CoS: Chapter Six
Dec. 30th, 2006 11:20 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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deathtocapslock*Hermione has Voyages with Vampires propped against a milk jug. Aw, she's just as dedicated when fangirling Lockhart.
*Ron gets his Howler, and feels faint. Interestingly, even Neville looks scared. Maybe he just has high levels of empathy?
*Wow, Harry tries to act like he can't hear Molly's voice. No love when the Weasleys want to yell at Ron, huh? That's real supportive of your best pal.
*Arthur facing an enquiry at work? No doubt he'll get out of it by "calling in favours" from an old friend.
*Hermione was talking to them now that she seemed to think they'd been punished enough. There's the Hermione we know and love!
*Lockhart's claiming he helped Sprout doctor the Whomping Willow. You think with all the fake credit he's got, he'd be wary of displaying any real knowledge (or lack thereof) and just smiling mysteriously. More believable.
*Lockhart's speech to Harry is really quite hilarious though. "Gave you a taste for publicity didn't I ? Gave you the bug. You got onto the front page of the paper and couldn't wait to do it again
Projection, much?
*As Sprout tells them to take earmuffs, there's a rush to get those that aren't pink and fluffy. Because only Slytherins do pink and fluffy, and nice Gryffindors are more manly, damn it!
*Wow, so these are twelve year old kids, and they get to handle Mandrakes: whose cries can kill you, and hang around something called a Venomous Tentacula? I'm beginning to wonder why there aren't more near-death experiences at Hogwarts....
*Oh, and what if some kid wasn't paying attention when Sprout ordered them to keep their earmuffs on at all times? Well, if his name was Draco Malfoy, it was all his fault! Teachers take no responsibility.
*Justin Finch-Fletchley comes of as very friendly here. Not only do the Trio not respond, but when he lands up in the hospital wing, the sympathy is all for Harry. How dare he make conversation with them before getting Petrified!
*And his name was down for Eton! Huh, no way are the Trio making friends with him now. They only mix with the yeomen to show how egalitarian they are.
*
*By the end of class, Harry, like everyone else, was sweaty, aching and covered with earth. Slashers: on your mark, get set, go!
*I understand Ron has to have a broken wand for plot purposes, but in a magic school, one year without a functional wand goes without remark from all the teachers? (insert your own joke about Ron "whacking his wand furiously" here)
*Hermione has outlined Lockhart's lessons in little hearts? I thought only vapid Slytherin girls did that!
*Aaah! Colin Creevey's entrance. I guess the part about his Dad being a milkman was supposed to show how Hogwarts had no class issues. Wonder if Justin feels offended that he and Colin are now on equal footing in the WW as Muggleborns...
*Although Colin and Justin are both Muggleborn, it is Colin who identifies with Harry, presumably due to his Muggle upbringing.
*The chances of Dennis and Colin both randomly becoming Muggleborns does slightly stretch the limits of imagination. JKR's Genetics work in very wonky ways indeed!
*"Signed photos, you're giving out signed photos, Potter?" Draco's all indignant. He thought he was the only one Harry gave them to.
*Colin's defending Harry so eagerly earns him the top Squeeing Fanboy honours. This, along with Draco's taunting wins the Academy Award for Slashiest Scene.
*Lockhart giving out PR advice to Harry is hilarious. Don't waste your time, man: Harry Potter's already got an agent to handle PR. His name's Albus Dumbledore.
*Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition is to rid the world of evil? I'm surprised Lockhart expresses sentiments like that with Snape on the loose just a few classrooms down.
*His ideal birthday gift would be harmony between all magic and non magic peoples? Well, there's good PR at last: align yourself with your boss! (Lockhart's popularity among the Slytherins must have suffered for that one)
*And Lockhart gives ten points to Gryffindor despite not knowing which house Hermione is in. I sincerely hope it's an all-Gryffindor class, or this is a glaring example of Gryff bias among the staff.
*For a house that prides itself on courage however, half the class is crouching under desks when the pixies are causing pandemonium. And making a dash for the exit.
*These are the same twelve year olds who were handling deadly plants a few hours ago. Consistency in the skill level or appropriate tasks for age is clearly too much to ask from a syllabus.
*Poor Neville, the pixies spot his Generic Loser Kid badge straightaway. He's in the air being held by his ears already!
*"He says he's done." ZOMG Ron predicted the plot twist in chapter six! He's a Seer! This is proof!
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Date: 2006-12-30 04:42 pm (UTC)Obviously, all in a day's work for a some kind of dictatorship government or could the WW be labeled a Plutocracy?
Anyway, Harry's love will save it. If it doesn't annoy him in any way.
For a house that prides itself on courage however, half the class is crouching under desks when the pixies are causing pandemonium. And making a dash for the exit.
Other students cringe on cue so that Harry/pals can be superior.
Poor Neville, the pixies spot his Generic Loser Kid badge straightaway. He's in the air being held by his ears already
Well, Harry has to look better than someone by comparison. Neville is there as his whipping boy. Harry = Love
no subject
Date: 2006-12-30 07:56 pm (UTC)*Wow, so these are twelve year old kids, and they get to handle Mandrakes: whose cries can kill you, and hang around something called a Venomous Tentacula? I'm beginning to wonder why there aren't more near-death experiences at Hogwarts....
Hogwarts should be like Sunnydale High, Obituaries in the school paper.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-30 08:01 pm (UTC)Why on earth is Molly airing that in public anyway?
*Wow, so these are twelve year old kids, and they get to handle Mandrakes: whose cries can kill you, and hang around something called a Venomous Tentacula? I'm beginning to wonder why there aren't more near-death experiences at Hogwarts....
Seriously. What is wrong with this school? I wouldn't let a child anywhere near it.
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Date: 2007-01-01 10:05 am (UTC)Oh, Ron offers to share that role! If Harry needs to look better Ron and Neville happily oblige.
no subject
Date: 2007-01-01 10:11 am (UTC)Also, see icon!
no subject
Date: 2007-01-01 10:14 am (UTC)Exactly, you think the Howler is embarrasing the family enough anyway. Anger can be conveyed through normal written letters, y'know.
But hey, that my silly Muggle opinion. *g*