OotP Chapter Twenty-Four

[sistermagpie.livejournal.com]

*A new subject Harry isn't good at at all. Like Divination and History of Magic, it's not really something a hero needs.

*I misspelled Occlumency for two years.

*Sirius was supposed to be smart when he was a teenager, but now Harry appears to be far more on the ball than he is. I suspect if we were reading Marauders era Hogwarts Sirius would be much smarter than the adults then, and so on.

*Naturally Harry does not mention his suspicions about Kreacher to Sirius, because if you care about someone you never share information that might be important, especially if it might ruin the last of their good mood. ETA: But don't let that policy keep you from resenting and fretting about people if you find out there's anything about them they didn't tell you after they're dead.

*Sirius has "fits of the sullens." See, this is why you can’t be that sad when Sirius dies, because when you’re an adult with this little dignity it’s almost merciful. Molly’s probably thrilled at this development, though.

*"Squash him--squash him! He’s only a pawn!" Ah, Ron speaks the WW credo. That can't be unintentional.

*When Sirius says to the ceiling, "You know...I think I’d prefer it if you didn’t give orders here, Snape. It’s my house, you see," he sounds exactly like Malfoy.

*ETA: Not that this says anything all that interesting. Any more than Bellatrix's last crazy look reminding Harry of Ginny at her best moment in any way suggests anything weird about him or her.

*ETA again: After all, I believe Harry is "bizarrely" reminded of Ginny's blazing look at that moment, as if it's just Harry's mind being weird and not a moment of clarity where he recognizes that he, like Voldemort, can only deal with women who are his batshit groupies.

*Snape so rarely gets to have fun it’s nice he enjoys needling Sirius and getting quietly waspish while Sirius yells.

*Sirius is taller than Snape. Just making a note.

*Tellin Harry he’s getting Occu—thing lessons would be the perfect chance to explain what Voldemort’s doing in a vague way, but no, Harry seems to be unable to come up with any other possibility than possession, which is weird because, err, isn’t it kind of obvious what Voldemort’s doing? I feel badly for Harry being kept out of the loop in this book, but sometimes it seems like Snape could sit him down with a flow chart and he still wouldn’t get it. (Hee—it’s like that comic about PoA where he’s holding up signs that say LUPIN! WEREWOLF!)

*While presumably Sirius’ eyes stay right on Snape’s face when they face off, Snape’s own eyes dart from the tip of Sirius’ wand to his face—much more Slytherin (and probably seen as a sign of cowardice by Sirius).

*ETA: Btw, this is the scene where Lily's oh-so-important LETTER is actually on the table, isn't it? Like maybe that's what started their argument even though they luckily never mention anything about Lily ever in Harry's presence? And even though we have no way of knowing how a letter Lily wrote years after Sirius left home wound up here?

*Now Sirius (warning Snivellus he knows he’s isn’t reformed) sounds like a character in a Redeemed!Draco fic yelling at Draco, only in the R!D fic it'd be "Ferret" instead of "Snivellus."

*Snape knows to stick to his advantage, suggesting Dumbledore won’t listen to Sirius because he’s been "hiding in his mother’s house." Which of course is neither here nor there and Snape knows it, but Snape also knows it makes Sirius feel emasculated so he hammers on it.

*ETA: Poor Snape reduced to claiming Dumbledore listens to him more than someone else knowing how that relationship works.

*ETA: Seriously, how bizarre is it that Hotheaded Sirius *never* brings up Lily in his fight with Snape here? As long as they're hitting below the belt, after all. It's like somebody put a jinx on them to never speak of her.

*Never noticed this, because like most people I was too busy reacting to Sirius referring to Snape as Lucius’ lapdog, but Snape tells him Lucius did indeed recognize him at the station. Are we to suspect Snape is still in close contact with Lucius, or did Draco tell him?

*ETA: I pause here to mourn the Snape/Malfoy/Draco connection which was tossed over a cliff after it served its plot purpose. Snape and Draco's story in HBP must be the most elaborate mechanism to move a wooden stick from one hand to another in the history of literature.

*Are we sure he was really that brilliant as a kid? Because he's really gullible. "Are you calling me a coward?" No, Sirius, he’s laughing while you call yourself a coward for being reasonable.

*What lesson did Arthur learn about dabbling in Muggle medicine? That it can be ineffective against magical snakebites or that it’s all stupid and barbaric and his wife will yell at him if he ever says otherwise?

*To an outsider, Harry must look sometimes like the worst combination of Sirius and James. On the James side you’d see him surrounded by followers and thinking he was the center of the universe; on the Sirius side he’d have that ugly black cloud hovering above him that warned you not to try to be civil. ETA: Of course the black cloud is Voldemort's fault and if you're loyal enough to stand out from the cloud you see he's all Sainted!Lily!

*Hermione, naturally, gets the point of the Occlumency lessons straight off, but doesn't make sure Harry gets it. At least we know Hermione knows everything that’s going on. I was worried for a second. People wonder why she would marry Ron, but she's obviously got a thing for thickheads and Ron's got Harry slightly beat in that department.

*ETA: LOL! Check out this next thing I wrote in 2005: Lupin’s relationship with Harry in this book largely consists of whispering until he walks into the room, and then shutting up. (Lupin shakes hands with everyone at Hogwarts—no one-armed hugs for him.) If there’s supposed to be any super-schmoopy bond between him and Harry or him and Sirius, it’s not visible to the naked eye. I’m beginning to see why people write Remus/Tonks, at least. I don’t see anything in particular between them, but they are usually paired off in the book. ETA again: Kinda nailed it! *gives self goldstar*

*Harry’s so noble. It will not be he who lures Sirius from the house, no matter how foully he is treated by Snape. Not even if Snape chains him to the wall and tortures him! Or forces him into marriage! Or boils him in oil! No, he shall suffer the slings and arrows alone! (And then lure Sirius out another way, but that’s another story.) Are you seeing the irony yet?

*Sirius’ gift seems like a handy way of getting in touch without being seen. Is there a reason they didn’t use it before? ETA: Now I would consider an actual Chekov's gun that did get used.

*How sad is it that I’m relieved when Ginny is in the group not sitting with Harry on the Knight Bus because that means I don’t have to hear her talk?

*Fic writers: Note the way Stan uses the word "nutter" and learn.

*Smith strides away in an “annoyingly buoyant fashion” after learning Harry sucks at something. Heh. I love Zach in this moment for being such a normal kid.

*It’s all a lie of course—Harry is not remedial at anything. Hopefully Zach will pay for believing otherwise. Ron offers to jinx him for…being slightly less obnoxious than any of Ron’s own friends and family, but Harry morosely tells him no. It’s no use anyway. He is fated to suffer. Woe.

*ETA: Honestly, how could I read Zach in this scene and not see that he was totally the kind of guy who would shove little kids out of the way as he ran to save his sorry arse? He was buoyant at the idea of Harry being bad at something!!!

*Harry worries how "everyone" is going to think he’s really stupid, yet there’s no time I can remember where anybody reacts at all to his supposed Potions lessons unless it’s just the immediate reaction to being told about them. Neither Zach nor Malfoy seem to tell the whole school as Harry predicts. It’s almost as if the school isn’t fanatically interested in everything Harry does. But that obviously can't be right.

*Harry is so not into Cho.

*Harry’s going a little overboard about these "awful" lessons with Snape, isn’t he? He seems to see himself as some young virgin locked up with the Marquis de Sade. I can’t help thinking if I were him I’d probably be kind of excited about learning a new, cool form of magic. But then, I guess when you’re always getting private special lessons it gets old. ETA: Malfoy was probably excited about his lessons, but that just shows he's a little ass.

*More casual insulting of Muggles—only they speak of "mind reading." They don’t understand the mind is a many-layered thing blah blah blah. Um, yes they do. And I suspect Ron might speak of mind reading if the situation arose. ETA: Not to mention--Snape, you're a Half-blood. And you'd probably been much better off and happier if you stuck with the Muggles, so shut up.

*Hogwarts is protected by "many ancient spells and charms…" but not wards. Just pointing out the canon/fanon here. ETA: Though of course any of those spells and charms can be broken if the plot demands it.

*Snape specifically says eye contact is needed for Legilimency (which I apparently also misspell), but Harry does not make any connection to Dumbledore’s not meeting his eye, even though he’s been worried about that detail for two chapters. Harry seems to only draw connections between things when they are the wrong connections. I’m sure Hermione would have figured it out. I’m so glad she’s not here to move the plot faster.

*ETA: Honestly, imagine if Steve Kloves got his wish and the books really were about Hermione. Every title would be: Hermione Granger and the...Oh, She's Solved It Already.

*Harry’s heart is pumping fast because "none of [this] adds up," which is a testament to why wizard education is so woefully deficient. If Harry had had something beyond fifth grade math perhaps he’d see that it does add up—pretty simply, in fact, like 2+2=4.

*I wonder if there’s any interesting reason that Snape knows that Voldemort now knows about Harry sharing his brain. (I also wonder if by sharing a brain between them they can come up with a decent evil scheme for the next book, but I suspect not.) ETA: Nope, nothing to see here. Move along.

*Harry’s first memory is watching Dudley with his tricycle and his heart "bursting" with jealousy. Surely Harry couldn’t hate people like Dudley because of jealousy instead of being nobly offended by spoiled children because he wants to protect the weak.

*I guess Harry should really get extra points for rising above petty jealousy. And being rewarded with the best two tricycles broomsticks of them all. And nobody should be jealous of them, because he deserves them.

*Did Harry cast a stinging hex with his wand or did he do it wandlessly?

* Snape’s one question after seeing Harry’s thoughts is, "To whom did that dog belong?" I would appreciate that, myself. It gets them away from the humiliation and makes it mundane—it’s no big deal, whose dog was that? Okay, let’s move on. (And btw, Harry, even a dog will bite if you bait it. You must have baited Ripper to make him chase you up a tree. Bet you didn’t listen to Aunt Marge’s instructions either.)

*Harry can as easily let go of his anger as detach his legs. An obvious point, but a good one. Especially since he’s got no reason to be angry at Snape, here. Obviously this isn’t something you should study with somebody you don’t trust for good reason, but if Harry could just approach it all more intellectually…oh wait, of course he can’t. Never mind.

*Snape gives Harry a pretty clear idea of how his normal way of acting leaves him vulnerable, and all Harry can hear is the insult that "he’s weak." You know, I know it’s only in fanon that Malfoy and Snape are ice princes, but they actually do seem better at this. They may not be able to hide their emotions, but they don’t wear their hearts proudly on their sleeves. ETA: JKR seems to agree, what with them both being good at Occlumency.

*Snape is going about this the worst way possible, probably, though this may be the way he learned the skill so he thinks it’s a good idea. I’ve studied meditation and "empty your mind" is not a helpful direction. Though I admit I can’t imagine too many people in this universe being capable of meditation. Except probably Slinkhard. Pinko hippie pacifist bastard.

*When Harry starts to say Voldemort wants something from the DoM, would it really be so hard for Snape to say, “Whatever he wants, it’s our job to make sure you don’t help him get it. Thus, the Occlumency lessons?” I guess so. ::sigh::

*These lessons are really not very slashy, at least to me.

*Hermione’s interested in the headless hats—does that mean she’ll be working on a special invisibility spell that saves the day soon? I hope she’s displaying a little resentment here that she couldn’t come up with it, since the twins only do “useless” magic. Here they seem naturally more talented than she is here.

*Ron’s braver than I thought if he can deal this calmly with his friend lying on the floor maniacally laughing like the Joker.

*So Voldemort’s thrilled the DEs have escaped. I guess when he sort of died he forgot they’re all idiots.



Exploitation Filmmakers’ Credo
Why is Harry suddenly not making connections about things he’s been thinking about for so long? Why can’t he see the point of these lessons?

IITS
Wait, Sirius has a way to get in touch with Harry that doesn’t include letters or the fireplace? Why didn’t they use that bef—oh, IITS.

Idiot Picture
Harry won’t tell Sirius his fears about Kreacher, nobody will tell Harry exactly what Voldemort’s doing, Harry will do exactly what Voldemort wants him to do despite everybody specifically telling him not to do that.

The first time I read this, this was the chapter where I really started to feel like the characters were pretending they couldn’t understand stuff or refusing to say stuff they would. It made for a tedious read to feel like I was 10 steps ahead and waiting for everybody to catch up.

Idiot World
Luckily, Voldemort’s dumb enough to think getting Bellatrix Lestrange released from prison will be helpful, so it’ll all even out in the end.

Informed Attributes
Sirius was just brilliant as a teenager. You’ll have to trust us on this one. After all, Voldemort was also brilliant as a teenager and look at him now. The idiocy of the adult is directly in proportion to the genius of the teenager, just like real life.

Light Bulb Moment
Without an actor making a lightbulb moment face, we’ll have to make to with "I KNOW! I KNOW!" or Hermione’s, "Of course…"

McGuffin
Everybody wants that weapon!

Misdirected Answering
At times Harry seems to demand this rule. When he thinks he might be getting to the bottom of things he’s sure to fire off questions at Snape so he never gets to finish a sentence. He needs to know why he was seeing through the snake’s eyes. Exactly what’s going on can wait until later. We may never know why Moody didn’t just hand Harry a portkey, or they didn’t use the TT to save Sirius, but at least we know why Harry was in the snake in his dream!

POV Shots
No pov shots, but much discussion of previous pov shots. "But why was Harry in the snake???" It's because he's in Voldemort, and Voldemort is in Nagini because Harry and Nagini are TOTALLY BOTH HORCRUXES ONLY HARRY IS THE GOOD MAGIC KIND!

Comments

[ojuzu.livejournal.com]

"*ETA: Honestly, imagine if Steve Kloves got his wish and the books really were about Hermione. Every title would be: Hermione Granger and the...Oh, She's Solved It Already."

Really, though, if it was something like Death Note that would work very well. Actually...that would make one HELL of an awesome crossover. But I'm not entirely sure whether I'd put her on L's side or Raito's. (Or maybe she'd just team up with Matsuda and become one half of Pinky and the Brain.)

I want a link to that comic. It sounds like the sort of thing KTSHY would do.