PS Chapter Eight

[sassafras-root.livejournal.com]

*Yay, it’s the chapter where Snape appears. Ahem. Sorry.

*Harry doesn’t appreciate everyone staring at him. He hates his fame and is just a poor little underdog. As if he wouldn’t be annoyed if people found other things to discuss then his love life.

*Maybe I just don’t appreciate the whimsical wonder of the wizarding world, but I think that finding your classes in a large castle is hard enough without the moving staircases and walls pretending to be doors. Sometimes the magic that’s supposed to be fun (like moving pictures-how does one do photography as an art if the damn things always moving?) but it just seems unnecessary. Or maybe my soul is just to mundane to appreciate it.

*Another plus for Muggle school, no poltergeist throwing crap at you when you’re already late. It’s just training for later life!

*I love how Professor Sprout is a “dumpy” little witch (of course she’s head of Hufflepuff, they're all losers! *eyeroll*) but Vernon calling Molly Weasley that is a sing of what a jerk he is.

*Hah, I love Harry thinking that McGonagall doesn’t favor Gryffindor just because she gave them a lot of homework. Snape would never do that to his Slytherins, he clearly tucks them in every night!

*Of course McGonagall doesn’t favor the Gryffindors, she’s so fair and unbiased, always! Didn’t she go easy on the homework in OotP so that the Quidditch Cup would stay in her office?

*Why do the owls have to deliver the letters at breakfast? JKR neglects to mention that owls leave behind more than letters. Oh dear, biology.

*The Potions lesson was the worse thing that happened to Harry so far, poor woobie. *tear*

*Snape’s a mean teacher, based off of one JKR had. Such sweet revenge on him, right, inspiring a character who would become very popular.

*Zomg, Draco, Crabbe and Goyle are snickering at Harry! Bastards. Harry would never laugh at another person’s expense!

*Okay, I’m going to be a huge dork here and say that I like Snape’s speech. He’s such a Potions nerd.

*Ugh, Hermione’s so annoying here. Sucks not knowing the answer and being put on the spot, he doesn’t need Hermione stretching her hand to the ceiling here. Though she’s even worse in HBP, answering every damn question in Potions class.

*Harry’s so witty here, isn’t he? Glad to see his sharp retorts haven’t changed.

*I can’t read the asphodel/wormwood part now without thinking of the Snape/Lily theories centered around it. Argh, SS/LE! *shudders violently*

*Snape likes Draco, therefore he must be even more of a jerk! They probably make plans on how to make Harry’s life miserable. I’m sure Snape’s only complimenting Draco in order to keep his cover, though. People Harry doesn’t like can’t possibly be better at stuff than he is!

*Harry and Ron are pretending to enjoy Hagrid’s cooking. They’d better get used to it, they’re going to be pretending for a long time in order no to hurt poor Hagrid’s fragile feelings.

*Can’t say I blame Mrs. Norris for following Hagrid around the castle.

*Hagrid’s such a bad liar. It’s just a sign of his big-hearted, loving nature! Good Occlumens like Snape and Draco are ebil-everyone should wear their hearts on their sleeves!

*Such burning questions at the end of the chapter1 It’s like a soap opera-what does Hagrid know? Stay tuned, folks. I know everyone’s on the edge of their seat here after such riveting information-Snape doesn’t like Harry, omg!1

Comments

[lilith-morgana.livejournal.com]

*Snape likes Draco, therefore he must be even more of a jerk!

Don't forget - it's also a sign of their mutual evilness. Teachers knowing the parents of students and treating them with special care, such awful things NEVAH happens in the Gryffindor corners. (OMG what if Snape buys Draco birthday pressies? OH THE BIAS!!!111 and McG totally didn't get a new broom for Harry oh noez.) And for Draco to accept such benevolent behaviour - evil, evil, evil.

*Hagrid’s such a bad liar. It’s just a sign of his big-hearted, loving nature! Good Occlumens like Snape and Draco are ebil-everyone should wear their hearts on their sleeves!

Yes! Emotions = everything. And they should CRY OPENLY when they do things they feel bad about. Or throw tantrums when they can't have things the way they like them. And interrupt things to get their point across. And rush in to save the day at the wrong time because they felt like it no matter if they are dead now, so there and so what if Voldie won we did what we thought was right and brave! Because surely there are no other reactions than Harry-approved ones - if you have the nerve to react to things differently you're surely evil. (Harry reminds me a lot of my mother, actually. She's 50 and hasn't yet accepted that just because some people don't cry it doesn't mean that they're not grieving. I suspect she'd be a hardcore Gryffindor.)

If Rowling makes any sort of final "if only more people were like Hagrid, we'd have no wars" point in book 7 I'll vomit myself to death. If more people were like Hagrid we'd have no laws against bestiality and instead of making progress in any direction, we'd be sitting in a circle weeping and sharing our favourite pet stories. I kind of want to cry just thinking about it.

[teratologist.livejournal.com]

Snape’s a mean teacher, based off of one JKR had. Such sweet revenge on him, right, inspiring a character who would become very popular.

You know, you just gave me a really bad flashback to the Salon boards and the women who insisted that Snape was actually meant as a portrait of a particularly stern-but-fair teacher who had helped teenage!Joanne out a lot with her teenage wangst and Seen Her Inner Gifts, all based on their own peculiar reading that rendered Snape indistinguishable from Mr. Darcy. Not your fault that you reminded me of this, of course, but I want to compell you all to share my pain.

[artystone.livejournal.com]

Ah, the chapter that launched a million wanks! Snape is a BAD TEACHER and he was ZOMG MEEN to Harry and now he doesn't DESERVE respect so Harry and co can mouth off to him and goof off in class and not do their homework and it's NOT HARRY'S FAULT if he FAILs his exams because it'll just be Snape failing him out of SPITE because look how good Neville did when Snape wasn't around, SEE! And why do people LIKE SNAPE anyway since JKR CLEARLY said he's AWFUL and based on a ZOMG MEEN teacher SHE HAD so what does THAT tell you? And anyway, McG will MAKE SURE Harry passes (because she's so fair and unbiased and all) so he can be an auror anyway coz he'd make a GREAT auror. Or profeshunal Quidditch player too. If he wants.

Can someone tell me why I'm in this fandom?

[kaskait.livejournal.com]

Why do the owls have to deliver the letters at breakfast? JKR neglects to mention that owls leave behind more than letters. Oh dear, biology.

That is why Hagrid is in the castle. One of his broken wand-pink umbrella speshul animal enchantment spells that he sprinkles like fairy dust around Hogwarts. He stops the owls for taking care of business in the wonderful food prepared by virtual slaves. Good man, Hagrid. Good man. If he isn't doing that, then he must be searching the halls for more ginormous spiders.

Ugh, Hermione’s so annoying here. Sucks not knowing the answer and being put on the spot, he doesn’t need Hermione stretching her hand to the ceiling here. Though she’s even worse in HBP, answering every damn question in Potions class.

She is so clueless on how to reallllly suck up to the right people. But then again, she got Harry on the hook. So she didn't do that bad afterall. All that puckering up to his derriere must be tiring.

Harry’s so witty here, isn’t he? Glad to see his sharp retorts haven’t changed.

Hey don't diss Hermione on her job before she was hired! Gee, now that she has GinnyJoSue on her schedule, she is going to have to laugh at a lot of..uhm...equally bad jokes.

Snape’s a mean teacher, based off of one JKR had. Such sweet revenge on him, right, inspiring a character who would become very popular.

Oh don't stop the fantasy. It brought a tear of lol to my eye. Just imagining, little Rowling being harangued by Snape and her little 12 year old self swearing that she will write an EXPOSE all about him. That will show him!!!!!111111!!!! I'm also imagining her wearing really large, black glasses and a scar crayoned onto her forehead. I bet she told everyone she was attacked! By an evil ferret and barely survived.

Such burning questions at the end of the chapter1 It’s like a soap opera-what does Hagrid know? Stay tuned, folks. I know everyone’s on the edge of their seat here after such riveting information-Snape doesn’t like Harry, omg!1

Awww, Hagrid was only embarrassed because Snape has to be justified in all teh hate. Why else would Hagrid be able to keep that WHOPPER of a secret all these years?

[musouka-manga.livejournal.com]

Snape’s a mean teacher, based off of one JKR had. Such sweet revenge on him, right, inspiring a character who would become very popular.

This has always made me laugh. I'm not sure I believe that JKR based Snape off of him for revenge or anything, but it is funny regardless. She probably shouldn't have written the "Snape is GOOD" twist ending if she genuinely didn't want him to be popular.

This chapter was what made me love Snape. I really only picked up the Harry Potter books as a kid to try to grasp what the big flipping deal was about. As such, I was sick of "Harry is SPECIAL" about two chapters into it, and was absolutely delighted to see someone that didn't try to kiss his ass. Sure, he was a complete dick, but it's a book. I'm not going to feel ashamed of liking an immature jerk if I find him amusing.

[saylee.livejournal.com]

*Hah, I love Harry thinking that McGonagall doesn’t favor Gryffindor just because she gave them a lot of homework. Snape would never do that to his Slytherins, he clearly tucks them in every night!

I'm getting a weird mental image from this. It goes something like this:

Snape: *tucks boys in, turns out the lights goes to leave*
Draco: Professor Snape, I'm thirsty.
Snape: *conjures a glass of water* There. Goodnight.
Crabbe: Professor, I'm hungry.
Goyle: Me too, sir.
Snape: No. Go to sleep.
Blaise: Sir? I can't sleep without the sounds of my stepfather screaming in pain.
Theodore: I'm afraid of the dark, sir.
Draco: Ha, what a baby.
Goyle: Don't you sleep with a Teddy bear, Malfoy?
Draco: Shut up.
Crabbe: Professor, will you read us a bedtime story?
Snape: Oh god, why me?

[mmmarcusz.livejournal.com]

*Harry and Ron are pretending to enjoy Hagrid’s cooking. They’d better get used to it, they’re going to be pretending for a long time in order no to hurt poor Hagrid’s fragile feelings.

Hagrid is so nightmarishly childish. Name one good act he performed in the entire series.