CoS Chapter Two

[sistermagpie.livejournal.com]

*Is Dobby warning everyone that he’s going to be totally annoying and we’ll never get rid of him? Because I am.

*Harry manages not to scream, but it was hard. Not too hard, being a Gryffindor. But hard enough that not doing it shows he’s kind of a badass.

*Petunia’s laugh can easily be recognized as false all the way upstairs.

*Dobby begins by bowing and scraping to Harry. Well, we know this is a character on his way into the inner circle.

*Not that Harry will encourage him to bow and scrape. It’s quite embarrassing to him. But it’s always easier to start with too much admiration and scale back. Just look at Zacharias Smith.

*Harry tells Dobby to sit down politely. Because Harry is polite, officially.

*Although Dobby is more sycophantic than most House-Elves (and most people with a sexual fetish for submission), he’s incapable of lowering his voice when god-like Harry tells him to do so.

*Maybe he’s actually been wanting Harry to discipline him all these years.

*Someone could probably write a whole paper on the bizarre rituals of the House-Elf mind, but isn’t it a bit odd that while Dobby may be going on about his evil family, he’s not saying they punish him, but that they let him punish himself? Passive-aggressive much Dobby?

*Harry quickly tells Dobby whatever he’s heard about his greatness is rubbish because he’s not even the top of his class. Sure he’s the Quidditch champion who won the cup last year and is the youngest Seeker ever and a total natural and also the house cup because he put the Philosopher’s Stone in danger and then saved it but honestly, not great at all!

*Harry’s horrified at being made to stay in the world he doesn’t belong in—the Muggle one. He’ll probably have to visit Madam Pomfrey when he gets back to school for a cootie shot after all the time he’s spent here already!

*"He hasn’t got a brother, has he?" Heh. Good one Harry. Look out for the Wicked Dark Lord of the East!

*Dobby’s act is so tiring to me already, and we’re only a page into it. Just tell Harry the damn plot since you’re already breaking the rules.

*Btw, what plot is this? Isn’t it not about Harry exactly? Am I getting mixed up here? Because if the plot is the diary plot Harry’s not the one in danger. I guess he’s just the only person Dobby thinks deserves a warning, even if he’s not the person who needs the warning.

*Funny how of all the houses in the WW the Malfoy house seems to be the one that’s home to the people most sure Harry is to be treated as a god.

*Who exactly does Dobby talk to, exactly, to get his ideas about the world? It seems like he’s got a subscription to the Order of the Phoenix Point of View Weekly delivered to him in the Malfoy kitchens. This week’s headline: Dumbledore: Powers That Rival Voldemort At His Height Only He’s Too Noble To Use Them.

*Dobby really is being totally rude for no reason and ruining the Dursleys (who could be a nice family for all he knows) dinner. But wait! Turns out Dobby ruined a racist joke. Talk about having an instinct for doing the right thing!

*When Vernon leaves, Harry complains about the injustice of being accused of making too much noise when too much noise was being made in his room and he’s the only one there. Unfortunately, he’s too humble to use his Harry Potter Super Saint powers to tell Dobby to lower his voice and stop hitting things to make noise. I guess that’s just not the type of thing you’d ask of an equal.

*Harry can recognize Hagrid’s letter from the scribble that substitutes for handwriting. And presumably the smudges from his tears.

*I would so hate Dobby if I were Harry.

*Dobby’s kind of a study in the "it’s the intentions that count, totally!" theory of HP. I remember years ago, when I didn’t know HP well enough to feel sure of my canon, talking to someone who was saying how much she hated Draco for breaking Harry’s arm and that her favorite character was Dobby.

*LOL. Harry lands catlike on the carpet. I’m sure he changed into black trousers and turtleneck before he ran down the stairs too.

*See, my problem is some people find it funny when well-meaning people fuck this up repeatedly even when they’re told to stop. It just makes me really really angry.

*Because Harry won’t obey Dobby, Dobby threatens to do something bad to him. This is totally a guy I’d consider my friend. If the violets don’t work he might have to go Jack Bauer on Harry’s ass.

*Btw, there’s no reason for Dobby to think that dropping the dessert will make Harry decide not to go to school. All it seems to prove to me is that Dobby’s an asshole. And knowing Harry, this would make him all the more determined to go back to school, as it would mostly all people.

*It’s so weird. Harry has a bad temper a lot of the time, and can be driven to fury, and yet when he’s in the kind of situation that would drive me to fury, he’s all sympathetic to Dobby. I guess that’s why people thought CAPSLOCK Harry was OOC. Anybody who didn’t throw Dobby in a meatgrinder must be a zen master.

*Dobby’s not only got Harry almost expelled (don’t worry, you know Harry can’t ever get punished for something he actually did unless the punishment’s exaggerated), he’s lost him his main source of protection at the Dursleys.

*I would wish that somebody would come to the house to investigate who actually cast the charm, but I’ve no doubt Harry would wind up saying that he did it because that’s the right thing to do to protect Dobby. Or just because it’s always brave to get yourself in trouble when you didn’t do anything, even if there’s no reason to do it. (See: Hermione)

*Uncle Vernon was as bad as his word. I guess because Harry was as bad for his business deal as he expected.

*Not sure why Vernon puts bars on Harry’s windows and locks him in his room…oh wait, this must be that exaggerated punishment that doesn’t fit the crime we ordered.

*Kind of Harry to think of Dobby as having saved him from horrible happenings at Hogwarts instead of thinking of him for ruining his life.

*Harry tells Hedwig there’s no good turning her beak up at the gruel they’re getting to eat because it’s all they’ve got. I think I know what Hedwig would prefer to eat—Dobby the idiot House-Elf.

*Harry wonders if anyone would be sent to the Dursleys if he didn’t come back to school to make him come back. You mean like the way they chased you all over creation and threatened the Dursleys if they didn’t let you come in the first place, Harry? Yeah, I think they might do that. In fact, they might give Petunia a horse’s head for good measure to ease the trauma of the injustice.

*Why look, the Wizards will send someone even if you haven’t not shown up at school. It’s no wonder Harry imagines widespread panic sixth year when he’s stuck on the train.

*Yes, the Weasleys have already taken their rightful place as the family who gets to make decisions for Harry. Obviously the Muggles can’t do it, they’re Muggles!

*Still, far better to see Ron at the window than Dobby!





Idiot Picture
When you start the book with Dobby, there’s really no other way the picture can go.

Idiot World
The Underaged Magic rule is one of the only laws we ever see enforced, and yet there’s almost no way to enforce it fairly. I guess this is foreshadowing of Wizard Justice in general, in preparation for PoA. (Yes, we can tell magic was committed in your house two minutes ago. No, we have no way of knowing who did it. Nor do we think to investigate it.

Nut o’ Fun
I’m kind of intrigued by Petunia’s pudding. Cream and sugared violets sound kind of fabulous.

Final score: 3

Signs of things to come: We are never ever getting rid of Dobby and he and he will never ever stop being annoying.

Comments

[saylee.livejournal.com]

I'm replying to this so that it's still in the right thread, but no one has to see the tramatic picture in their notification. Seriously, should I delete it? The more I think about it, the more squicked I get, not to mention that I'm mortified that I drew it, let alone that I posted it too.

I think this should be a lesson to me about why I should let these sorts of mental images die a quiet death.

[anehan]

Don't delete it. It's hilarious in all its squickiness. And if you want to share more squicky mental images, I'm all for it. I may have to bleach my brain afterwards, but life is more interesting with a bit of Harry/Dobby porn.