HBP Chapter One

[biichan.livejournal.com]

-- First of all, I'd really like to know who the Prime Minister is meant to be. I mean, is he just a generic prime minister? Or is he a Real Person being 'Cleverly Disguised' by Rowling? If you go by the date you get in CoS at Sir Nicolas' deathday, it would be the fall of 1996 which means the PM would be John Majors, but what if she meant it to be Blair? Sigh. Maths. JKR's maths.

-- Nowhere does it say that the President that is giving the PM his headache is the American one. Possibly, he's from some other democracy. Or Clinton was hitting on Mrs Majors.

-- Hurricanes. Right. So where does the rain come from, giant drool? Ew.

-- He threw Fudge out the window? Um. I'd heard Maggie Thatcher was a bit butch but that's taking it a little too far.

-- "Serious." "Kwidditch." Hah hah hah. I'm shaking in my boots, really. (Not.) But seriously, I think I like the spelling Kwidditch better.

-- You have to feel sorry for the PM. He's in way over his head. So... who appoints the Minister of Magic anyway?

-- Dementor sex. Dementors... fugging. In a writing career of batshit ideas, the Great Dementor Spawning definitely takes the cake. I wonder if they have anything to do with Muggle clinical depressiveness levels.

-- Remember how when JKR first unearthed that quote about Lion Dude and we all thought he'd be really important? Like maybe the new Defence master or Godric Gryffindor or the Heir of Gryffindor or something like that? And he's just another politician put there to illustrate how the ministry uses Harry. Man, JKR gypped us.

-- I can't be the only one that is now picturing Kingsley in pearls and high-heels, am I? (I know he's not that kind of secretary. But one can wish.) Speaking of which, PM/Kingsley anybody?

-- "The trouble is, the other side can do magic too, Prime Minister." Was that meant to be horribly profound? Because it wasn't, really.


Box Picture: John Majors (or maybe Tony Blair) is THE MINISTER. Cornelius Fudge is THE OTHER MINISTER. And Rufus Scrimgeour is THE OTHER OTHER MINISTER.

Exploitation Filmmakers’ Credo: Oh, I'm sure you can't remember the last three books anyway. Have some exposition.

Nut o’ Fun: The talking portrait in the PM's office. That must be related to Sirius' mum somehow 'cause he won't budge.

POV Shots: The PM. For the whole chapter.

Whooshing Powder: In the wizarding world, we call this floo powder.

Unfortunately, our brave PM doesn't bring quite so much snark as the wizards do. Think it's a co-incidence?

Comments

[twirlability.livejournal.com]

Dementor sex. Dementors... fugging. In a writing career of batshit ideas, the Great Dementor Spawning definitely takes the cake. I wonder if they have anything to do with Muggle clinical depressiveness levels.

Maybe this is why Tom Cruise is being so nutty. 'Everytime someone goes on Paxil, a Dementor is born...'

[biichan.livejournal.com]

It's all a plot by XENU!!!

Seriously. They should add that to their questionaire: "Have you ever been employed to digest and eradicate the immortal souls of convicted criminals?"

[glorfindelghost.livejournal.com]

The Dementor breeding may be my entire highlight of the whole series (and it had stiff competition in this book, what with the zombies and all). Its just...wonderfully batshit crazy (although I had always wondered how dementors were created).

And Tom Cruise? Always that insane, just in a rather less high profile way, I think...