PoA Chapter Eighteen
May. 28th, 2010 10:20 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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deathtocapslockI've been packing all day and totally forgot to post this like I planned until now!
Based on the title of this chapter, more interesting things to follow!
Sirius leaps on Ron’s broken leg. Sucks to be Ron. He doesn't even suffer in a woobie, sexy way.
Sirius says they can explain what's going on afterward he kills Peter. Apparently he hasn’t learned anything from Azkaban. Try explaining first just once, Sirius. You might like it.
Ron’s now been bitten a lot by Scabbers btw. Ron’s pretty tough to be able to still hold on to him. Rat bites are nasty.
It is kind of ironic that it’s Lupin telling Sirius to explain everything from the beginning. Almost as if he’s trying to stretch this out until the moon rises!
LOL! Ron actually tries to say “I’m off” and hobble out on his broken leg. Possibly the funniest thing Ron’s ever done. Yeah, we’ll meet you back at school, Ron.
Ron and Harry’s eyes meet. They both believe Sirius and Lupin are out of their minds because the story makes no sense. Um, yes it does make sense. You just saw that Sirius was the black dog here, you guys. Hermione really is the thinking brain dog, isn’t she?
There’s only been seven animagi in the entire century. It’s kind of cute that at this age it doesn’t occur to Hermione that that’s because nobody actually registers.
That door opening? Totally Snape entering the room. Severus Snape: Super Spy.
Despite the fact that Wizards grow up in a world where all sorts of magical things happen, they never seem any more prepared than a Muggle would be to deal with this stuff if somebody doesn’t walk them through it beforehand: But Scabbers can’t be a man, he’s a rat! Or: Oh, the door opened by itself as if someone was walking in? Couldn’t possibly be someone walking in. We didn’t see them!
Lupin says that “in those days” (when he was bitten) there was no cure. There’s no cure now either, Lupin, as far as we know. The Potion isn’t a cure.
Harry can see where this story is going. Well done, Harry! (Though I don't think Harry ever tells us where he thinks it's going. Knowing Harry maybe this is all leading up to Julie Christie, and not Petunia Dursley, being Harry's aunt.)
Lupin’s friends couldn’t help but notice he disappeared once a month. Too bad you didn’t have Harry for a friend, Remus. He could have easily not noticed. Or at least not deduce anything from it if he did. How are you and Ron doing on that “Hermione’s regularly three places at once” mystery you’ve been solving since September, Harry?
Lupin reminisces about how his friends let a werewolf wander around loose in a town, trusting that they’d be able to keep him in control. Next you can all share stories about those carefree nights drunk driving on the highway and the laughs you had when you’d almost hit someone. Hermione agrees with me, at least.
Lupin feels a little guilty about betraying Dumbledore’s trust. Don’t worry, Lupin. Once Dumbledore finds out he’ll make you pay for it. You didn’t really think all that spying on the werewolves was for nothing, did you? Or that Sirius really needed to live in the one house he hated more than anything?
Lupin explains he didn’t tell Dumbledore Sirius was an animagus because he was too cowardly. Though really he could have told him without his disapproval. He could tell him Sirius had become an animagus without telling him why. I just can’t help but cheer anyone on for keeping a secret from Dumbledore for any reason.
Lupin cleverly says that Snape’s been right about him all along in the exact company that will assure him that Snape is never right about anything.
Lupin makes the first reference to the trick Sirius pulled on Snape, which Sirius still says served Snape right. I miss this version of the Prank.
Wow. Speaking of versions of stories, Lupin throws in without having to that Snape didn’t like James because he was, I don’t know, jealous of how good he was at Quidditch. Does he just automatically cut Snape down and cover for James and Sirius here without thinking about it even though it’s not necessary for the story? Because there’s just no way Lupin could actually believe that.
Lupin continues to impress me with how smoothly he polishes up the story dishonestly on the fly. (Seriously, I love Lupin.) Not only did he take time to suggest Snape hated James over Quidditch but he adds that James pulled Snape back from the tunnel at “great risk to his own life.” Except James is an animagus, as we’ve already learned, and werewolves are only dangerous to people. James regularly went down the tunnel to see Lupin for fun. The only danger James was in was being outed as an animagus by Snape. But he sure sounds more heroic in this version of the story.
And this is where Snape reveals himself, and given what he’s just heard man he must be pissed.
Seriously, I know he won’t listen to reason here but he really did just hear Lupin give a completely self-serving speech about him and his buddies. Imagine Harry listening to a conversation where Draco talked about his time at school with Harry this way. He'd be even more angry than Snape for less reason.
Things that happen twice:
Peter’s an animagus, just like Black and McGonagall. Perhaps after a THIRD example Ron and Harry will catch on that sometimes animals turn out to actually be people.
Speaking of unregistered animagi: Rita Skeeter.
‘Member how Harry went to the Shrieking Shack in his invisibility cloak? Now Snape’s come to the Shack in Harry's invisibility cloak.
In fact, three books from now it’ll be Harry slipping in a door in his invisibility cloak, only Draco will actually notice. Draco, the only character besides Hermione known to ever deduce things or make a cunning plan—even if it’s usually with disastrous results.
I was half-joking when writing about Lupin’s life among the werewolves in HBP as Dumbledore’s punishment for betraying his trust but it actually makes total sense and is in fitting with Dumbledore’s character. Plus it’s a nicely eerie parallel for Voldemort amusing himself by giving Draco an assignment to make him suffer and fail in HBP!
Lupin didn’t tell Dumbledore Sirius was an animagus because he’s a coward. Because he’s a coward. Because he’s a coward. That'll come up a lot.
Lupin’s “Snape’s been right about me all along” is about as disingenuous as his later “Snape’s right to have me fired” will be shortly.
Lupin’s behavior really does make him seem like exactly the guy Snape thinks he is here, just as it did in the Marauders Map chapter.
It’s a gun. No it isn’t! It’s Chekov! No it isn’t!
The Prank
Well, this one’s obvious, isn’t it? The series can’t end until we get the real story…
Status: Um...fired, but it turns out it was not so much a real gun as an empty water pistol that Snape shot at his own pants to make an embarrassing stain.
Exploitation Filmmakers’ Credo
Animagus. It’s not that difficult a concept. Even when you heard the guy had died.
Foley Work
Come on, you know the door had to creak really loudly when Snape walked in, even if his footsteps were somehow muffled.
Informed Attributes
Lupin’s just spitting these out right and left without Harry questioning any of them.
James Bond Exposition Rule
That’s it, Remus, keep talking. Just a little longer before the moon’s up. Don’t leave out the part about Quidditch. Quidditch is really important to the story.
Misdirected Answering
The chapter’s over and we still haven’t gotten anywhere near how Peter’s alive and Sirius didn’t kill him or why Sirius suddenly isn’t a bad guy anymore.
The Stealth Monster Rule
See Work, Foley. Snape must be using some version of Muffliato as he comes up those stairs!
Jabootu Score: 6
Based on the title of this chapter, more interesting things to follow!
Sirius leaps on Ron’s broken leg. Sucks to be Ron. He doesn't even suffer in a woobie, sexy way.
Sirius says they can explain what's going on afterward he kills Peter. Apparently he hasn’t learned anything from Azkaban. Try explaining first just once, Sirius. You might like it.
Ron’s now been bitten a lot by Scabbers btw. Ron’s pretty tough to be able to still hold on to him. Rat bites are nasty.
It is kind of ironic that it’s Lupin telling Sirius to explain everything from the beginning. Almost as if he’s trying to stretch this out until the moon rises!
LOL! Ron actually tries to say “I’m off” and hobble out on his broken leg. Possibly the funniest thing Ron’s ever done. Yeah, we’ll meet you back at school, Ron.
Ron and Harry’s eyes meet. They both believe Sirius and Lupin are out of their minds because the story makes no sense. Um, yes it does make sense. You just saw that Sirius was the black dog here, you guys. Hermione really is the thinking brain dog, isn’t she?
There’s only been seven animagi in the entire century. It’s kind of cute that at this age it doesn’t occur to Hermione that that’s because nobody actually registers.
That door opening? Totally Snape entering the room. Severus Snape: Super Spy.
Despite the fact that Wizards grow up in a world where all sorts of magical things happen, they never seem any more prepared than a Muggle would be to deal with this stuff if somebody doesn’t walk them through it beforehand: But Scabbers can’t be a man, he’s a rat! Or: Oh, the door opened by itself as if someone was walking in? Couldn’t possibly be someone walking in. We didn’t see them!
Lupin says that “in those days” (when he was bitten) there was no cure. There’s no cure now either, Lupin, as far as we know. The Potion isn’t a cure.
Harry can see where this story is going. Well done, Harry! (Though I don't think Harry ever tells us where he thinks it's going. Knowing Harry maybe this is all leading up to Julie Christie, and not Petunia Dursley, being Harry's aunt.)
Lupin’s friends couldn’t help but notice he disappeared once a month. Too bad you didn’t have Harry for a friend, Remus. He could have easily not noticed. Or at least not deduce anything from it if he did. How are you and Ron doing on that “Hermione’s regularly three places at once” mystery you’ve been solving since September, Harry?
Lupin reminisces about how his friends let a werewolf wander around loose in a town, trusting that they’d be able to keep him in control. Next you can all share stories about those carefree nights drunk driving on the highway and the laughs you had when you’d almost hit someone. Hermione agrees with me, at least.
Lupin feels a little guilty about betraying Dumbledore’s trust. Don’t worry, Lupin. Once Dumbledore finds out he’ll make you pay for it. You didn’t really think all that spying on the werewolves was for nothing, did you? Or that Sirius really needed to live in the one house he hated more than anything?
Lupin explains he didn’t tell Dumbledore Sirius was an animagus because he was too cowardly. Though really he could have told him without his disapproval. He could tell him Sirius had become an animagus without telling him why. I just can’t help but cheer anyone on for keeping a secret from Dumbledore for any reason.
Lupin cleverly says that Snape’s been right about him all along in the exact company that will assure him that Snape is never right about anything.
Lupin makes the first reference to the trick Sirius pulled on Snape, which Sirius still says served Snape right. I miss this version of the Prank.
Wow. Speaking of versions of stories, Lupin throws in without having to that Snape didn’t like James because he was, I don’t know, jealous of how good he was at Quidditch. Does he just automatically cut Snape down and cover for James and Sirius here without thinking about it even though it’s not necessary for the story? Because there’s just no way Lupin could actually believe that.
Lupin continues to impress me with how smoothly he polishes up the story dishonestly on the fly. (Seriously, I love Lupin.) Not only did he take time to suggest Snape hated James over Quidditch but he adds that James pulled Snape back from the tunnel at “great risk to his own life.” Except James is an animagus, as we’ve already learned, and werewolves are only dangerous to people. James regularly went down the tunnel to see Lupin for fun. The only danger James was in was being outed as an animagus by Snape. But he sure sounds more heroic in this version of the story.
And this is where Snape reveals himself, and given what he’s just heard man he must be pissed.
Seriously, I know he won’t listen to reason here but he really did just hear Lupin give a completely self-serving speech about him and his buddies. Imagine Harry listening to a conversation where Draco talked about his time at school with Harry this way. He'd be even more angry than Snape for less reason.
Things that happen twice:
Peter’s an animagus, just like Black and McGonagall. Perhaps after a THIRD example Ron and Harry will catch on that sometimes animals turn out to actually be people.
Speaking of unregistered animagi: Rita Skeeter.
‘Member how Harry went to the Shrieking Shack in his invisibility cloak? Now Snape’s come to the Shack in Harry's invisibility cloak.
In fact, three books from now it’ll be Harry slipping in a door in his invisibility cloak, only Draco will actually notice. Draco, the only character besides Hermione known to ever deduce things or make a cunning plan—even if it’s usually with disastrous results.
I was half-joking when writing about Lupin’s life among the werewolves in HBP as Dumbledore’s punishment for betraying his trust but it actually makes total sense and is in fitting with Dumbledore’s character. Plus it’s a nicely eerie parallel for Voldemort amusing himself by giving Draco an assignment to make him suffer and fail in HBP!
Lupin didn’t tell Dumbledore Sirius was an animagus because he’s a coward. Because he’s a coward. Because he’s a coward. That'll come up a lot.
Lupin’s “Snape’s been right about me all along” is about as disingenuous as his later “Snape’s right to have me fired” will be shortly.
Lupin’s behavior really does make him seem like exactly the guy Snape thinks he is here, just as it did in the Marauders Map chapter.
It’s a gun. No it isn’t! It’s Chekov! No it isn’t!
The Prank
Well, this one’s obvious, isn’t it? The series can’t end until we get the real story…
Status: Um...fired, but it turns out it was not so much a real gun as an empty water pistol that Snape shot at his own pants to make an embarrassing stain.
Exploitation Filmmakers’ Credo
Animagus. It’s not that difficult a concept. Even when you heard the guy had died.
Foley Work
Come on, you know the door had to creak really loudly when Snape walked in, even if his footsteps were somehow muffled.
Informed Attributes
Lupin’s just spitting these out right and left without Harry questioning any of them.
James Bond Exposition Rule
That’s it, Remus, keep talking. Just a little longer before the moon’s up. Don’t leave out the part about Quidditch. Quidditch is really important to the story.
Misdirected Answering
The chapter’s over and we still haven’t gotten anywhere near how Peter’s alive and Sirius didn’t kill him or why Sirius suddenly isn’t a bad guy anymore.
The Stealth Monster Rule
See Work, Foley. Snape must be using some version of Muffliato as he comes up those stairs!
Jabootu Score: 6
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no subject
Date: 2010-05-30 07:37 am (UTC)It's also somewhat painful, because your comments just show how silly the plot was, and yet I read this book before and never realized how much fail was contained within. *shakes head* In my defense, I was a kid back then, I didn't know any better!
Sirius leaps on Ron’s broken leg. Sucks to be Ron. He doesn't even suffer in a woobie, sexy way.
Okay, but even as a kid, I still defied the Harry!filter and thought it was lousy of Sirius to beat up on Ron like that [these were the days when I liked Ron]. I know Sirius went on to be the wonderful cool godfather, but still- abusing Harry's friend, wtf? And SNAPE is painted as the bad guy? He might hate the kids but he still risks his life so often to save their miserable hides, but Sirius gets away with frakking breaking Ron's leg? O.o
It is kind of ironic that it’s Lupin telling Sirius to explain everything from the beginning. Almost as if he’s trying to stretch this out until the moon rises!
*facepalm* I KNOOOOW. How many years has he lived with this condition and he STILL doesn't remember to take precautions? And he has a frakking potion that'll make sure he's not a danger to anyone, but NOOO.
LOL! Ron actually tries to say “I’m off” and hobble out on his broken leg. Possibly the funniest thing Ron’s ever done.
Aww! Now I remember why I used to like Ron. I think this was the last book where he was actually a half-decent character. [Tell me you're going to spork GoF? And the other books? And then go back and do them all over again to entertain meeee?]
It’s kind of cute that at this age it doesn’t occur to Hermione that that’s because nobody actually registers.
Aww! How innocent she was back then!
And how bizarre that she never tries to become an Animagus. I know it's supposed to be hard and take years to master, but then, nobody was supposed to be able to cast a Patronus and then suddenly the whole DA was able to do it, so...hmm.
Despite the fact that Wizards grow up in a world where all sorts of magical things happen, they never seem any more prepared than a Muggle would be to deal with this stuff....Oh, the door opened by itself as if someone was walking in? Couldn’t possibly be someone walking in. We didn’t see them!
Too bad you didn’t have Harry for a friend, Remus. He could have easily not noticed. Or at least not deduce anything from it if he did. How are you and Ron doing on that “Hermione’s regularly three places at once” mystery you’ve been solving since September, Harry?
ILU! I laughed myself silly over that. You come up with all these witty, biting comments and the sad thing is how true they are! I just shake my head in disbelief at the fail. *headdeskwallfloor*
And now I'm going to stop quoting you, because you already know what you wrote. Just take it as read that this whole thing is bloody awesome. :D
Imagine Harry listening to a conversation where Draco talked about his time at school with Harry this way. He'd be even more angry than Snape for less reason.
The annoying thing is that if that situation you outlined had happened, Harry would've charged in, curses flying in every direction and we'd've been expected to cheer him on and rant about how those losers deserved what was coming to them, and all he would've been doing was acting out of wounded pride and not, you know, trying to save a bunch of kids from an escaped convict who had already demonstrated his criminal tendencies by hurting and abducting a defenseless kid!
PS. Do you have a link to this Jabootu score thing? I'm sure to annoy you, I think someone else already asked, but I'm curious... *hopeful eyes*
PPS. Packing all day? If you're going on a trip or moving somewhere, good luck to you and I hope it all goes smoothly. *squishes*
no subject
Date: 2010-05-30 03:42 pm (UTC)http://community.livejournal.com/deathtocapslock/104349.html#cutid1
Enjoy!
no subject
Date: 2010-06-01 12:31 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-05-30 05:56 pm (UTC)The annoying thing is that if that situation you outlined had happened, Harry would've charged in, curses flying in every direction and we'd've been expected to cheer him on and rant about how those losers deserved what was coming to them, and all he would've been doing was acting out of wounded pride and not, you know, trying to save a bunch of kids from an escaped convict who had already demonstrated his criminal tendencies by hurting and abducting a defenseless kid!
This reminds me that Potter often spied on others using the Invisibility Cloak, yet was rarely insulted or even mentioned, and rarely charged in, even in HBP on the train when Ginny was insulted! He effectively did nothing but stay out of the way. In fact, I'd say that when Potter had the Hallowed Invisibility Cloak on, which was so much of the time, he was remarkably passive. Maybe that's what hiding from Death is all about, keeping quiet. Although in this book, he overheard Malfoy dissing Hagrid in Hogsmeade, and he did lob mudballs at him from under cover.
no subject
Date: 2010-05-30 11:11 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-06-01 12:34 am (UTC)Although...it would be interesting to speculate that Dumbledore gave him that Cloak deliberately knowing that it would make Harry pliable and easier to manipulate with prolonged exposure to that Hallow...maybe he wanted it to warp Harry's personality and keep him passive and lackluster in order to pull on his strings and make that puppet do what he wanted, OOH.
I wouldn't put anything past that old bastard.
no subject
Date: 2010-06-01 03:03 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-06-01 12:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-05-31 01:42 am (UTC)Sirius's cruelty is really strange, isn't it? Because it's such a basic character trait--and something that Snape fans have always pointed out. Snape was a DE so clearly he had his own problems in that area, but there's a lot of examples w/in canon (where Snape's no longer a DE) where Snape is being surprisingly gentle and protective. Where as Sirius has moments like this.
I'm glad somebody offered the Jabootu link above! It's funny that I've been using it for so long it never even occurred to me that it's kind of gibberish if you don't have the key there...
I did move! The only not smooth part, as I ranted about above, is the stupid cable company but now I'm just happy to have found an internet connection and to not have to move anymore.
no subject
Date: 2010-06-01 12:54 am (UTC)I guess the first time round anything that seemed a little off seemed like it would be cleared up later.
I really expected more, I thought she was going to have this subtle exploration of different themes and just wow us all, but then she settled for the obvious, shallow plotlines and satisfying the lowest-common-denominator rather than going for more sophisticated themes. *sighs*
I suppose Sirius has the excuse of being in Azkaban for twelve or so years. *shrugs* That might explain his behavior, but not how the kids and everyone else are so eager to believe the best of him and be so welcoming and affectionate when he bloody well mauled Ron! Of course, given the Weasley family, they probably slapped him on the back and congratulated him on a great prank. *eyeroll*
Yay, everything worked out well, then! At least the internet's up and working, 'tis the most important thing! *hugs*
no subject
Date: 2010-05-31 03:17 am (UTC)I totally agree!