PoA Chapter Four

[sistermagpie.livejournal.com]

Since Diagon Alley is full of the most fascinating wizarding shops in the world, Harry has no desire to venture into Muggle London. He’s got a robe shop, broom shop and an ice cream parlor.

Harry likes eating breakfast in the Cauldron and watching the other customers. Almost as if he’s a curious boy with interest in the world around him. I’m thinking Dumbledore must have slipped him something to kill this once he got to school.

One of the people Harry sees is someone who looked “suspiciously like a hag” ordering from behind a baklava. Perhaps Marietta looked suspiciously like a hag in her baklava too.

Btw, are hags yet another creature that aren’t fit for polite society from birth?

Harry also gets free sundaes every half an hour. Wow. Does he look a little more like Dudley by the end of the week or what?

Harry’s tempted to buy himself a set of solid gold gobstones. Luckily just in time he remembers that he doesn’t actually play gobstones.

Harry’s metabolism is no doubt as far-seeing as his financial sense. He won’t be getting fat no matter how many sundaes he eats.

Gobstones squirt nasty-smelling liquid into the other player’s faces when they lose a point. Honestly, for all the claims of how great it is, the wizarding world mostly tastes and smells terrible all the time.

Harry also gets his first look at the best broom ever. What do you think the chances are he’ll get one of these Firebolt things by the end of the book like last time?

Not that this great broom will in any way give Harry an unearned advantage over any other Seeker, of course. Our brooms, like our choices, simply show who we are.

LOL! There’s something wonderful about Harry reminding himself that it’s not like he’s ever lost a Quidditch match on his Nimbus 2000. He might as well have reminded himself that he never seems to lose at anything, really. To be fair, he hasn’t yet entered the TWT.

The bookstore manager has already been bitten several times in one morning by Hagrid’s stupid book. Nice to know Hagrid’s powers of irritation are just that powerful.

Harry’s eye falls on a book about death omens that has a picture of a black dog on the cover, thus neatly making his vision of Sirius look like an omen. Well done there.

Other kids pop up at Diagon Alley, like Dean and Seamus. Harry also sees Neville, but doesn’t stop to chat. Shock.

Arthur has of course heard all about what happened to Aunt Marge. He was probably disappointed he didn’t get a chance to cover that up for Harry himself.

Hermione says Harry’s blowing up his aunt isn’t funny. After all, she’s amazed he wasn’t expelled. Nice foreshadowing of Hermione’s take on the Sectumsempra issue.

The Weasleys are randomly staying at the Cauldron this year because Harry is. (Maybe they’re afraid he’ll get adopted by some other family if they leave him alone another minute.)

Let me guess, will Hermione be staying too? Why yes, she is! Her parents obediently dropped her off by herself at a hotel. Maybe she just lied and told them she had to be there early.

Hermione is taking Muggle studies because she thinks it will be fascinating to see them from the wizard pov. If by “fascinating” you mean infuriating and condescending, I guess.

Hermione’s got extra money because it’s her birthday in September. I know that note’s for us but it almost makes it sound like it’s new information for Ron and Harry. Or at least Harry, whose birthday is the only important one until Ron almost gets killed on his. (Though after that one the Weasleys probably started celebrating it as the anniversary of the time Harry saved Ron rather than Ron’s birthday.)

Hermione says she wants an owl, which gives Ron a reason to pull Scabbers out of his pocket and note he’s looking droopy. He thinks because Egypt didn’t agree with him, but of course really it’s because he’s scared of Sirius!

It also gives us a reason to go to a pet shop: Animals are Important in this Book!

They go to the pet shop, which is also foul-smelling. The clerk makes a point of helping someone else so they have time to look around and give us a nice long descriptive paragraph.

Like nearly everything Ron owns, Scabbers is second-hand. Hey, he finally got a new wand, didn’t he? It’s not even pre-owned!

The witch asks what powers Scabbers has. So are all magical familiars supposed to have powers? I guess Hedwig’s ability to care whether or not Harry has a happy birthday doesn’t count?

The witch says an ordinary garden rat can’t be expected to live more than three or four years. Well, obviously, there’s his power!

So Hermione chooses to buy the cat that attacks Ron’s rat on sight. Yup, that neatly fits their pattern all right. Not exactly optimistic symbolism for that marriage.

Black’s not going to be caught by a 13-year-old wizard, Arthur says, a line that sounds incredibly silly given that you’d think a world war wouldn’t be fought and won by a 17-year-old wizard and his idiot friends, and yet it will.

Ginny goes red and mutters hello to Harry without looking at him. It’s amazing the way that if you look back at past books, Peter’s true personality is actually clear in Scabbers and Barty Crouch’s true personality is clear in Fake!Moody…yet the fantastical Ginny of OotP and HBP remains completely hidden. I mean, it’s not even like Harry walks in on something that looks like Ginny being clumsy but on re-read is clearly Ginny having just beaten all her brothers into submission or something.

If only Colin Creevey had been tongue-tied instead of babbling he might have been given a new, awesome personality too.

Percy greets Harry as if they’ve never met, which makes Harry almost laugh instead of get angry and judgmental. Weird, isn’t it?

Percy, of course, can’t hide his personality. He’s already been smug and pompous and he’s just appeared on the page.

Fred and George jump in to elaborately make fun of Percy for Harry.

George is revolted at the idea of being a Prefect, because it would take all the fun out of life, and Ginny giggles. I guess there’s our Big Clue to the firecracker within.

The twins also tried to shut Percy in a pyramid in Egypt. They’re so funny and awesome.

Everyone eats their way through 5 courses at dinner. I’m so glad we’re away from the fat people so we can get down to enjoying all this good food!

Percy curiously asks why the Ministry’s sending cars for their family and George says it’s because of Percy, and they’ll have little flags that say HB for…wait for it…Humongous Bighead! Fred adds that! That’s hilarious! Are these boys really only 15?

So the car for Arthur is “doing him a favor” because he doesn’t have a car anymore. That would be because his car was illegal and his kid lost it. If there’s one thing that says poor, it’s fleets of government cars taking your kids to school, yeah?

Still, it’s nice of the Ministry to do something to make up for Arthur losing his totally illegal car that specifically went against his own area of law enforcement. I doubt anybody in the Muggle world would be that thoughtful.

Arthur feels it makes no sense not to tell Harry he’s in grave danger. Naturally he won’t be winning this argument. Nobody ever tells Harry anything he should obviously know. Though to be fair, Harry never actually seems to want to know anything he should obviously know.

Since Arthur’s not going to tell Harry anything, he resorts to having a loud, angry “As you know, Bob” conversation with Molly while Harry’s listening.

So to bring us up to date: Sirius muttered “He’s at Hogwarts” in his sleep, which everyone assumes refers to Harry because honestly, who the hell cares about any other single person at Hogwarts even if you’re not in jail for killing Harry’s parents?

Molly says Dumbledore would never let anything hurt Harry at Hogwarts, even though Harry’s already almost died at Hogwarts twice in the two years he’s been there.

It turns out Fred and George actually stole Percy’s badge to change it to read “Bighead Boy.” Just as Harry is protected from the harsh reality that everyone thinks Sirius is after him, apparently the twins are kept from the harsh reality that they are pretty much lacking in wit.

Like, remember that scene in Annie Hall where little Alvy has to deal with “Joey Nickles” and his allegedly hilarious jokes? And even though he’s a small child he just wanders away saying, “What an asshole?” I see a lot of that in the Twins’ future.

Harry thinks maybe Sirius should be afraid of Dumbledore since Voldemort was. Nope, one of Sirius’ most appealing qualities was that he wasn’t afraid of Dumbledore. Which is also pretty much why he spent his life in prison and then died young, really.

Worst of everything, of course, is that Harry can’t go to Hogsmeade. Um, yeah. That’s definitely the worst thing about finding out a mass murderer is gunning for you. No unchaperoned trips to the bug, grass and vomit-flavored candy store!

Harry vows not to be murdered. And I have to appreciate Harry coming up with even that vague of a plan. Nobody can accuse him of not fulfilling at least that goal.

Things done twice:

Harry sees a second incredible broom he’ll soon own.

Hermione is attracted to a cat that attacks people, thus becoming another pet owner like Marge and Hagrid.

Harry’s kept out of the loop on a big secret about himself throughout a whole book, much like OotP.

Fred and George fix Percy’s badge to say something different. The badge technology in GoF does NOT come out of nowhere!

It’s a gun. No it isn’t! It’s Chekov! No it isn’t!

Firebolt
Status: Fired, just in the way you’d expect.

Arthur says the Ministry is no nearer catching Black than inventing self-spelling wands
Status: Fired, and we didn’t even know it was a gun!
Hey, Arthur, Harry’s already got one of those! It’s just waiting until the seventh book to randomly reveal itself!





Exploitation Filmmakers’ Credo
If Molly didn’t follow this credo her husband would have no reason to exposit information he’s already told her for Harry’s benefit.

Hero’s Death Battle Exemption
Harry reminds all those people, in his head, how wonderfully he’s managed to keep himself alive so far. It’s good to have your name in the title!

Idiot World
Arthur says the Ministry’s pulled people them all off their regular jobs to find Sirius. I love that the Ministry is so useless they would look for a fugitive by deputizing a bunch of accountants (without the accountants doing anything useful like checking financial transactions that could lead them to Sirius, of course.)

Spring-Loaded Cat
Hey, an actual spring-loaded cat!

Jabootu Score: 4

Comments

[jodel-from-aol.livejournal.com]

I say that the rot set in with book 4. That whole episode was based on a faulty premise, and she admitted later falling into a plot hole in that one -- to the point of having to rewrite close to a third of the book. I just don't believe that the hole she admits to was really what gave her all the trouble.

But at that point she still had a lot of ideas that she had actually *thought* about, so she was able to cobble something together that got her to the end of that particular volume. However, that volume is where the bloat set in. Not that GoF was obviously padded, because it wasn't. But she was suddenly moving beyond a place where she had established the groundwork and suddenly found herself having to add all kinds of new stuff in. And she hadn't allowed for how much of it there was, nor how much work it was going to be to fit it in.

In retrospect, although GoF really was not padded, it also was not especially relevant, since by the time we got to the end of it we were heading off into terra incognita, and pretty much nothing that she was pointing at when that sequence finished was anything that ever actually went anywhere.

OotP *was* padded. She still had some of her original ideas when she started that one, but they only got her part way through it, and from that point on she was flailing. The whole series effectively ran out of gas by the time Harry rode Nagini into the DoM and watched Arthur get bitten. The post script to that sequence was checking off the list items of; "get to DoM", "kill Sirius", and "tell Prophecy". Everything else in the whole back half of that book was an effectless distraction designed to stretch the action out to the end of the year.

[oryx_leucoryx]

I know you dislike the plot-holes that remained in GOF, but I think most of them can be worked around, including the Polyjuice business. What I like most about GOF is that it is possible to reread it from different POVs - Dumbledore's, Severus' - each acting on different partial information and with different assumptions (Albus believing Harry, Severus believing Harry was lying when he said he did not put his name in the Goblet) and work out what each of them was thinking. (BTW my conclusions are different from the ones you arrive at in 'Hostage to Misfortune', but then I'm working with ruthless DH Dumbles, yet giving him the benefit of doubt in some ways.)

[sunnyskywalker]

GoF is where I start noticing the plotholes that could have been fixed with minor tweaks, for the most part. Just have someone relevant mention that the resurrection takes 10 months to brew, or the ceremony must occur at the summer solstice, and at least we've got that timing cleared up. Have the maze be viewable to the audience so they can see Harry disappear when he touches the cup so they can panic, since Voldemort supposedly likes to cause mass panic. Then there would be an actual reason to put Harry in the tournament. We could still poke holes in that reason, but at least it's something. It also could wreck the whole "no one believes Voldemort's back" part of OotP, unless she worked out a way to have Voldemort cover by making it look like Harry rigged the cup and killed Cedric, or got Cedric accidentally killed via some dangerous whatsit they encountered on the other side, which Dumbledore could get Harry out of at trial. Or something. Anything.

After that, the plot holes got too big to fill pretty quickly.

[jodel-from-aol.livejournal.com]

Well, I always thought that planting the maze in the Quidditch Pitch was so people couldsee doen into it from the stands. Much like I expected that what was going on underwater in the lake was being magically shown on the surface for the spectatoprs. But Rowling never tells us that the spectators ever did anything but sit there where they could see nothing whatsoever of interest. Which is where the flawed premise of the whole Tournament comes in.

If, as Rowling claims, the book was *supposed* to be the one in which Harry had to come to grips with the fact that he is a celebrity, and people are *not* going to leave him alone to live his life in private, I cannot say that she effectively showed us Harry doing anything of the sort. We saw him being hounded by Rita and Hermione slapping Rita down (without consequences, which is pure wish-fulfillment) nd that was presumably the ed of it. We don't even see Harry gaining any real understanding that this is going to keep on happening, and he has a choice of whether to use it or not -- since she never brings him to the point of ever even considering making deliberate use of it. So we never really even get the message that he suffered any actual "temptation" of fame, or understanding that fame is also a tool. In which case he comes across as a bit of a dork. Fortunately he is still young enough to get away with that in GoF. But as the series goes on, the only thing he seems to have learned from the year is a handful of hexes and what a Pensieve is for.

The book's only real purpose appears, in retrospect, to be to bring Tom back into play, and everything else in it seems either singularly pointless, or was sonething that Rowling felt she had to redo before the series was over, and she didn't do it better.

[oryx_leucoryx]

I know people don't like that Barty waited for the third task to make a Portkey, but IMO it shouldn't be possible at normal times to make Portkeys to and from Hogwarts, except with the headmaster's permission. Because otherwise the whole security measure of inability to Apparate to and from Hogwarts would be pointless. And GOF is the book where Hermione starts reminding people about this bit. So Rowling should have had her mention Portkeys as well. Since the headmaster can alter the Apparation protections he should be able to alter the Portkey protections as well. Indeed all Portkeys we see being used to and from Hogwarts are either approved by Dumbledore (Triwizard Cup) or made by him (twice in OOTP). Also, if Portkeys to Hogwarts were possible without the headmaster's approval Draco's cabinet repair project in HBP would be a bit superfluous.

So Barty's options were: Lure Harry out of the anti-Apparation wards and Portkey/side-along him away; lure him away from his friends while they are all visiting Hogsmeade and Portkey/side-along him from there or use the Triwizard cup, which was intended to be a Portkey all along. But Portkeying him from Barty's office is IMO out.

[sistermagpie.livejournal.com]

Even if we assume that Barty can't just hand him something in his office getting Harry alone in Hogsmeade or anywhere is just so obviously more sensible. By making it the Triwizard cup Barty literally spends the year trying to help Harry get around incredible obstacles that he himself put between Harry and the very thing Barty's goal is to have him touch.

In a way, the best thing about Dumbledore's plan in DH is that it kicks Barty's plan out of the top spot in the "plans that shouldn't have a chance in hell of working" spot.

[sunnyskywalker]

We'd have to combine explanations to make it work - the potion takes ten months to brew/must be finished at the solstice AND the tasks are the only time the anti-portkey wards are down. It's getting creaky and ridiculous, but still workable if JKR hadn't gotten so caught up with things that ultimately don't matter, like SPEW.

There musts be some sort of wizarding graduate program for Scholars of Absurdly Convoluted Plots. Barty was all but dissertation, while Dumbledore and Voldemort were engaged in the academic rivalry of the century.

[oryx_leucoryx]

Severus has detailed notes criticizing the course in the margins of a book. Draco took the beginners' curriculum.

[seductivedark.livejournal.com]

It would make sense to lower the anti-Apparition and anti-Portkey wards for the TWT, at least by the venues. So many people would be coming to watch that shunting them straight to the bleachers would be the best idea and cut down on possible sightings by Muggles of strangely-dressed people heading to an unimportant ruin. Though I'm sure Hogsmeade vendors would like the business, they could probably set up kiosks on the grounds.

Heck, the vendors probably did. Why didn't we see it?

academic rivalry of the century

[terri-testing.livejournal.com]

Snorts tea onto the keyboard.

So, er, who was ahead on points?

Re: academic rivalry of the century

[oryx_leucoryx]

I'm wondering to what degree Albus was plagiarizing Gellert's notes (and who else's?). He seemed to be at beginners' level well past middle-age.

Re: academic rivalry of the century

[sunnyskywalker]

Well, Voldemort was racking up points with his "slowly gain control of wizarding Britian over several decades while becoming immortal" project, but he fell behind when he bombed that "kill a helpless baby" test, which should have been a gimme. After that Dumbledore controlled Hogwarts, was a major figure on the international scene, after a few years had Minister Fudge owling him for advice every day, and had Harry placed where he would be kept away from non-Dumbledore wizarding influences and would hate the Muggle world, setting him up to be Dumbledore's pawn - a position cemented when Harry got through all the tests protecting the Stone and didn't blame Dumbledore for anything that had happened that year (like not noticing VOLDEMORT IN A TEACHER'S HEAD, as far as Harry knew). He was well-placed for all the ridiculous plots he wanted, and had lots of people owing him favors (Hagrid, Lupin...) to help him.

Then it was back and forth for a while, especially after Pettigrew became Voldemort's assistant...

Re: academic rivalry of the century

[sistermagpie.livejournal.com]

like not noticing VOLDEMORT IN A TEACHER'S HEAD, as far as Harry knew

My favorite moment like this is in OotP when Harry sniffs at Percy's idiocy at not realizing that he's boss, with whom he has a rather distant professional relationship, is being controlled by Voldemort while simultaneously not blaming Dumbledore at all for not noticing that his good friend of many years that he's living with at school is actually not even the same person.

Re: academic rivalry of the century

[oryx_leucoryx]

I wonder if Harry blames Percy for not noticing Scabbers wasn't a normal rat (never mind that neither did Ron, or their parents, or anyone else).

Re: academic rivalry of the century

[sunnyskywalker]

For that matter, Crouch was at the Tournament at the beginning, and nobody noticed anything other than perhaps that he was a little stressed, and who wouldn't be with an employee going missing and a huge international sporting event to plan? True, Percy saw Crouch more often... but they weren't close friends, he hadn't really known him until recently, and Dumbledore, Bagman, et al. had certainly known him longer.

Re: academic rivalry of the century

[oryx_leucoryx]

Yes, for some reason an 18-year-old new employee is supposed to notice his boss is acting in an unusual manner? Crouch was the head of a large department. There were many people who knew him for years who should have been more aware of what was and what wasn't typical of him. It's not like someone in his position sits alone in an office with just his personal assistant around. He attends meetings, talks to the Minister, other department heads. If as Sirius said it was extremely unusual for Crouch to be absent at all Fudge, Umbridge and the others should have realized something was up. I tend to think the investigation against Percy was originally ass-covering for Fudge and friends. Then they played bad-cop good-cop with him with the promotion.

Re: academic rivalry of the century

[lynn-waterfall.livejournal.com]

Actually, regarding that investigation... the thing is, *George* is the one to tell us about it. "Percy got into a load of trouble about Crouch, there was an inquiry and everything. They said Percy ought to have realised Crouch was off his rocker and informed a superior."

I'm sure there was an inquiry, but I honestly do wonder whether it was really all about Percy. George would have gotten this info secondhand himself (at best, assuming his father didn't get it secondhand himself), and he's hardly unbiased. This is the same person who, moments earlier, said:

"I think weʹre well shot of him," said George, with an uncharacteristically ugly look on his face.

So no doubt there was an inquiry, and Percy would certainly have been involved in that, as part of trying to find out what exactly happened. The fact that they offered him a promotion afterwards, though, might actually suggest that the investigation *didn't* find Percy to be particularly at fault, and that his competence at managing things in the absence of his superior was recognized. Crouch had been owling him instructions, but no amount of instructions can guide you through everything, after all.

Re: academic rivalry of the century

[oryx_leucoryx]

First mention of the investigation is by Molly in GOF, chapter 31. "The Ministry wants to keep Mr Crouch's disappearance quiet, but Percy's been hauled in for questioning about the instructions Mr Crouch has been sending in. They seem to think there's a chance they weren't genuinely written by him. Percy's been under a lot of strain. They're not letting him fill in for Mr Crouch as the fifth judge tonight. Cornelius Fudge is going to be doing it."

But of course Percy was proud of being Crouch's replacement and stand-in for months, so everyone knew Crouch was absent. They only started wondering when he was seen at Hogwarts and disappeared. I agree that the promotion can be seen as an acknowledgment of Percy's competence. It can also be an attempt to shut him up about the details of the Crouch story or the details of the investigation.

Re: academic rivalry of the century

[sunnyskywalker]

It also could have started as an ass-covering inquiry when Fudge et al. realized they totally should have caught this, but there's a handy assistant to pin it on. Then they discovered he'd actually run the department competently for months and decided they might want to keep him around. So they promoted him to keep him quiet, to keep a useful employee, and to show everyone that no one at the Ministry was at fault here, no way! How could anyone have known? Good thing we had young Percy here or it could have been so much worse!

And it occurs to me that maybe Umbridge as well as Fudge supported Percy (because they both should have noticed and didn't, so finding Percy at fault would ultimately reflect badly on them). This could account for Percy writing next year that Umbridge was a perfectly lovely woman - thinking she stuck her neck out to defend his innocence out of a sense of justice could help blind him to her faults, after all. Especially since they wouldn't have actually spent much time together, probably.

Re: academic rivalry of the century

[oryx_leucoryx]

Not that we know what faults of Umbridge people should have noticed from the Ministry side. She wasn't making them write reports with the torture quill. (I like Jodel's suggestion that Umbridge reminded Percy of Molly.)

Re: academic rivalry of the century

[sunnyskywalker]

Very true. She only goes after people she perceives as much less powerful, and even then mostly when she isn't being watched or when she thinks she's persuaded everyone to agree with her. Most of the department heads probably had no idea about her sadistic streak, and why would they?

She does strike me as someone who could come off as Molly-ish while on her best behavior, too. I like that suggestion.

Re: academic rivalry of the century

[lynn-waterfall.livejournal.com]

I'd forgotten that bit in GoF; thanks for pointing it out. I don't think that anything there contradicts my interpretation, though. Naturally, Percy would be questioned, since he was the one who Crouch had assigned to run the department in his absence.

Percy would be under a strain just from hearing that Crouch was really missing -- after all, he admired Crouch. Being questioned in an official investigation would also be stressful. The people running the investigation wouldn't have to blame Percy in particular for anything to put him under a lot of stress.

Fudge's taking over the judging probably doesn't imply anything about Percy, either. It could be a simple as realizing that for the final event, someone more senior than Percy should stand in for Crouch. Or Fudge could want to be seen to be "taking charge" of something following Crouch's disappearance, even if it was something that small.

It still looks to me like we only have George's word that Percy was particularly in trouble with the Ministry, at any point.