gosh-darned evil that even her paperclips are evil. They coil out, snakelike, from their drawer as Harry searches it and have to be beaten back. Now, why the heck would anyone have paperclips that do that? Maybe it was someone’s idea of a prank?
Maybe the twins invented them?
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I posted this link because Elizabeths blog is interesting even if you don't care about her books. The way she works is the "usual" way for an author. The book is your brainchild, the story and characters are yours, but you need feedback. In earlier posts Elizabeth's talking about her interaction with her editor, how she discussed certain things with friends and got a valid suggestion, and so on.
Now, certainly our Jo couldn't keep a blog, talking about her work and posting snippets that might or might not make it inte the final book. But I will never understand why she couldn't let some trusted persons in on the secrets and discuss her work with them.
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It's possible that Wizards would come up with a magical counter to bullets, but we'd have the element of surprise for a few weeks anyway.
And, I'd try to keep a stash of Muggle money and my old passport in a safe place.
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Mary Cattermole, being a witch, could transfigure a gun (or Confund a seller) and not worry about Muggle paperwork.
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MARY
We’re going to live in my world for a while.
Best line ever. :D
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But then I come here and am reminded why I am still bitter. Curse you, Rowling, you lucky hack.