HBP Chapter Twenty
Dec. 12th, 2008 10:19 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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deathtocapslock*Looking back, it’s pretty hilarious that Lord Voldemort’s request boils down to really really wanting to teach 7th grade. You’d expect it to be a demand for Harry to give up his soul to save some little Muggle girl or something.
*ETA: I was reading somebody the other day who pointed out that Voldemort's plans were much better when Dumbledore manipulated them. Like on his own Voldemort is just kind of an idiot and it's only with Dumbledore's help he creates this impression of scariness.
*Hermione is friends with Ron again, the best part of being poisoned. Does it ever bother Harry that his great Trio friendship has to so often rely on near-death experiences to stay intact?
*Harry comes across either Crabbe or Goyle examining the tapestry of trolls while guarding the RoR (cue fics where one of them starts creating tapestries himself or reveals one of the trolls is an ancestor!).
*She "looks terrified" of the approaching sixth years—which is cool because of course really he’s going, "Potter’s gang—shit!" ETA: This really is the kind of thing JKR does best.
*Ginny’s argued with Dean because he did a Harry impression that she is planning to do later on. It’s only funny when I do it, jerk. You’re not good enough friends with Harry to tease him. Only his Ideal Girl gets to do that! Stop trying to steal my thunder!
*ETA: Of course we all realize that Ginny being hypocritical and unfair is clearly showing how she's in love with Harry. (Seriously. That's what she's showing there.)
*Hermione hotly says that Harry getting hit didn’t look funny at all. Well, at least now we know what lies at the heart of Hermione and Ginny’s great friendship. They don’t just bond over guys, they met in the "Violence is only good when I say it is" club.
*Luna thinks Ron’s making fun of her by saying she gave good commentary. As if Luna doesn’t know Ron appreciates anyone saying anything against Zach Smith, the Evil Heart of Hogwarts.
*And Hermione makes yet another girl jealous. Guess that’s the price you pay for being best friends with the best people in school!
*Hermione, being in a good mood, writes the end of Harry’s essay for him, something she’d refused to do before because she knew he’d let Ron copy it. So to review, the only reason for Hermione to refuse to do Harry’s homework for him is because she wants to keep it from Ron. You can see why Hermione’s smirking in a superior way. Lavender wishes she was cool enough to have two boys let her do their homework for them.
*ETA: And also cook their meals, do their laundry and pack their underwear.
*ETA: Yeah, Harry and Ron are totally going to do great in the elite training program hardly anybody gets into on their own merits that allegedly deals with all these subjects.
*Harry finds Sybil with Dumbledore, complaining about Firenze. He hears her trip over her shawls on the way down the stairs. He does not chalk that up to her hilarious drinking problem, I guess because we haven’t gotten into the Slytherin part of the chapter yet.
*ETA: Does she get fired after DH? Or do they keep her around forever because that's what Dumbledore decided and good people always live their lives according to Dumbledore's orders even when he's dead?
*Dumbledore casually mentions how he’s made another one of his Dumbledore-ish-mistakes in not realizing how having two Divination teachers he’s personally protecting at the school would work out.
*ETA::sigh:: Poor Albus. He will just never learn to stop giving other people so much credit and autonomy. This is why he's the only one who can know anything and he has to make all the plans and tell everyone what to do.
*Dumbledore tells Harry Sybil doesn’t know about the prophecy she made, putting Harry in the delightful position of knowing a huge secret about a pathetic teacher that she herself does not know. That’s not demeaning to Trelawney at all, so let’s move on.
*ETA: Of course, Dumbledore is just protecting Sybil by not letting her know what's going on in her own life. Only super geniuses like Albus can handle this kind of sensitive information.
*Harry says no, he hasn’t gotten the memory from Slughorn and Dumbledore guilt trips him because it really is important that he gets the memory the exact way that Dumbledore wants it gotten. It’s fun making Harry plumb the depths of his cunning. Dance little schoolboy! Dance for me!
*Dumbledore continues guilt-tripping Harry about how he told him how important the memory is. For some reason Harry, who much of fandom considers to be completely rude and spoiled brat, does not tell Dumbledore that if it’s so important maybe he should just use his own best-wizard-of-all-time powers to get the memory instead of amusing himself making Harry do it whenever he’s got a minute between classes.
*ETA: I would say to imagine what Harry would do if Snape told him to do this, but of course Snape would do it himself to begin with, claiming that Harry's an idiot.
*It’s probably not a good sign that the moment when Harry feels an actual sense of shame is when I’m mentally snarking at Dumbledore for him. Probably because once again Dumbledore just seems to be demanding some pathetic show of personal loyalty. It’s not like this is the only way to get the memory, he’s just as usual wanting Harry to prove he’ll do what he says. You like me! You really like me!
*Maybe in the next book Harry and Draco can compare their experiences being shamed by a beloved authority figure.
*ETA: Err...nope. Harry will pretty much go on validating Albus' ego right off into death. The final book, in fact, is a veritable orgy of Albus-validation. That's the book where Dumbledore reveals the one thing in his life he's got a twinge of insecurity about so that Harry can tell him no man could have done better.
*Seriously, it's really creepy that the one time Harry feels ashamed of himself it's for believing he let Dumbledore down for this. The only lesson he learns to grow up is to listen to Dumbledore more.
*Dumbledore really starts piling it on thick when Harry apologizes, quietly daring to hope that Harry puts more thought into the project now that he’s remembered Dumbledore wants him to do that. Tell you what, Albus, I’ll get you that memory right after you get around to telling me what actually happened to your hand.
*ETA: Oh my god this chapter is SO CREEPY post-DH.
*Harry’s then EVEN MORE ashamed when Dumbledore OMG says he cares to hear his opinion on whether he’s right about Voldemort! He, like, totally values Harry’s opinion! God Dumbledore, enough already. Stick a fork in him, he’s done. You could tell him you thought Voldemort’s secret dream was to become the tooth fairy and he’d agree with your conclusions at this point, just to prove himself to you.
*Harry feels uncomfortable at Dumbledore’s description of how Voldemort feels about Hogwarts. Presumably because it was the first place he felt at home too and not because he’s more attached to it than he could ever be to any person…right?
*ETA: Ah, the whole "Lost Boys" idea that imo doesn't really work out. Especially when Harry starts roping Snape into it. Aww, me and Snape are totally the same! We're just innocent boys unfairly treated who found a home at Hogwarts. It's not like one of us lost his best friend here to the pack of boys who bullied him, became a Nazi and then was sentenced to prison here for the rest of his life against his will. We all just love the place and never want to leave!
*Slughorn and Voldemort were BFF, huh? I guess Tom Riddle knew the Good Slytherin when he saw him.
*Dumbledore, being all-knowing, was deeply disturbed at the idea of Tom teaching kids. Not that he told Dippet why he felt that way. Need to know basis, remember!
*Btw, Dumbledore’s all-knowingness does of course contain a certain blind spot. That blind spot’s name is…Señor Draco. (And it’s shaped like a sombrero.)
*There’s a big file in Dumbledore’s office of secrets he keeps from people for their own good: Dean’s father being a Wizard, Flitwick being adopted and part-goblin, Trelawney marked for death, Lord Voldemort’s true identity, some Hufflepuff second year dying of an incurable disease he doesn’t know about himself… ETA: The entire stupid plan to bring down Lord Voldemort.
*Harry drops into the memory of the female version of Slughorn—a fat, ridiculous and vain woman who collects things and who’s got no business slobbering over young Tom Riddle. Is it a coincidence these guys all appear in the same book? The magpie-like can not be trusted!
*Of course she’s a bit worse than Slughorn in that she’s wearing make-up, the last resort of those not pretty on the inside.
*Hokey tells Hephzibah she looks lovely. "Nyuh-uh girlfriend," Harry thinks to himself with a snap. His bitchy tirade about her looks is cut off by the stunning appearance of Young Tom Riddle. His hair’s just a little longer (Harry having noted it before) and his cheeks a little hollowed but oh, it suits him! He’s more handsome than ever!!
*ETA: Auror Headquarters, 2008. Harry Potter, Chief Auror, turned at the door to his office. "I don't want to be disturbed for at least an hour, Higglebottom," he told the young recruit in the tone of authority that came so naturally to him. "Important Auror business." He shut the door behind Higglebottom, locking it with a careless flick of his wand. Scanning the office for spying spells, he waved a hand over a spot on the floor, revealing a secret chamber, the kind commonly referred to as a "Malfoy Cubby." From this he removed a polished wooden box covered in ancient runes. "I solemnly swear I am the Chosen One." Harry whispered. There was a hint of music--goblin-made windchimes, to be exact, the kind that were now illegal--and the box opened. He took the dog-eared book from inside it and with a quick glance in his foe-glass, Chief Auror Potter began to read: "MY MOTHER DROVE ME TO THE AIRPORT WITH THE windows rolled down. It was seventy-five degrees in Phoenix, the sky a perfect, cloudless blue. I was wearing my favorite shirt —sleeveless, white eyelet lace; I was wearing it as a farewell gesture. My carry-on item was a parka..."
*Tom Riddle is dressed simply in a dark, probably designer, suit perfectly cut…Oops! Forgot Wizards wear robes again!
*Hephzibah simpers all over Tom. Harry physically restrains himself from screaming, "Get your piggy little hands off him, you sow!"
*Hephzibah’s eyes are fastened on Voldemort’s handsome features, so she doesn’t see the flash of evil red in his eyes like Harry, who was lost in his eyes at the time.
*The cup apparently has powers all on its own. *Makes note*
*ETA: Not that we ever see these powers that I remember.
*When Hephzibah looks into Voldemort’s face for the first time Harry sees her "foolish" smile falter. Harry is such a little bitch about this woman. I wonder why. Could you tell us, ever so handsome Tom?
*Dumbledore’s conclusions are totally validated when Harry draws the same ones after seeing the scene. As if showing someone this scene and telling them the woman was poisoned two days later wouldn’t make anyone say Tom did it even if he’d been innocent. Next show us a scene where Harry tells us how Draco’s up to something and must be stopped and then tell us Draco was eviscerated two days later and see what conclusions we draw.
*Harry suddenly feels sympathetic to SPEW, that thing Hermione harped on for two books straight and then inexplicably forgot, because Dumbledore says people were pre-disposed to suspect Hokey of the murder. He thinks this has something to do with her being "only a house-elf." Apparently Dumbledore hasn’t heard the cliché "the butler/maid did it."
*ETA: The whole "here's how good people think about House-Elves" will never stop being fabulous to me. The whole thing works perfectly if you just accept that slavery of basically humanoid creatures is acceptable in this world and the rightful way of things. If only it wasn't so darn hard to do that while also claiming it's anti-slavery in general.
*Btw, Harry’s sympathy towards SPEW does not lead him to be uncomfortable with his own slave. Luckily. Because while SPEW used to sound like an abolitionist movement it's now more like the RSPCA and Harry's a great owner.
*Dumbledore again subtly and sadly points out the terrible justice system in the WW without defending his own part in it. Such a tragedy about Sirius. There was nothing I could do. I was too busy turning down three offers to be Minister for Magic and Head of the Wizengamot at the same time.
*Dumbledore says he’s got other reasons for thinking Voldemort wanted the cup…does he ever get to that either in this book?
*ETA: I guess Dumbledore is just talking about the Horcrux with that? It's just that it's so dragged out I assumed everyone understood that reason by now? There's nothing about Voldemort's plan with this stuff that isn't obvious by now except how Harry's going to find and destroy these things, and those will be explained on the fly in DH.
*Harry goes into Voldemort’s memory where—gasp! Voldemort’s spoiling his looks! He’s not handsome anymore! Where has the pretteh gone??!!
*Luckily he’s still got a certain reptilian sensuality Harry can dig.
*Harry understands that Dumbledore’s refusal to call Tom "Lord Voldemort" shows that he’s not allowing Tom to dictate the terms of their meeting. Like this is surprising after his scene with the Dursleys.
*ETA: It also shows that Dumbledore won't give the WW in general that same ability to dictate the terms of their interactions with Voldemort. Sure Dumbledore can treat him like a regular Wizard, but that's because Dumbledore is his superior. The masses need to whisper his name in fear.
*Voldemort reminds us Dumbledore could totally be MoM if he wanted, and Dumbledore says he’d rather be a schoolteacher…for the same reason Voldemort wants to be. Comforting, yes?
*Dumbledore reminds Voldemort that he still knows nothing of love. Voldemort says nothing he’s seen proves that love is so powerful. Apparently he’s been reading the books and wondering why, if our heroes are so loving, the only way friends ever manage to make up after a fight is if one of them almost dies.
*ETA: Btw, the power of love? Not what vanquishes Voldemort. It's the specific power of the Elder Wand and how it's working the moment it's in his hands that Voldemort knows not.
*Dumbledore says he’s glad Voldemort considers the DEs friends, as they seemed more like servants. Though to be fair, Gryffindors generally assume everyone else’s friends "seem like" something other than friends. Calling other peoples’ friendships that is like anthropomorphizing animals: the Slytherins appear to be chatting as friends do, but if you look closely Pansy is picking nits out of Draco’s hair while Goyle rolls over and submissively urinates.
*Dumbledore says Voldemort can’t teach at Hogwarts because he doesn’t really want to. Unlike Albus who's 100% committed to his students getting a good education.
Slytherin Liquid Count: Pensieve Water, Dumbledore and Tom drink wine, Hephzibah and Voldemort drink together, Hephzibah drinks poisoned tea.
Hottie Factor: Tom Riddle, more handsome than ever!
Box Picture
And Shelly Winters as the fat woman!
Designated Hero
Sometimes when a boy likes a girl very much, it’s important for him to screw around with another girl to get experience. Similarly, if a boy is a hero whose greatest power is his love for others, it’s important that he gets some experience manipulating old guys. Especially old guys' love for young dead girls.
IITS
Yes, as it happens I really do need the 16-year-old boy who couldn’t learn Occlumency to come up with a clever plan to wheedle a memory out of his teacher. No, I can’t do it myself. It says so right here in the script: Demonstrate Liquid Luck before final battle.
Informed Attributes
Harry didn’t want to disappoint Dumbledore, since after all the guy has been so good to him and never asks anything of him at all except this one little thing. It's not like he's planning on Harry's death without telling him or anything.
James Bond Exposition Rule
There should be some amendment to this rule when the superhero spends chapter after chapter dragging out his own revelation of the villain’s master plan.
Misdirected Answering
Is it really going to be important will it be that Voldemort wanted the DADA teacher job? ETA: Nope.
Final score: 6
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Part 2 - Why Harry HAS to get the memory
Date: 2008-12-12 07:25 pm (UTC)- I'm a fan w*nker of vast magnitude, but even I have nothing when it comes to Harry having to get the memory from Slughorn. Why not ask Snape? Obviously Slughorn would lie, but I'm sure Snape could read the truth in his mind, being a MIND READER. I'll try though.
- I said before that Dumbledore should have had two years to live. He could have told Harry that after he turned 17, they'd have some intensive lessons about Horcruxes, which weren't a subject for children, and HOW TO DESTROY THEM. In the meantime, he'd tell him some basic, background information and get him involved in other ways. Trying to get Slughorn's memory would be a test of sorts - great practice in the sort of subterfuge which Harry would need in the future. If it didn't work, Dumbledore would ask Snape, or make his own arrangements, but he'd rather Harry try first, after all, subtlety wasn't his strong point, and he could hardly rely on Miss Granger forever. Ho ho ho!
- Dumbles could say that if anything happened to him before these lessons, he'd left a package containing 'everything you ever wanted to know about Horcruxes but were afraid to ask' with Snape, who he totally trusted. Another fan w*nking suggestion of mine was that the reason why Dumbles didn't want any adults on the Horcrux hunt was that he worried that they would work out Harry's little problem and try to stop him going to his death. In that situation, Snape would probably make him sandwiches for the journey.
- In DH, Harry wouldn't trust Snape, understandably for once. He'd never try to contact him for help, and therefore all the information and clues that Dumbles had painstakenly collected (because he wasn't such a b*stard as to leave him helpless with such a vital and massive job to do) would be out of Harry's reach. That'd make a lot more sense than what JKR gave us. Honestly, JKR did far more to destroy Dumbles' character than Rita Skeeter.
I know it's average, but it's more than JKR bothered to do. How could she come up with all of this, get millions of people interested in her characters than just stop making the effort? Unless her sense was eaten away by fame and she genuinely thinks these are great books.
Also, Harry is always a little bitch. He and Ginny must be such a lovely couple.
Re: Part 2 - Why Harry HAS to get the memory
Date: 2008-12-12 07:36 pm (UTC)In Harry's 6th year, give him the basic Tom information, and a practical lesson on finding a Horcrux, followed by a practical lesson destroying it. Then, expire gracefully, after instructing Harry to continue getting information from Snape (helping to locating the other Horcruxes and building up enough trust for Snape to deliver the final message.) In the down time, Harry could puzzle out that Hallows stuff.
But the poison changed plans a bit, so he wanted Snape there when he died in order to at least provide a bonding moment, and the instructions about getting information, and hopefully having Snape help destroy that pesky locket. In this case, Harry would probably have ended up as the Master of the Elder Wand, which would be a good thing.
Then Draco ruins it by getting the mastery and interrupting Operation Die Gracefully. Instead, Dumbledore has to stall and hope that Snape arrives in time...
And it ruins the whole "reconcile Snape and Harry" plan. Hmm... Maybe Dumbledore would have done better to wait fifteen minutes before going on the Horcrux Hunt to deal with Harry's emotions and bring Snape in settle that matter before they left.
Re: Part 2 - Why Harry HAS to get the memory
Date: 2008-12-12 09:56 pm (UTC)***Or with McGonagall, whom both Harry and DD trusted? I was furious with JKR through OotP for not letting McG give Harry some real advice and explanations. But that would ruin The Plot, sorry
Re: Part 2 - Why Harry HAS to get the memory
Date: 2008-12-12 10:38 pm (UTC)Re: Part 2 - Why Harry HAS to get the memory
Date: 2008-12-13 05:19 pm (UTC)I imagine Harry and Ginny being the terror of parent/child gatherings.