[identity profile] for-diddled.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] deathtocapslock
* AKA “The chapter where Voldemort finally gets off his backside and does something for once”.

* Ron “thoroughly enjoyed being patted on the back by every Gryffindor who walked past his chair,” showing how inferior he is to Harry, who doesn’t enjoy his status as the Chosen One. No, Harry just accepts it as part of the natural order of things.

* Harry grins when Ron reminds him of James, rather than feeling an unpleasant lurch in his stomach, so I take it he’s now fine with the idea of his father hexing Snape.

* Harry “bitterly” suggests that Cho cried when she lost the match. I’m kind of surprised at this, because it suggests that Harry’s actually upset that their relationship ended, when I thought he was just using her for practice and then casting her aside when he gets tired of her, which is the usual way relationships go in these books.

* Also, note the association with Cho and crying again. And she’s cried, what, two times when she was with Harry, out of however many times they met over the course of the year? That hardly seems over-the-top for somebody who’s still grieving for their murdered boyfriend.

* No, says Hermione, they can’t back out of looking after Grawp, because they promised Hagrid. Really, though, they ought to break their promise. After all, Hagrid only got them to promise by emotionally blackmailing them and refusing to tell what exactly they were getting themselves into; it’s not like his behaviour was a model of honesty.

* Also, note how Hermione’s development into a full-fledged heroine isn’t completed yet. A true member of the good side would know that breaking promises is perfectly justified – provided it’s for the greater good, of course.

* Eight or nine hours a day seems like quite a lot of revision to do on top of your normal lessons. Or have all the professors started doing revision classes instead of teaching their pupils new material, and Ernie’s including them in his total?

* Probably not what JKR would want me to think, but does anyone else find Draco’s attempts to psyche out Harry totally adorable?

* I’m surprised Hermione isn’t taking any of the mind-improving substances herself. It’s the sort of thing you’d expect her to do. Or maybe she is, and confiscating everyone else’s stuff is part of her cunning plan to make sure that nobody can beat her in OWLs.

* Any idea what “Theory of Charms” would involve? Or theory of anything, for that matter. As far as we see, it’s just a matter of waving your wand and saying a couple of pseudo-Latinate words.

* Even for a perfectionist swot, Hermione’s reaction upon seeing the examiners seems a bit OTT.

* Apparently Dumbledore “did things with a wand I’d never seen before.” Mind, meet gutter.

* So “Theory of Charms” turns out to mean “Describing what you do to cast basic first-year spells.” That seems a little disappointing, somehow.

* In reality, I’d have thought that Ron would be able to come up with a more recent example of Hermione doing well than a test they did at the end of their first year. Sort of like how Harry should have remembered more about Neville than the Remembrall incident. This sort of thing is quite annoying because it looks like there’s no real world off the page – the only time Neville did anything plot-relevant was in Book 1, so that’s the only thing Harry remembers about him. It makes it seem as if nothing happens that we aren’t told about directly.

* On a side note, “Parkinson, Pansy – Patil, Padma – Patil, Parvati – Potter, Harry” is bad and confusing punctuation. It ought to be “Parkinson, Pansy; Patil, Padma; Patil, Parvati; Potter, Harry”.

* “‘Potter, is it?’ said Professor Tofty... ‘The famous Potter?’” Of course, I’m sure Harry’s celebrity status won’t give him any unfair advantage. *rolls eyes*

* Making eggcups do cartwheels is such a weird thing to do, I think I’d find it difficult to be nervous if somebody were examining me. Maybe it just starts to seem mundane after you do it enough times.

* Harry messes up his Colour-Change Charm. Fortunately Ron messed up even worse, so our hero’s still got somebody he can feel superior to. Phew!

* Harry performs “counter-jinxes” for his DADA exam. To me, a “counter-jinx” sounds like something that ought to reverse the effects of a jinx, but given that all the spells we’ve seen him learn are offensive (with the possible exceptions of Expelliarmus, Protego and Expecto Patronum), I’m going to assume that Slinkhard was right, and that “counter-jinx” really is just a word people use to make their jinxes seem more acceptable.

* Or maybe it just conjugates irregularly: I counter-jinx, you jinx.

* Of course, nobody thinks it at all unfair that Harry gets a chance to show off with his Patronus, and no-one else can earn extra marks this way. Fun idea: imagine what the characters’ reactions would be if it had been Malfoy who was offered the chance to gain extra credit, not Harry.

* Anybody know if ehwaz and eihwaz are actual ancient words, or did JKR just make up some foreign-sounding mumbo-jumbo to use?

* “Oh, you’re so naïve sometimes, Harry. You really think Umbridge will wait for proof?” Well, Hermione, she hasn’t done anything so far, despite Hagrid’s towering incompetence, and despite already having fired somebody else. So far, her actions towards him seem quite fair.

* Trying to provoke an animal into going mad and possibly attacking you seems a rather dangerous way of identifying Knarls. Isn’t there a safer method? Or would that be considered too cowardly for the WW?

* Harry messes up Divination. Once again, however, Ron messes up even worse. Can’t have Harry feeling inferior at anything!
* So if Arithmancy and Divination are at the same time, what happens to pupils who take both subjects? Are they provided with Time-Turners, or something?

* If the Astronomy exam lasts for several hours, surely the moon and stars would move a fair bit between the beginning of the exam and the end? So how are you meant to accurately map their positions over such a long period of time?

* A bit unclear here who started the fight. Personally I’m inclined to think it was Hagrid. Going into a rage and attacking people seems quite IC for him. Umbridge is less overtly confrontational with her viciousness.

* Apparently Hagrid has done “nothing” to warrant such an attack. Well, nothing apart from seriously injuring a ministry employee, that is.

* Personally I think the figures were quite reasonable to stun McGonagall. Rushing to the aid of somebody who’s attacking you makes it look like you’re planning on joining in the attack yourself.

* Apparently Umbridge is “evil” for “trying to sneak up on Hagrid in the dead of night”. Well, if by “trying to sneak up on Hagrid” you mean “knocking on his front door”.

* Out-universe JKR was presumably trying to go for the whole Gestapo dawn raid type vibe here. In-universe, Umbridge probably wanted to avoid another scene when she fired one of the teachers. Given that Hagrid attacks them, she was probably right to do so.

* Apparently Hagrid’s teaching has been “much better this year”. So much better, in fact, that all his students will drop COMC at the end of this book.

* “Umbridge hates part-humans” is of course one of the many informed attributes in this series. We’re told that she uses her position to try and oppress anybody who’s not “pure” enough, but we see her putting two incompetent teachers on probation, only one of whom is part-human. We also see her giving both the teachers on probation plenty of time to improve, and she ends up firing the human before the half-giant. We also see that she makes no overt moves against the competent part-goblin Flitwick, or the centaur Firenze. It’s almost as if she were concerned with low teaching standards rather than the blood status of the teachers…

* “‘I just hope Professor McGonagall’s alright,’ said Lavender tearfully.” How nice of her to show such compassion. It’s a shame it doesn’t extend to Montague, who I think is still in the hospital wing unable to speak.

* Would Liechtenstein really be important enough in the international wizarding community for its opposition to the ICW to be noteworthy?

* Good job Voldemort waited till History of Magic before giving Harry his vision, so that (a) he only got disrupted in an exam Harry was never going to pass anyway, and (b) Harry had a face-saving excuse for not passing. Say what you want about the Dark Lord, he’s very considerate like that.

* “Lord Voldemort is waiting… and he cannot wait all day. He has to go to the amateur dramatics society to audition for the villain role in their upcoming pantomime. His acting coach has suggested he try method acting and always refer to himself in the third person, but this makes him feel ridiculous and silly, and therefore bad-tempered.”

Date: 2011-12-09 04:03 pm (UTC)
kahran042: (Default)
From: [personal profile] kahran042
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eihwaz

Also, whatever did happen to Sally-Anne Perks after the Sorting in the first book?

Missing girls

Date: 2011-12-09 07:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] urbanman1984.livejournal.com
If I were to give it a lot more thought than JKR ever did, I would hazard a guess that she had left Hogwarts, but we could make up any reason. Perhaps she wanted to leave, her parents wanted to homeschool her instead or send her to a different school. The accomplished fanfiction author: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/352534/Arsinoe_de_Blassenville has suggested the possibilities that she could have left ballet school as in her Best Revenge fanfiction. The author also posed the possibilities in her Golden Age fanfiction that she could have become one of Hogwarts teenage pregnancies or even the more sinister possibility of her being on their list of suicides...



I expect JKR just forgot she had included that name in the original Sorting list.

Date: 2011-12-09 08:00 pm (UTC)
From: [personal profile] oryx_leucoryx
My fanwank is that Sally-Anne was not that good with Charms, so she decided to skip that exam and concentrate her efforts where she expected to pass. (I know Harry took Divination and History which he expected to fail, but that doesn't mean everyone has to do that.)

In my head-canon to be a 'qualified wizard' (as Arthur is referred to in GOF) one has to pass at least one of the OWLs requiring control of one's wand - Charms, Transfiguration or DADA. Because I don't see any other logical reason why children aren't allowed to use wands outside school but reaching a certain age makes it OK. My preferred interpretation is that the main purpose of basic Hogwarts education is to teach kids control of their magic, so 11 year-olds have wands for the purpose of learning, passing the OWL is evidence that learning was achieved and then once one reaches majority one gets to use the wand at one's judgment. (Additional OWLs are for qualifications for further learning and jobs.) So forfeiting the Charms OWL might be risky, unless Sally-Anne was expecting to do rather well in Transfiguration or DADA. But perhaps she thought the extra study time gained by dropping Charms would serve her well in a subject that was more important for her goals.

Golden Age

Date: 2011-12-09 10:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] urbanman1984.livejournal.com
I think the creepy picture that the Golden Age depicts better fits the kind of world we see in the series than your fanwank does. JKR was never interested in details about the school work. JKR strongly gives the impression of having been an inept and sullen pupil back in the day. She was like Hermione with her intellect removed.

If Sally-Anne were cute, like in Dragonpox or the Best Revenge, I would say more likely she had to leave due to teenage pregnancy, if she were plainer, more likely she was lost to the terrible end result of relentless bullying :'(

Date: 2011-12-11 09:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] xerox78.livejournal.com
Maybe she got eaten by one of Hagrid's creatures.

Date: 2011-12-12 12:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] urbanman1984.livejournal.com
I wonder how many have been lost to the acromantulas.

Date: 2011-12-12 04:33 pm (UTC)
sunnyskywalker: Young Beru Lars from Attack of the Clones; text "Sunnyskywalker" (spandex jackets)
From: [personal profile] sunnyskywalker
Silly, Aragog wouldn't hurt anyone who didn't deserve it! I'm sure it was just a few Slytherins here and there.

Maybe Sally-Anne wandered into the third-floor corridor first year and died a terrible death, just like Dumbledore warned them might happen. The Trio and Neville escaped because they have main character protection.

Date: 2011-12-12 07:43 pm (UTC)
From: [personal profile] oryx_leucoryx
She may have just as well been eaten by Remus, bludgeoned by Grawp or burnt by a skrewt. Or accidentally kissed by a dementor.

Date: 2011-12-22 04:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] charlottehywd.livejournal.com
Is anyone else surprised by the fact that apparently the parents of these children take it in stride that their offspring might die horribly at school due to its lack of any sort of safety precautions? Or maybe only the muggle parents complained, since they weren't gifted with inborn sociopathy magic.

Date: 2011-12-23 07:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] karentheunicorn.livejournal.com
Robot Chicken made fun of the dangers at Hogwarts (wow, LJ has changed...hope the video link I added below works)

Date: 2011-12-23 02:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] charlottehywd.livejournal.com
Wow, that was really disturbing, but kind of true, right?

Date: 2011-12-25 04:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] karentheunicorn.livejournal.com
Yea disturbing but funny, seems pretty relevant to the discussion to. I love the Robot Chicken adult swim stuff I can't help it.

It's like trying to teach cats to disarm landminds.

Potter you fool!!

Aragog

Date: 2011-12-12 08:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] urbanman1984.livejournal.com
Aragog wouldn't, but the other spiders would even have attacked Harry! And they would have eaten Hagrid too, but most unfortunately failed. Certainly they would have had no inhibitions about eating any girl who wondered willingly into their midst.

Date: 2011-12-10 12:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] oneandthetruth.livejournal.com
Ron “thoroughly enjoyed being patted on the back by every Gryffindor who walked past his chair,” showing how inferior he is to Harry, who doesn’t enjoy his status as the Chosen One. No, Harry just accepts it as part of the natural order of things.

That's the proof of how inherently noble he is. He accepts the adoration and subservience of others as his due.

Also, note the association with Cho and crying again. And she’s cried, what, two times when she was with Harry, out of however many times they met over the course of the year? That hardly seems over-the-top for somebody who’s still grieving for their murdered boyfriend.

Nonsense! She should have just had one good, 20-minute cry, and then gotten over it. That's what JKR did when her mother died.

Really, though, they ought to break their promise. After all, Hagrid only got them to promise by emotionally blackmailing them and refusing to tell what exactly they were getting themselves into; it’s not like his behaviour was a model of honesty.Or maybe she is, and confiscating everyone else’s stuff is part of her cunning plan to make sure that nobody can beat her in OWLs.

You--you're not suggesting Hermione is a Slytherin are you? *gasp* Everybody knows Gryffindors aren't cunning!

Apparently Dumbledore “did things with a wand I’d never seen before.” Mind, meet gutter.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought that sounded vaguely dirty. :D

Making eggcups do cartwheels is such a weird thing to do, I think I’d find it difficult to be nervous if somebody were examining me. Maybe it just starts to seem mundane after you do it enough times.

People have described Hogwarts as being a trade school, but that's not really true. At trade schools, you actually learn a valuable skill you can use to get a good-paying job. Unless you're planning on joining the circus, I can't see how making dishes do gymnastics would be a marketable skill.

Fun idea: imagine what the characters’ reactions would be if it had been Malfoy who was offered the chance to gain extra credit, not Harry.

Fanfic time! :D

Trying to provoke an animal into going mad and possibly attacking you seems a rather dangerous way of identifying Knarls.

Not to mention that when Draco accidentally did this with Buckbeak, he was condemned as a moron who was asking to get attacked.

Harry messes up Divination. Once again, however, Ron messes up even worse.

Yet we're apparently supposed to be shocked, shocked, in DH when the locket preys on Ron's feelings of inferiority to Harry.

Apparently Umbridge is “evil” for “trying to sneak up on Hagrid in the dead of night”. Well, if by “trying to sneak up on Hagrid” you mean “knocking on his front door”.

Hey, that's what Voldemort did to the Potters. You're not suggesting he wasn't evil, are you?

Date: 2011-12-10 01:04 am (UTC)
sunnyskywalker: Young Beru Lars from Attack of the Clones; text "Sunnyskywalker" (spandex jackets)
From: [personal profile] sunnyskywalker
You really have to wonder why, if Voldemort was all that, he couldn't have just Apparated in right past their wards instead of knocking. Now that might have given James a good reason to be at least a few steps from his wand, if he'd just set it down while doing something and then suddenly bam! Voldemort's in the living room.

Date: 2011-12-10 01:35 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] danajsparks.livejournal.com
I don't think Voldemort knocked. He just blasted the door open.

Date: 2011-12-10 01:49 am (UTC)
sunnyskywalker: Young Beru Lars from Attack of the Clones; text "Sunnyskywalker" (spandex jackets)
From: [personal profile] sunnyskywalker
Still, it's not all that impressive, considering his reputation. Harry probably could have done it. In an early year of his schooling. Suddenly appearing in a house warded against Apparition would be scary.

Date: 2011-12-22 04:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] charlottehywd.livejournal.com
I like that a lot. It needs to be added to the list of things that would make Voldemort a more effective villain. Is there a list like that, btw? There ought to be. ;-)

Date: 2011-12-10 03:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mmmarcusz.livejournal.com
* In reality, I’d have thought that Ron would be able to come up with a more recent example of Hermione doing well than a test they did at the end of their first year. Sort of like how Harry should have remembered more about Neville than the Remembrall incident. This sort of thing is quite annoying because it looks like there’s no real world off the page – the only time Neville did anything plot-relevant was in Book 1, so that’s the only thing Harry remembers about him. It makes it seem as if nothing happens that we aren’t told about directly.

The same goes for Cho crying. She's only appeared on the page a couple of times and cried twice, but that's enough for her to be a crybaby.

* If the Astronomy exam lasts for several hours, surely the moon and stars would move a fair bit between the beginning of the exam and the end? So how are you meant to accurately map their positions over such a long period of time?

You'd track their position on an imaginary hemisphere, as if you were at the North Pole, and draw an arc to show the moon's path.

* Good job Voldemort waited till History of Magic before giving Harry his vision, so that (a) he only got disrupted in an exam Harry was never going to pass anyway, and (b) Harry had a face-saving excuse for not passing. Say what you want about the Dark Lord, he’s very considerate like that.

His last words on Quirrell's head were, "give Harry the House Cup..."

Date: 2011-12-10 04:59 pm (UTC)
From: [personal profile] oryx_leucoryx
Harry grins when Ron reminds him of James, rather than feeling an unpleasant lurch in his stomach, so I take it he’s now fine with the idea of his father hexing Snape.

He was feeling uneasy at first, and it was Ron reminding him of James that made everything right. And from this moment on James' use of Levicorpus is a case of a good guy having fun, even when Hermione points out the similarity with the DEs at the QWC. Did Harry seriously believe that James was a not-too-popular, lacking-in-confidence kid like Ron, but who finally managed to achieve a better state of well-being through an achievement in Quidditch?

In reality, I’d have thought that Ron would be able to come up with a more recent example of Hermione doing well than a test they did at the end of their first year. Sort of like how Harry should have remembered more about Neville than the Remembrall incident. This sort of thing is quite annoying because it looks like there’s no real world off the page – the only time Neville did anything plot-relevant was in Book 1, so that’s the only thing Harry remembers about him. It makes it seem as if nothing happens that we aren’t told about directly.


Hey, Neville's forgetting the passwords was plot-significant in POA! Anyway, Hermione got 120% only on one Charms test ever. Maybe Filius learned better after that.

If the Astronomy exam lasts for several hours, surely the moon and stars would move a fair bit between the beginning of the exam and the end? So how are you meant to accurately map their positions over such a long period of time?

And what makes them think silvery moonlight makes it a perfect night for star-gazing? (Somewhere there are essays about all the astronomy mistakes in the series.)

Would Liechtenstein really be important enough in the international wizarding community for its opposition to the ICW to be noteworthy?

Maybe they have a bank that is more important than Gringotts. Or maybe in Wizarding geography Lichtenstein is an empire controlling a huge chunk of Europe.

Date: 2011-12-13 09:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] granatapfelrot.livejournal.com
it was Ron reminding him of James that made everything right.
And it was Ron's hair rumbling of all things, Harry used to console himself with. I swear both of those green-eyed ninnies thought it a bigger sin, that James did pose stupidly with his hair, than his bullying attack. And if that doesn't say everything anybody needs to know about Lily and Harry, I don't know what does.
And by now I'm sure, Rowling has a weird hair fetish. I searched for the word in the SWM chapter and it highlighted like Paris by night. Why try for real characterization, when there's Good hair and Bad hair...

Date: 2011-12-22 04:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] charlottehywd.livejournal.com
May I ask how exactly hair rumbles? It swishes, sure, but rumbles? Or is that a property magical peoples' hair?

Date: 2012-01-05 03:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] granatapfelrot.livejournal.com
LOL. Now this is embarrassing. I meant, He 'rumples' it.
That's what I get for trusting spell check to much.
But at least I got a funny image of James Potter with a thunderstorm on his head(magical hair, indeed:)) out of it, when I looked it up. No wonder you were confused.
Sorry. My English is not that stellar.

Date: 2012-01-05 04:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] charlottehywd.livejournal.com
Ah, sorry. I should have caught that. I still like the rumbling hair though. ;-)
(deleted comment)

Date: 2012-01-10 03:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] granatapfelrot.livejournal.com
That's true. What a confusion:)

Date: 2012-01-10 06:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] majorjune.livejournal.com
And back in the 1920s and 1930s, many automobile models had what was called a "Rumble Seat", basically a trunk (I think it's called "boot" by the British?) in the back of the car that when you lifted the hood (bonnet to the Brits) revealed a very small seat that could barely hold two people.

Because of the tight squeeze and the privacy the lifted hood provided, rumble seats got the reputation for being the seat where "sweethearts" would sit and surreptiously make out...

Of course you were a sitting duck in a rear-end collision, and since you were exposed to the open air you'd be the first and farthest to be thrown in any other sort of collision, which helped in the demise of the rumble seat. :-P

Date: 2012-01-11 08:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] granatapfelrot.livejournal.com
Awesome, how much I'm learning here. Thanks, majorjune for explaining this.

Date: 2011-12-13 09:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] granatapfelrot.livejournal.com
So if Arithmancy and Divination are at the same time, what happens to pupils who take both subjects
Simple. That doesn't happen.
Arithmancy is only for geniuses like Hermione.
Divination is for shallow, giggling girls like Lavender and Parvati; underachiever like Ron; or for Harry of course, for whom, as the Chosen One, education doesn't matter and everybody is only going through the motions anyway.

Date: 2011-12-22 04:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] charlottehywd.livejournal.com
Any idea what “Theory of Charms” would involve? Or theory of anything, for that matter. As far as we see, it’s just a matter of waving your wand and saying a couple of pseudo-Latinate words

See, this is one of the things that bothers me about the Hogwarts curriculum. I mean, there isn't really any intelligence required to be good at magic. You just have to say the right words and wave your wand in the right way. There is no reason to learn why or how magic works or what it runs on, let alone how people learned how to harness it. Perhaps this is because magic runs off something terrible like the souls of children or something and wizards don't want to deal with it? (this would make for an interesting twist, btw). Or maybe JKR doesn't understand how schooling should work. Which is pretty strange, considering that this is a school story and she spent some time as a teacher.

Making eggcups do cartwheels is such a weird thing to do, I think I’d find it difficult to be nervous if somebody were examining me.

You know, when you think of it, most of the things that they are taught to do in class are totally pointless other than to give the story a quirky, eccentric vibe. I wonder if any of the students have ever thought to ask why they needed to know something like this. In a related vein, anyone want to guess what the answer would be?

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