Harry Potter & the Cursed Child

[borg-princess.livejournal.com]

For anyone who's curious, the plot of the play has been discussed in spoilery comments at the following links:

Source 1

Source 2

Source 3 UPDATE: Snitchseeker took down their spoilers as JKR called out another website for doing the same and TPTB have been contacting people to request they don't post any details. *eyeroll*

But never fear, Andrew Sims of Hypable (whom JKR called 'Wormtaily' for betraying the secret, lmao) linked to a cohesive recap of the entire two-part play.

When I first read about this, I thought it was someone trolling, but there's multiple sources? Either there's a conspiracy afoot or it's legit, IDK what to believe!

What kind of crappy fanfic, lmao! A Time-Turner plot, seriously? To save CEDRIC DIGGORY, of all people, wtf?

How shitty that anti-Slytherin prejudice is still going strong to the point that Albus is ostracized for being sorted into Slytherin. :/

Cackling at Ron & Hermione never getting together as a result of the temporal shenanigans, hehe. But I'm pissed that her being single results in her becoming a bitter Hogwarts teacher as opposed to happily married Hermione being the Minister of Magic, the implications there are pretty gross.

I can't even process everything I just read. Wow. JKR should be fired from her own world, just what even.

Comments

[dracasadiablo.livejournal.com]

Wtf?
I was expecting a disaster but this? It really exceed expectations.

All of it is so stupid, filled with unfortunate implications and only serves to make WW and everything and everyone in it; looks even worse then they did before.

It tells us that Harry never learned to control his anger and caps lock abuse. And that he and WW never bothered to learn anything.

Also, I supposed it's "nice" to know that Hermione's and Ron's relationship was fully and only based on jealousy on his part.
What with him never getting interested in her without seeing somebody else interested in Hermione.
Btw, are we to think that nobody ever asked Hermione out? So Ron never got to be jealous about it?
Or that she spent her life being bitter and only wishing to be with Ron? Hell, is that supposed to be some "Hermione turned into Snape" bs?

And yes, implications of married Hermione being Minister of Magic and unmarried bitter one being Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher are terrible. Also why that subject? Is it only because it's easiest and laziest choice for Jo (no need to retire any old teachers or come up with some other DADA teacher) or was it deliberately going for some warped Snape vibe?

[borg-princess.livejournal.com]

omg, I was so caught up in the moment over R/Hr being torpedoed (for now, this is only Part 1) that I didn't fully grasp exactly how thoroughly, if unintentionally, JKR just crucified the ship. Because YES, as you say, it is entirely based on jealousy. WOW. That's pretty harsh treatment for the endgame pairing from its own creator!

I mean, anti-R/Hr folks have been pointing out for years that their relationship is toxic and unhealthy and we never see them actually enjoy each other's company, but that really takes the cake.

are we to think that nobody ever asked Hermione out? So Ron never got to be jealous about it?

I'm guessing that once the Yule Ball with Padma was a success, he only had eyes for her after they started dating and so didn't care what Hermione was up to. She probably then threw herself at Cormac, but it was too late to get Ron's attention once he was in a supportive, loving relationship, and that's what drove her to spend her life ~alone forever~

Lol at the 'warped Snape' idea. It's 'Snape-lite' since she didn't get Ron killed, just lost him to another girl, but I see it...

[josephinestone.livejournal.com]

Until I read these spoilers I didn't even consider Rose/Scorpius being a thing, but now I'm like: duh, she hinted at it in the epilogue. And as much as I love Albus and Scorpius being friend, I don't think I could stomach any Rose/Scorpius.

Also, yeah. This sounds like really bad fan fiction. They should have spent a few months reading all the good fan fiction before they tried this.

[aikaterini.livejournal.com]

/She probably then threw herself at Cormac, but it was too late to get Ron's attention once he was in a supportive, loving relationship, and that's what drove her to spend her life ~alone forever~/

As much as I don’t agree with the idea that Hermione would be alone forever if she never married Ron, all I have to say is that after all the awful stuff that Hermione pulled in HBP, it serves her right. Oh, Ron didn’t magically fall into your arms after you endlessly harangued him, threw snit fits when he didn’t read your mind, and put him in the hospital wing for daring to date another girl instead of, you know, actually opening your big mouth and telling him how you felt about him? He instead ended up with a girl who didn’t do all of that passive-aggressive, immature, obnoxious garbage? Wow, imagine that.

/Lol at the 'warped Snape' idea. It's 'Snape-lite' since she didn't get Ron killed, just lost him to another girl/

*Snape and Lily are best friends. Snape does not tell Lily that he is in love with her. Snape eyes Lily ‘greedily’ as a child and dislikes her eventual love interest, James. But once she ends their friendship and starts dating James, he doesn’t do anything to her. When he accidentally causes her death by blurting out information to the wrong person, he spends the rest of his life trying to atone for it.*

HP fans: OMG, he’s such a creepy stalker, he totally just wants her for her body and nothing else!

*Hermione and Ron are best friends. Hermione does not tell Ron that she is in love with him. She belittles Ron and dislikes his eventual love interest, Lavender. When Ron starts dating Lavender – but does not end his friendship with Hermione – Hermione puts him in the hospital wing. She never apologizes or tries to atone for it.*

HP fans: OMG, poor Hermione! How dare Ron make her cry!

[elanor-x.livejournal.com]

\\ It tells us that Harry never learned to control his anger and caps lock abuse. And that he and WW never bothered to learn anything.

This was evident from the end of DH. "All was well" = return to pre-Voldemort status quo, with all the conditions which produce a new Dark Lord every generation or so. I read quite a few essays on the subject.

And, why would anybody think Harry "learned to control his anger", when he evolves from being almost unable to hurt Bellatrix in Ootp to being praised for his gallant Crucio in DH?

In post-war days, only Ginny wouldn't be afraid to push / shout back at him to make Harry control himself. Considering her own shouting-bullying tendencies, she is hardly the person to teach Harry self-control. In general, the latter seems a mark of evil in HP: only Slytherins, politicians and worse among Ravenclaws are capable of controlling and hiding their emotions.

\\ Also, I supposed it's "nice" to know that Hermione's and Ron's relationship was fully and only based on jealousy on his part.

In sistermagpie's HBP recaps on this site, she showed how the same seems to be true also for Harry and Ginny.

[elanor-x.livejournal.com]

Since I almost never liked time-travel fanfic, I was disappointed to hear it's such a central point in the new book.

Also, I was shocked to see Draco claiming "do you know who else had no one Harry?! VOLDEMORT DID AND SO DID I GROWING UP!"

Wasn't Narcissa's love for him crucial in HBP and DH, leading her to betray Voldemort and save Harry's life? She begged Snape to save Draco's life too.

\\ there's a rumor that Scorp is Voldy's son

Completely ridiculous. Scorp was born long after V's death and for all 7 HP books, we have never seen wizards having easy access to Time-Turners or explaining any mystery by linking it to time travel.

Also, Voldemort, as we've seen him, would be much more likely to kill Astoria rather than sleep with her, being an asexual representation of evil. Being uninterested in children suits V for another reason too: since he wishes for immortality, he has no need for heirs.

[vermouth1991.livejournal.com]

Laventadorn (on FF dot net and AO3) has finished the first part (Year Two to Year Four) of her AU girl!Harry fic called "The Never-ending Road". Go read that instead.

[borg-princess.livejournal.com]

I loooove that fic so damn much, I don't have the words ♥

[borg-princess.livejournal.com]

JKR shows time and time again she has zero respect for her own bloody canon, lol.

The Malfoys are a tight-knit family, they love each other, that's a key point as you say! At the very least, NARCISSA's love for Draco is beyond refute.

The Voldemort thing is being taken out of context, I believe. From what I gather, it's just what's rumored at school, kids being the mean bullies they are. As Draco's son and a Slytherin, that's the sort of nonsense they WOULD come up with. :/

[borg-princess.livejournal.com]

I just can't believe Harry saying he wishes his own son didn't exist - it's in character for a pre-teen like Albus to be obnoxious and say rubbish like 'I hate you, I wish you weren't my father', but for Harry to RECIPROCATE? Damn.

I hate that 'All was well'! Harry's scar isn't a connection to all the bad wizards ever, just to VOLDEMORT. His scar not troubling him means nothing.

[borg-princess.livejournal.com]

Rose/Scorpius is pretty popular in fandom - but not as popular as Albus/Scorpius! :P Apparently they're 'lowkey gay' in the play, haha, so there's equal opportunity fuel for shippers.

[jana-ch.livejournal.com]

I’ll explain in two words: Bad fanfic. Honestly, I wouldn’t read this story if I found it on fanfic-dot-net.

A niece named Delphinus? Are we talking about a female-to-male transsexual who has changed hir name from Delphina or Delphinina to fit hir self-identified sex? Or a male-to-female transsexual who has not bothered to change hir original name? I know wizarding Latin is bad, but I didn’t think it was so bad as to screw up the simplest point of grammatical gender.

Ron married Padma because you can’t marry anyone you didn’t have a date with in high school. And Hermione is teaching Defense because it was always her weakest subject.

[madderbrad.livejournal.com]

Also, I supposed it's "nice" to know that Hermione's and Ron's relationship was fully and only based on jealousy on his part.

In sistermagpie's HBP recaps on this site, she showed how the same seems to be true also for Harry and Ginny.

Rowling seemed incapable of depecting (teenage) romance by any mechanism other than jealousy. I've always complained about that (well, while rejoicing that Rowling made it so easy to damn her precious canon couplings :-)).

Harry's lust for Ginny in the first place is a (green-eyed) stomach monster born in jealousy over seeing Ginny kiss Dean. Half of Ginny's scenes in DH exhibit jealousy over anything female that might get close to Harry - women on his infinite camping trip, Gabrielle's crush, and, most damning of all, when Cho Chang, ex girlfriend, volunteers to help save Harry's life from the world's most evil dark lord, little Ginny's only thought is NO MUST NOT LET HER GET CLOSE TO HARRY.

H/G equals jealousy.

But R/Hr is much worse, of course (if only because it spanned more books). The only hint we have that Ron is interested in Hermione is via his jealousy - jealousy at Krum, at McLaggin, at Harry himself. Through the early books Hermione showed no attraction to Ron, but then Rowling penned HBP, Sweet Valley Hogwarts, and decided to have Hermione at long last show signs of interest in Won Won. How did she did it? The only way she knew how - jealousy. And so we had the puerile and very negative games of jealousy and spite that seemed to consume half of the penultimate HP volume.

I haven't been able to absorb much of these spoilers ... is Rowling basically conceding that R/Hr was based on jealousy?

I'm sure she'll have Part 2 restore the timeline and put back her precious canon pairings. To do anything else would be admitting that the canon wasn't perfect in the first place, and I don't think Rowling is capable of that.

[madderbrad.livejournal.com]

I didn't fully grasp exactly how thoroughly, if unintentionally, JKR just crucified the ship.

I can't see Rowling admitting that her books are anything less than perfect, so I'm sure Part II will be occupied with restoring the timeline and her previous primary pairings.

Although if Part 1 was spent in analysing how bad canon's H/G and R/Hr are it sounds like there'll be lots of material - Rowling's own findings - to use as ammunition on the shipping front?!

[madderbrad.livejournal.com]

Ron married Padma because you can’t marry anyone you didn’t have a date with in high school.

Hee. giggle-out-loud. Rowling's HP is so simplistic in some ways, isn't it? And continues to be so.

[madderbrad.livejournal.com]

I haven't absorbed too much of the plot but it sounds horrible, 'bad fanfic' as so many fans seem to have opined. Major mistake to bring in time travel - that's a topic that automatically makes for a failed story unless the author knows what she's doing.

Joanne ('oh, maths!') Rowling is not that sort of author.

We'll have to look up our books and see exactly where Time Turners are mentioned. Wasn't there a hard-and-fast rule that they couldn't alter the timeline? Or if they did the universe would explode? This will have to be checked out.

Thanks for the links and post!

[fdsfd (from livejournal.com)]

ok sorry for the intrusion but can I join please? I need a place to vent/erupt like a volcano made of hate...

All JKR's post DH stuff has been so thoughtless that it really made me reread the entire series in a new (worse) light. She is quite a callous author, it seems to me now. And based on the spoilers I'd say that CC seems "callous" for the following reasons:

1. Harry re-enacting his trauma with his own children. I never bought the "oh he's such a loving hero" the first time I read the books, but on reflection he never did much to empathise with other people, like properly empathise, by treating other people as equals - naming his son Albus almost seemed like a condescending gesture to a dead guy - "oh I will bestow forgiveness upon you from on high" (as if Snape would ever old out for his approval) but even worse is to impress a child with some other guy's sins and then forcing the child to bear witness to your own childhood abuse (like wtf is it with giving his youngest son his orphan blanket when the other kids get bomb gifts... like dude your kid doesn't need to know every detail of your life that you failed to come to terms with or get proper help for)
... ofc he'd still hate Slytherin and fail to move on from his past and become a cog in a Ministry Machine that probably still perpetuates the rotten status quo... and treat his kid poorly based on his own shitty prejudices... ofc... progress is for muggles....

2. Girls, especially Next-gen girls being plot points rather than people (Rose, Delphina (who kind of looks like a less well thought out version of Calypso in Harry Potter and the Boy Who Lives), Ginny, Hermione demonstrating what happens when she doesn't marry Ron in another timeline (becoming a shrew))
with Hermione and Ron...whats the bet she posted a ship manifesto in 2007 under a pseud and got shredded online for it?? she comes across as so bitter to her fandom

3. "Harry Potter and the ode to manpain" - see Draco's "redemptive arc" (which ofc his wife has to be dead for); Albus's pain of having a shitty father; Harry's pain of having a shitty childhood, Albus (the first)'s pain of being a shitty person, Snape's pain of treating a dead girl like an icon rather than a person (somewhat understandable but does he need to be in this play???), etc... but of course (before you even ask) Delphina's pain of having a dead father and mother and a non-existent childhood is revolting

4. Re-writing her own established facts in a way that is obvious (like explaining how time-turners work, destroying all of them, oh one was saved, oh Sirius never appears at GH)... like she is the only one whose reading of her own book counts even if she never bothered to re-read it...

5. Albus and Scorpius's relationship is best friends but not gay!!!! No gays at Hogwarts no sir!!!

6. Treating Cedric like a disposable toy is probably the worst part of the spoilers imho... like her characters are her own personal toys and she can just change whatever integrity they had based on her own whims... ugh I wish she'd never written this horrible play.

Thank god I still have my favourite fanfics; gotta get the taste of these awful spoilers out of my mouth

[t0ra-chan.livejournal.com]

Wow, if that is really the plot of the play, then Rowling has truly lost any talent she might have had. She basically destroyed the whole message of HP that was so important to her: death is final and we need to accept it. But nope, instead we just go back in time to save a character nobody in canon has cared about since book 5. And didn't she destroy all the time turners in book 5 precisely to avoid people asking why the characters don't use them to save people?

And then there is all the minor stuff:

Why is Albus in Slytherin when he clearly didn't want to end up there and Harry told him that he can ask the hat to put him somewhere else? He seemed neither cunning nor ambitious, so it seems he is there just for drama.

Why is Draco saying his parents didn't love him when at least Narcissa clearly did?

Why would Harry give a shit about this blanket? He has no positive connection to the Dursleys and he never came across as sentimental to me.

Does Rowling have any idea how often they would have to spin the time turner to get back more than 25 years? That would be about a quarter million spins, that would take ages.

It's all just so stupid, filled with plot holes and characters being ooc.

[borg-princess.livejournal.com]

You're welcome! I admit, I posted this thinking that you might get a kick out of R/Hr being retconned out of existence - I'm sure the universe will be set to rights by the end of Part 2 (and how ridiculous and blatant a money-grab is that), but still. ^_^

I can't be bothered looking up PoA to see what JKR said on Time-Turners, but let's be real, JKR wouldn't have even taken the time (lol) to fact-check herself. From what I recall, you weren't able to alter the timeline, it was something to do with a closed loop, ie. you could only change things if you ORIGINALLY changed it and therefore you were only making it happen as it was MEANT to happen. (so the kids could only save Buckbeak because they didn't see him getting executed because they had already gone back in time to free him something something timey-wimey handwave)

I actually thought that was pretty clever, it was a neat way of explaining why nobody ever used Time-Turners to change history because it wasn't possible, but obviously she had to ruin one of the good things she established.

In the comments at one of the posts, someone pointed out that if Albus and Scorpius prevent Cedric from competing in the maze, thus keeping him from being killed in front of Harry, that means Harry isn't able to see thestrals which were a big plot point in OotP... (I guess Voldy could've killed someone else, but this is the problem with time-travel, you pull out one thread and the whole thing unravels)

[oryx_leucoryx]

I'm pretty sure Tonks didn't date Remus in high school, but then they are both dead.

[oryx_leucoryx]

Hermione said terrible things happen when people meet themselves while time-turning, and her actions are such that show she doesn't want to overtly change the timeline, but I don't think this is stated explicitly as something that *can't* be done.

[snapes-witch.livejournal.com]

Here's Part 2. Read it and weep.

http://victorkrvm.tumblr.com/post/145680264471/in-depth-plot-summary-of-cursed-child-part-two

[sweettalkeress.livejournal.com]

Am I the only one who thinks this sounds like an unintentional comedy? So...Harry's son Albus is upset that people shun him and his friend Scorpio, and so they decide to travel through time to make everyone love them? But they just fuck shit up further? Sounds like the comedic possibilities are endless.

The Epitome of Bad Fanfic

[jana-ch.livejournal.com]

Delphinus/Delphina/Delphi is Voldemort's daughter.

Need I say more?

[penguinsuzie.livejournal.com]

Mother of Zeus! This is like watching a train wreck.