Philosopher's Stone Chapter One
Jul. 15th, 2010 12:09 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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deathtocapslock
PS Chapter One
*The Dursleys maintain they are perfectly normal although they come straight from a caricaturist’s sketch book and an uninspired caricaturist at that.
*Petunia pretends that she doesn’t have a Mary Sue character for a sister. Can’t blame her really. Anyone see the Sparklypoo comic?
*Dudley is having a tantrum, which won’t be his last. When Harry throws a tantrum at Umbridge in the far off future, that will count as “standing up to” her. Just as well he could learn how to stand up to people from Dud.
*McGonagall’s got nothing better to do than sit around on Privet Drive. Shouldn’t she be marking Transfiguration assignments or did she just give them all B minuses? (I know that is a suggestion worthy of the Dark Lord :p )
*I wonder how old Vernon is at this point in the timeline? I am guessing that we are supposed to infer that he is a lot older than Petunia since Petunia cannot be more than about 25 or 26. Hopefully it is not JKR’s dazzling mathematical skills at work...
*Vernon is glad that his sister is an even more grotesque caricature than he himself is. Marginally better than having a Mary Sue in the family!
*The little old wizard must have a lot of general good will for a member of the magical community. Most other wizards and all witches treat muggles like vermin. I would far rather be greeted in that fashion than by being given brain damage. I don't think that is so odd :)
*McGonagall’s still hanging around... I wonder what on Earth for. Why spy on the 2 Dimensional Dursleys?
*Vernon cannot bear to think about the Potters. He himself is too unimportant to enter their thoughts at all.
*Enter Albus Dumblesnore! I wonder how his nose is still broken when even Madam Pomfrey can mend bones in a second? Oh dear, continuity.
*The Put-Outer causes blackouts. Dumbledore has a flair for the dramatics. He should have said; “now it’s dark.”
*McGonagall’s miffed about everyone else showing a lack of discretion today although she herself has been a cat that acts almost like a human for the entire day.
*So it was around 1970 that Voldemort started displaying his sinister aptitude for doing nothing at all to the magical community?
*Has Voldemort really gone? Really McGonagall you should watch more muggle B Horror movies and then you would get an idea of how events are going to unfold in your reality.
*Dumblesnore’s offering around sherbert lemons could be seen as sinister. He’s working too hard on his feigned, jolly old grandfatherly manner.
*Yes Dumbledore, the taboo on saying Voldemort’s title is silly and inconsistent as well.
*McGonagall do you have to fawn over him so? I thought you would have more sense than that. Frankly, after what we learn in Deathly Hallows, it is surprising that Dumbledore did not have a Horcrux.
*I understand why McGonagall is crying. Everyone was dazzled by Lily Sue. It was in the script. On first reading this book, when I was 13, I got the impression that she had fancied young James, despite the age difference, since he was great at sports and a bully in the true Gryffindor fashion. A jock, as yanks on this site would put it?
*Dumbledore won’t tell you anything important McGonagall! He wouldn’t tell you even if it were crucial for you to know. He would still keep it a secret and take it with him to the grave.
*It’s disturbing how easily McGonagall capitulates to Dumbledore’s feeble argument in favour of his scheme to treat Harry as a lab monkey. What has the old coot done to her to wrap her mind around his little finger so?
*A letter? If Petunia were not such a feeble caricature of a middle class suburbanite I would be shocked at such a crass way of breaking the news of her sister’s death to her. Really Dumbledore seems to be making a bare minimum of effort to further Harry’s well being. Just writing a letter and abandoning Harry on the Dursley’s doorstep and leaving a batty old squib two streets away to keep an eye on him... Well at least it ensures he won’t become a pampered little prince.
*For dramatic effect, Dumbledore goes “I would trust Hagrid with my life.” Read; “Hagrid is my useless, but devoted pet and I regard him as such, whatever I may say that denounces prejudice against half giants.”
*Goodness what a beast Hagrid is...
*Nicely worked in a reference to Sirius Black. Don’t worry, Dumbledore has a scheme to get him out of the way. He won’t be interfering with Dumbledore’s Machiavellian scheme at little Harry’s expense. If he ever presents a threat to the scheme in future, he can be taken care of on a more permanent basis.
*Hagrid’s kissing Harry? Yuck. Is there raw meat clogged in that beard?
*Now that we know the Death Eaters greatest aspiration is to do nothing at all, it is obvious that they don’t really pose a threat to little Harry. The reasoning for putting him at the Dursleys because of the supposed ‘blood protection’ is obviously false. If they were out to get Harry they could have grabbed him right here as he is left on the muggle doorstep, before the Dursleys have taken him in. Perhaps Dumbledore is hoping that Harry might die young, so he won’t grow up to be an icon in the magical world, hence a potential rival to Dumblesnore. Dumping him on a doorstep in Surrey puts him in very real danger from foxes if nothing else. I am not being funny. Foxes do attack babies.
*I bet Dumbledore puts more energy into celebrating the fall of Voldemort than he did in making arrangements for Harry’s future.
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no subject
Date: 2010-07-15 01:27 am (UTC)I'm now imagining Dumbledore monitoring Privet Drive with his little silver instruments, growing increasingly frustrated that the foxes aren't going along with his cunning plan.
no subject
Date: 2010-07-15 07:04 am (UTC)Oh my goodness, why hadn't anyone ever thought of that before?
I remember the occasional story that had Vernon betray Harry, giving him over to the Death Eaters, but nothing like your idea here! Nice.
no subject
Date: 2010-07-15 07:11 am (UTC)Good question. Is it never explained, Dumbledore saying "thank you Minerva for _____"?
It can't be to spy on the Dursleys to see if they are appropriate as guardians for Harry, because it's clear that Dumbledore has already decided on that point - he ignores McGonagall's advice that they are the 'worst sort of muggles' (I think that's the quote?) - so why would he task her with watching them if he was going to disregard anything she says?
The Put-Outer causes blackouts.
And it miraculously guides one's aimless Apparition, although we won't see that until the very last book, and there's absolutely no clues as to this function, plus this property is completely different from putting out lights, so why combine the two purposes into one gizmo, unless it's to manufacture a totally artificial surprise/deus ex machina ... oh.
no subject
Date: 2010-07-15 02:42 pm (UTC)ROTFL! Just wanted to say this made me ROTFL a lot!
I had the same fear for young Harry on the doorstep (though my mind went first to raccoons, which don't exist in the UK). But given the choice between fairy tale dramatics vs. practicality (leaving the baby alone with a note on the doorstep versus sitting down and breaking the news etc.) I would have gone for fairy tale dramatics too.
no subject
Date: 2010-07-15 02:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-07-15 04:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-07-15 04:23 pm (UTC)15 month old kids
Date: 2010-07-15 04:39 pm (UTC)Furthermore it was the night of the first of November. Some English authors would describe early November as being wintry. It is the month where autumn changes to winter. It is a much bleaker month than October. In real life I would be disgusted at someone who would leave a baby outside on a November night.
no subject
Date: 2010-07-15 06:35 pm (UTC)Re: 15 month old kids
Date: 2010-07-15 07:24 pm (UTC)Re: 15 month old kids
Date: 2010-07-15 09:22 pm (UTC)Hagrid's mission
Date: 2010-07-15 09:50 pm (UTC)Re: Hagrid's mission
Date: 2010-07-15 10:02 pm (UTC)Re: Hagrid's mission
Date: 2010-07-15 10:09 pm (UTC)Re: Hagrid's mission
Date: 2010-07-15 10:18 pm (UTC)Re: 15 month old kids
Date: 2010-07-15 11:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-07-15 11:37 pm (UTC)First of all, Dumbledore didn't ask her to be there:
"Fancy seeing you here, Professor McGonagall."
...
"All day? When you could have been celebrating? ..."
And then we're told why she waited ALL DAY (!) to meet her headmaster:
It seemed that Professor McGonagall had reached the point she was most anxious to discuss, the real reason she had been waiting on a cold, hard wall all day, for neither as a cat nor as a woman had she fixed Dumbledore with such a piercing stare as she did now. It was plain that whatever "everyone" was saying, she was not going to believe it until Dumbledore told her it was true.
So Dumbledore didn't set her to watch the Dursleys. No, she just spent the whole day waiting for Dumbledore,who was doing who-knows-what in the mysterious 'missing 24 hours' that Rowling ignored.
no subject
Date: 2010-07-15 11:38 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-07-16 02:21 am (UTC)I could see Vernon handing Harry over, and as much as I agree with Harry that Vernon's an ass, I'd also understand - after your nephew's friends have almost killed your son and threatened your whole family, it would look like a good idea.
Re: 15 month old kids
Date: 2010-07-16 08:07 pm (UTC)Hey, it's Harry! Doing nothing is his special gift, until Dumbledore drags a clue in front of him.
Re: Hagrid's mission
Date: 2010-07-16 09:00 pm (UTC)Re: Hagrid's mission
Date: 2010-07-16 11:03 pm (UTC)My own theory, which I'm rather fond of, is that something went so completely wrong that the Ministry authorized a time adjustment. They did a good job of it, but a few glitches and anomolies always manage to slip through.
no subject
Date: 2010-07-16 11:17 pm (UTC)They would have been free to 'pursue happiness' earlier even when Voldemort was around, too; just ignore the 'smooth talking sect leader' (!).
Besides, didn't they torture the Longbottoms into insanity right *after* Voldemort's first demise, in retribution? Thus showing that Harry might have been in real danger?
no subject
Date: 2010-07-16 11:51 pm (UTC)But even if the DEs wanted to leave him alone, Voldemort had no such excuse starting in GoF. He could order Pettigrew to sneak in as a rat and kill the Dursleys in their sleep, or Apparate there after the graveyard fiasco to make sure Harry had no home to return to, or any number of things, and then kill Harry at his leisure.
But elaborate plots involving tournaments and polyjuice are so much more fun... apparently.
Re: Hagrid's mission
Date: 2010-07-16 11:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-07-17 12:01 pm (UTC)Heh, remember Dumbledore's a Gryffindor! They'd rather scar than fix wounds like pansies - makes them look more bad-ass (see also, Bill, Moody and Harry himself.)
no subject
Date: 2010-07-17 01:12 pm (UTC)Sounds like it to me! Especially the 'unforgivables' part.
But like I said, if the Death Eaters went hunting for the Longbottom baby *after* their dark lord's demise then there was an excellent chance they'd go looking for Harry as well.
Dumblesnore
Date: 2010-07-17 01:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-07-17 03:11 pm (UTC)Re: Hagrid's mission
Date: 2010-07-17 07:28 pm (UTC)So they auththorized a time adjustment. Just wipe out that whole day and get the kid *out* of the ww and hide him where he wouldn't be a temptation.
Hey, it's Harry!
Date: 2010-07-18 02:38 pm (UTC)Minerva's capitulation
Date: 2010-07-18 02:45 pm (UTC)My newest theory is, besides the Confundus Charm which makes the victim believe a specific idea, however illogical, wizards also have a charm to make a victim blindly swallow everything a specific person says. It would explain a lot, wouldn't it?
And it was awfully dark on that brick wall on Privet Drive, and Minerva mostly was looking away from Dumbledore (pretending casual disinterest) while they talked....
no subject
Date: 2010-07-18 09:35 pm (UTC)Even if every single one of them wanted Voldemort gone for good, that's still a good reason to snatch Harry - if they can figure out what happened, maybe they can reassure themselves that Voldemort really is gone. And then kill the baby so he can't mess with any plans they might make themselves, whether by magical means or by growing up to go after anyone who was ever connected with Voldemort, or what have you. Or, if any of them figure out that Harry's a Horcrux - not impossible - to make it harder for Voldemort to return.
no subject
Date: 2010-07-18 09:45 pm (UTC)Re: 15 month old kids
Date: 2010-07-19 02:58 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-07-19 06:47 pm (UTC)Re: Hagrid's mission
Date: 2010-07-31 01:30 am (UTC)In any case, while Minerva waited all day, Albus knew not to show up at 4PD before nighttime.
no subject
Date: 2010-08-02 06:12 pm (UTC)See here
Section: Rumours
The Lestranges were sent after Neville to kill him
No, they weren’t, they were very definitely sent after Neville’s parents. I can’t say too much about this because it touches too closely on the prophecy and how many people knew about it, but the Lestranges were not in on the secret.
Also, did they think Voldemort simply disappeared or did they think Aurors such as Frank Longbottom had him captive somewhere and the Ministry was hiding this from the public?
no subject
Date: 2010-08-02 06:14 pm (UTC)Also, his real name is Tom Riddle. Why not share this little tidbit that might demystify the guy to the wizarding public?