deathtocapslock | HBP Chapter Twenty: "Lord Voldemort's Request"

* The best benefit of being knocked out and poisoned, Harry thinks, is that Hermione is now friends with Ron again. If I were Ron I’d consider that a fairly major drawback, but then I’ve never really shared his fetish for hectoring sociopaths.

* Hitting bludgers at somebody is very dangerous, and Harry could have been seriously harmed if Coote and Peakes hadn’t caught him. So why use them at all? And for that matter, how come we don’t see more Quidditch injuries? IRL, and if bludgers were always as dangerous as they are here, we’d expect pretty much every match to end with half the players maimed or incapacitated. Honestly, Rowling, try and show some consistency. Either bludgers are annoyances that make you drop the ball, or they lead to serious injuries. Which is it?

* Luna thinks Ron’s making fun of her when he says how much he enjoyed the commentary. Of course, she should have known already that Ron, like all righteous people, just loves seeing Zach Smith humiliated. It serves him right for running away from Voldemort eighteen months in the future!

* Harry runs off to see Dumbledore, and leaves Hermione to do his homework for him. Yeah, I can totally see somebody like this rising to command the élite wizard police force before his thirtieth birthday.

* Maybe Hermione will do his case work for him. And his cooking and laundry, too. I can really see why Lavender might feel jealous of her.

* Dumbledore gets all passive-aggressive about Harry’s not retrieving the memory. I’m still not sure why it’s supposedly so vital, though, since he’s already got more than enough evidence that Tom is using horcruxes. About the only really important information the memory contains is that bit about making seven, but even that’s dubious (Tom might have changed his mind later, or not got around to making them all), and besides it’s not as if Dumbledore’s got any reason to think that this info is in the memory.

* Also, it’s a bit rich for Dumbledore to encourage everybody to show him blind obedience and unquestioning loyalty, and then complain when they’re not very good at thinking up ingenious schemes for themselves.

* Most likely, of course, Dumble’s just manipulating Harry into feeling ashamed and inadequate and even less likely to question the Twinkly One.

* “The idea that Dumbledore valued his opinion this highly” – yeah, don’t flatter yourself, Harry, Dumbledore doesn’t care what you think, unless knowing your opinions will make it easier for him to manipulate you somehow. This goes for everybody else he comes into contact with, too.

* Of course Dumbledore didn’t see fit to tell Dippet about his suspicions regarding Tom.

* Tom wanted to use his teaching position to indoctrinate students and build himself an army. Naturally Dumbledore was determined to stop him. There’s only room for one schoolroom indoctrinator in the wizarding world, Riddle, and don’t you forget it.

* “Professor Dippet was very fond of Voldemort and convinced of his honesty” – gee, I wonder if that had anything to do with the fact that Dumbledore had never told anybody about Tom’s psychopathic tendencies.

* Harry goes into the first memory. We can immediately tell that Hepzibah is morally degenerate because she wears pink.

* Also because she’s fat. Gosh, imagine how much she must have eaten to get like that. She really ought to have learned the virtue of moderation, like Harry, who always limits his portions at breakfast to nine bacon sandwiches or less.

* Hepzibah’s basically a female version of Slughorn: fat, vain, easy to see through and liable to slobber creepily over people young enough to be their children.

* Tom, on the other hand, looks even dreamier than before, although for some reason he’s wearing a suit rather than a set of robes.

* Everybody believes the elf must have poisoned Hepzibah, which makes Harry suddenly feel sympathetic towards Hermione’s SPEW group. Not sympathetic enough to actually help with SPEW’s activities, of course, or to free his own house elf, or to press for greater legal protections for house elves in general. Or to do anything at all, really.

* Tom’s no longer pretty in this next memory. Bad luck, Harry, looks like you’ll have to find someone else to swoon over.

* It’s no wonder Dumbledore prefers to remain at Hogwarts than to become Minister. After all, people are just so much easier to brainwash when they’re still young and impressionable.

* Tom seems sceptical about Dumbledore’s pronouncement that love is more powerful than dark magic. Possibly he’s wondering why, if that’s the case, Dumbledore doesn’t actually act in that loving a way.

* “‘I’m glad to hear that you consider them friends,’ said Dumbledore. ‘I was under the impression that they are more in the order of servants.’” No wonder Dumbledore’s lot hate the DEs so much. Narcissism of small differences, and all that.