deathtocapslock | COS Chapter Thirteen: "The Very Secret Diary" (Reply)

* Hermione’s really ashamed to be seen with a furry face. Pity the memory of this won’t stop her from cursing the words “SNEAK” across Marietta Edgecombe’s face in OOTP.

* Way to go, Dumbledore, giving the job of janitor to the person in the school least qualified for it. No wonder Filch has snapped.

* And Filch was so angry, he walked into Dumbledore’s office and beat him to death with a wet mop. The end.

* Ron’s once again demonstrating what it was like back when the WW was explained by somebody who might reasonably be expected to know about it, before he was lobotomised and his memories all given to Hermione.

* Ron’s had to spend an hour wiping slime off of Tom Riddle’s trophy. Even in (sort of) death, the Dark Lord still has the power to make people suffer. :)

* I think it says something about the insularity of the WW that it’s unthinkable for anyone to buy anything from a Muggle shop without being Muggle-born themselves.

* “Maybe he murdered Myrtle, that would’ve done everyone a favour…” *Chalks one up for Seer!Ron.*

* Harry keeps Riddle’s diary, even though he doesn’t know why. Even in the early books, the malign influence of authorial fiat is plain to see.

* Also, for all that Harry will bitch about Draco’s “infatuation with the Dark Arts” in HBP, it’s interesting to note that he seems to feel an instinctive bond with the evil Lord Voldemort, and doesn’t turn against him till he knows who he really is.

* Note, however, that Harry’s being initially taken in by Tom, before turning against him when he realises who he really is, is entirely different to Draco’s initially supporting Lord V, before turning against him when he realises what sort of man he really is.

* Ron’s dismissive of all that intellectualism stuff, until he needs Hermione to help him with his homework, in which case he’s all for it. Hypocrite.

* Ron’s disgusted to be surrounded by all that girly pink. See under “Gryffindors, insecure sexuality thereof”.

* I love those little Cupid!Dwarves, BTW.

* Yeah, because obviously The Boy Who Lived and the star player on the Gryffindor Quidditch team would only get one Valentine. *rolls eyes*

* Malfoy probably feels that Christmas has come early in this scene. :)

* Still, you’d’ve thought that a member of a House famed for its cunning would have known better than to needlessly antagonise authority figures. IITS, I guess.

* “Malfoy, who obviously hadn’t noticed the date on the front cover, and thought he had Harry’s own diary.” Christ, JKR, show, don’t tell, remember?

* I’m going to disagree with Harry and suggest that Ron does need to spend the whole of Charms belching slugs. Aside from being fun to watch, being on the receiving end of a few curses might stop all this wand-happy “Hex first, ask questions later” Gryffindorishness.

* Harry hasn’t yet hit puberty, so we’re spared the usual gushing descriptions of how handsome Tom is.

* Being a helpful old soul, Dippet pauses to have a long expositional conversation with Tom for the benefit of anybody who might be magically watching from fifty years in the future.

* DD’s “penetrating stare” is probably meant to show us how awesomely perceptive he is in guessing that it was really Tom all along. Unfortunately, it makes him look like an arrogant fool whose neurosis about sharing information leads him to recklessly endanger the lives of students under his care.

* So Hagrid’s just going to let that giant spider wander the corridors, then? It may not have killed anybody before, but it’s a miracle it didn’t kill anyone that night.