deathtocapslock | HBP Chapter Seven: "The Slug Club" (Reply)

* Ron and Hermione don’t seem interested in discussing Malfoy’s behaviour. On the one hand, this is quite reasonable – they don’t have much information, after all, so the chances of them reaching any reliable conclusions are nil – but on the other hand, it’s totally out-of-character. These are the people, after all, who were prepared to drug and impersonate three of Draco’s friends on the grounds that he didn’t like muggleborns and so might possibly be the Heir of Slytherin. What’s happened to make them change their views? The débâcle at the Ministry? But then we don’t really get any sense that the characters in this book are brooding over the death of Sirius. I’m going to chalk their newfound lack of curiosity up to the demands of the plot.

* Still, at least they’re not tiptoeing around Harry like they’re worried he’s going to explode, as in OOTP.

* Good job Ron tells us that Malfoy has the Hand of Glory, since the last time we saw it, back in COS, he most definitely didn’t have it, and Lucius specifically ruled out the prospect of getting it for him.

* Incidentally, do you think that JKR means us to understand that Malfoy acquired the Hand sometime since 1992, or did she just half-remember writing about it in COS and assume Malfoy must have had it? She apparently doesn’t re-read her own books, after all.

* So is Draco actually meant to be a Death Eater, or is it just Harry imagining things? The fact that the DEs are meant to be Voldemort’s élite fighters makes it unlikely that he’s let random sixteen-year-olds into their ranks, but I don’t think we’re given any definitive information one way or the other.

* Ginny’s idea of a joke is “be careful, there’s a lot of Phlegm around”. Harry, instead of wondering whether he really wants to shackle himself to such a person, instead smiles “I’ll be careful not to slip in it.” Well, if all else fails, they can spend their married lives bonding over their juvenile sense of humour.

* Incidentally, Harry is actually described as “smiling” those quoted words. I’m not sure how he does it. He could “say them, smiling”, but “smiling” them? Is he a secret ventriloquist or something?

* Fleur’s talking about colours for the bridesmaids’ dresses, which is probably meant to mark her out as vain and shallow. True heroes don’t care at all about such things, which is why the Weasleys’ tackiness is a sign of their great virtue.

* And it’s time to leave for the Hogwarts Express. Ron hurries forward, hoping Fleur will kiss him goodbye, but Ginny humiliates him by tripping him up. Erm… yay girl power?

* Two Aurors arrive, and Mrs. Weasley “seemed a little flustered by [their] austere efficiency.” Not surprising, really, given the general corruption and incompetence of wizarding government. I imagine meeting some genuinely efficient workers must be rather disorienting.

* Harry runs off to find a seat “[w]ithout waiting to consult his grim-faced Auror.” Eugh, what a spoilt brat. I bet the Aurors all hate being assigned to guard him.

* Mr. Weasley pooh-poohs Harry’s suggestion that Malfoy was buying something dark and dangerous, on the grounds that the Ministry searched his house recently and took away all the dark and dangerous stuff. Yeah, because it’s not like a family with known ties to a dark and dangerous wizard and a fondness for dark and dangerous objects and who’ve recently been visiting a shop which sells dark and dangerous magical items might possibly be interested in acquiring anything dark and dangerous. Don’t be ridiculous, Harry!

* The train pulls off, and Mrs. Weasley’s last words are to Harry, not Ron or Ginny. I wonder what her own children think of this.

* Everybody’s looking at Neville and Luna, although Neville says that’s just because they’re with Harry. *cringes at patheticness of it all*

* Rowling’s really overdoing it with the “Luna, teller of uncomfortable truths” thing here. The girl’s said two lines, and both times we’re told that this is the sort of brutal honesty she specialises in. Really, Rowling, there’s no need for this. If Luna does actually tell uncomfortable truths, we readers can notice it for ourselves; if she doesn’t, saying otherwise won’t make it so. “Show, don’t tell” is a rule of fiction writing for a reason, you know.

* “Had Voldemort chosen Neville, it would be Neville sitting opposite Harry bearing the lightning-shaped scar and the weight of the prophecy… or would it?” No, because Neville, as the only half-way competent character in the series, would have beaten Voldemort long ago, and sent him scurrying back to Albania, tail between his legs.

* Ron comes in and complains about Malfoy not fulfilling his prefect’s duties. Yeah, because Ron’s always been a model of conscientiousness and dedication to duty.

* Malfoy “had happily abused” his prefect powers “all the previous year”. Odd, because all I remember is that he took some house points off of Harry once. Oh, yeah, right, taking points off the Chosen One is itself an abuse of power. Duh.

* Harry smirks at the sight of Marrietta’s “odd formation of pimples still etched across her face”. OK, so there are at least three things I can see which are deeply wrong with this: first of all, Hermione’s spell caused long-term damage, rather than just going away after a couple of days; second of all, Harry’s a sadist who gets off on seeing people being permanently disfigured; and third, Rowling still remembers this subplot, so we can’t even assign the lack of a satisfactory resolution to authorial forgetfulness.

* Harry and Zabini don’t acknowledge each other, because “Gryffindor and Slytherin students loathed each other on principle.” Remember when Voldemort wanted to abolish the school Houses and we were all expected to go “Oh noes, what a terrible idea!” Well, it’s scenes like this which make me think he was on to something. Seriously, when your pupils hate each other too much to even acknowledge their existence, you might want to rethink your House system.

* Ginny starts grimacing at Harry from behind Slughorn’s back. Why is it that whenever she appears on-page I’m filled with an overwhelming desire to slap her?

* For a brilliant networker, Slughorn doesn’t seem to have much subtlety. Not seeing your famous uncle, Belby? No pies for you then!

* “Everyone here seemed to have been invited because they were connected to someone well-known or influential – everyone except Ginny.” And Harry, of course, but he’s far too modest to say so.

* I’d be careful about denigrating Harry if I were you, Zabini, else Harry’s pet attack harpy might come after you.

* What’s with all the Zacharias hate going around? You’d have thought that Ginny and Harry would respect him as a fellow member of the DA. Did they get a peek at the plot outline and see that he’ll end up pushing first-years out of his way to escape?

* And WTF is up with Slughorn giving her a place in his club? Is hexing somebody really the sort of thing which would ensure you a good career? Actually, in the wizarding world, it probably is.

* Harry’s method of sneaking into the compartment by shoving Zabini out of the way is pretty stupid. Good job Malfoy notices and makes him pay for his idiocy.

* Even Blaise finds Ginny pretty, and he’s really hard to please. See everybody, Ginny’s so hot, even people who hate her think so! She’s totally a fitting mate for the Chosen One!

* Reason # 147 why Draco would make a bad spy: he’s incapable of keeping his mouth shut about his secret mission.

* So do pupils just wear their robes over their normal clothes? I suppose they must do, but it must be rather hot and awkward with so many layers of clothing on.

* Look, JKR, I don’t know how they do things up in Scotland, but in most of the Western world, it’s quite common for boyfriends and girlfriends to hold each other’s hands. I think Pansy was “expecting” Draco to take hold of hers, rather than “hoping”.

* Draco stands on Harry’s nose and fingers. ZOMG how evil of him! A really virtuous person would be brave and gallant enough to use a full-on Crucio, not go pussyfooting around with broken noses and the like.

* Although I don’t quite get why Draco didn’t take Harry’s invisibility cloak for himself. I mean, yeah, leaving him on the train is a good prank, but not as good as getting a free invisibility cloak at the expense of your worst enemy.