POA - Chapter 21

[kaskait.livejournal.com]

* Hermione has a secret deus ex machina. Its a good thing too, because fates forbid that Harry have to do any real work in solving this dilemma.

* Harry awakes to hear Fudge about to give Snape an award for capturing Black. As if the author will ever let that happen. Pffft.

* Snape wonders if giving Harry special treatment is a good thing. But naaaaaah, noone listens to him. Besides Harry is filled with PURE LOVE! He deserves any special treatment he gets including a "get out of jail free" pass when he tries to slice up another student.

* Harry notices that Hermione is awake now too. Thanks be, because then that means Harry won't have to go the extra mile in asking Hermione for help.

* Of course, they are discovered by Madam Pomfrey, whose only purpose is to fix needless injuries. Why the nurse anyway? Couldn't the teachers be just as capable of doing all of this? Snape?

* Harry yells out too all and sundry that Black was set up. Because attempted murderers would never attempt to murder again. Of course no one listens until Dumbledore shows up. Will he let Black and Snape off the hook with his crazy ass plans? No. Its much better to let everyone suffer needlessly so he can sacrifice Harry in the last book. Can't you feel the love of Albus?

* Hermione tries to tell Snape that he was mistaken in the facts. She is probably still worried about her potion grade.

* Snape tries to remind Dumbledore of the attempted Marauder murder plot. But Dumbledore lets him know that it really doesn't matter.

* Ummmmm, just why does Snape stick around? Was Lily that bang-a-able? Oh, I forgot, she is realllllly popular like GinnySue.

* You know, Snape's fixation is kind of necromantic. ewwwwww. Why didn't he just make a zombie Lily?

* Preferably out of GinnySue.

* When Dumbledore finally gets the kids alone, he gives Hermione the go-ahead to use illicit magic. Since they are surrounded by adults, I guess the MOM can't tell that there is a renegade time-turner on the loose.

* Don't you just love Dumbledore allowing children to stretch their wings and commit deeds of certain death? I know I want men like him teaching my kids.

* Of course Ron can't be involved. That would mean Rowling would actually have to give him something more to do instead of be the stupid one of the trio. Besides there is no plot point that Ron has to affect now.

* Time...travel...if possible, would be a tricky deal. Beyond the scope of a silly time-turner. Think of all the decisions that everyone makes in the world. Every day, every hour, every minute and beyond is a decision affecting the outcome of our shared experience of time. I'm not even going to include all the non-human life in this equation. How does the time-turner know which thread to follow out of all those universes made by each decision? Yeah, so, which alternate universe did Harry and Hermione actually screw around with?

* Harry and Hermione defying the laws of almost everything go back into TIME!

* Why didn't anyone attempt to use this little handy device to go back in time and give Riddle a mother? Couldn't they have headed all of this off at the pass by having the poor dude adopted? No I guess he wasn't worth the extra help, being all evil and such.

* Hermione dumps all her deus ex machina explanations on us to make the hooey go down easier.

* Its amazing how well this rigged ending holds up. Too bad this is the last book in the series that was reasonably decent.

* I find it amazing that the MOM, and in turn Minerva, would give such a possibly cataclysmic device to a young child. I guess learning how to abuse animals by turning them into other objects really is worth the mayhem.

* The kids stalk themselves to Hagrid's hut. Why couldn't they warn themselves to stay away from Hagrid in the future and spare us his love affair subplot.

* Harry and Hermione kidnap Buckbeak because how else will Black make his getaway? Slinking away as a dog just isn't heroic enough for an attempted murderer.

* They wait around a few hours until the story picks up again. At least it was only a few pages in this book. In the last book it would be chapter upon chapter of waiting inside a tent.

* Harry and Hermione recap the entire book just in case the reader hit his or her head and forgot the plot.

* They hide in Hagrid's empty hut while Lupin goes insane. Yeah, no heroic calling to the wolves from Hermione here.

* Despite being a time traveler, it still takes Harry quite a long time to figure out that he was the one who saved himself, Hermione, and Black with that super awesome patronus. The really big spell that was supposed to be significant and the only spell Harry does. Possibly with the exception of expelliarmus.

* Harry and Hermione watch Snape take their past selves to safety. Not because he could possibly care but because he wants to capture Black. We can't ever think that Snape deserves a heart.

* And this lovely story almost ends on a high note when the dynamic duo releases a convicted murderer. Go, be free, beautiful, beautiful butterfly!

* Black hops onto Buckbeak, tells Harry that he is just like his father then flies into the night. No word about how wonderful Hermione is like the movie. That might take away from the wonder of Ginny if that happened.

* Really, was Hermione needed in this book? Couldn't most of her role be taken by Ginny? It would have meant that Ginny would have an understandable tie to Harry instead of being unconscious in a snake pit. I guess the plot point wasn't needed yet.

Comments

[savagedamsel10.livejournal.com]

* You know, Snape's fixation is kind of necromantic. ewwwwww. Why didn't he just make a zombie Lily?
* Preferably out of GinnySue.

LOL! That would be hilarious, Ginny will be saved before it's too late and HBP arrives AND Snape will be less of a woobie and more of a psycho. Cool.

Are there any Snape/Ginny shippers? I can't help but wonder since this fandom has so many ships, although my non-woobie version of Snape probably would have murdered her early in the relationship because he got tired of her one-trick pony Bat Bogey Hex.

[kaskait.livejournal.com]

Snape probably would have murdered her early in the relationship because he got tired of her one-trick pony Bat Bogey Hex.

Oh that Bat Bogey Hex, the most powerful spell of ALL! Even Hannibal Lector would quake at the thought of GinnyJoSue making his nose leak snot.

I'm not woman enough, so I guess I don't understand the full power of snot hexes and their uses in the fight against dark lords.

-

There must be Ginny/Snape shippers out there. Especially now, after the last book. :D

[merrymelody.livejournal.com]

LOL, you could try here: severus_n_ginny.

[mmmarcusz.livejournal.com]

That's a pretty terrifying fantasy. But I love Snape's inferiority complex:

“You are not a virgin, are you?” I ask belatedly.

“No,” she says, and I wonder if it’s been Potter.

Ha! He is always one step ahead...

[indongcho.livejournal.com]

Of course there are Snape/Ginny shippers! There are shippers for everything, including Snape/The Giant Squid!

Here's a spork of one Snape/Ginny story: http://community.livejournal.com/deleterius/3008562.html#cutid1

There's also Ron/Voldemort, Harry/Voldemort, Dumbledore/Snape (that's in the infamous Subjugation, I believe).... I'm serious. I doubt you could think of a pairing which hasn't been written about. I've actually sporked a story which ships Harry/Draco/Snape. At the same time. Oh, and there's also Hermione/Fleur....