Chapter Thirty

[sassafras-root.livejournal.com]

I'm posting this early (hey, it's Friday over here, now that's it's past midnight) because I'll probably be too lazy to do it tomorrow. I'm kind of nervous posting this here, but I already said I would, so here we go. Beware, it's not too terribly enlightening-I loathe this chapter so much.


*Due to Hogwarts not being safe because Dumbledore’s gone, kids are getting pulled out of Hogwarts left and right. Except for the good ones-look, undesirables Zacharias and the girly Patil twins have already left. Pfft, cowards.

*You know, I feel bad for Lavender here. She was upset from her break up with Ron and now her best friend Parvati has left the school too. Times like these make me really feel the minor character love. Oh wait, she deserves it for having a friendship that doesn’t revolve around getting guys. I’m assuming Lavender is still there because her parents are probably Muggles-they don’t need to know anything. Bless their little Muggle socks.

*Zacharias Smith’s father looks haughty, which I guess is supposed to make us think “like father, like son”. Remember kids, blood doesn’t mean anything! It’s all about our choices!

*Wow, can you believe Mrs. Finnigan? First, she worries about Seamus in OotP, now she’s trying to take him home after a Hogwarts death? What kind of pinko commie world does she think this is?

*Seamus, of course, has to fight with her in the entrance hall in pure Gryffindor fashion (bet their voices carried, being in a hall and all). See how brave they are? Wussy Slytherins probably meekly followed their evil concerned parents home. Geez, leaving Hogwarts doesn’t mean they can’t come back for the funeral. Are the people who stayed back so noble or something?

*Madame Maxime throws herself into Hagrid’s waiting arms, which basically sums up every major romance in this book in a nutshell.

*Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny are spending all their time together. Neville and Luna, despite pathetically watching their coins all year so they could risk their lives for TBWL, are out of sight, out of mind. Somehow knocking out a mountain troll means the Trio are destined to be friends for life, while risking your life for Harry twice means you get a pity date to a lame Christmas party.

*To be honest, I’m glad the sextet didn’t happen here. Look what happened to Ginny in order for Harry to notice her for more than five seconds. I’ll vomit if Neville and Luna need to be “spunkified” to fight in book seven. Well, it would beat the pathetic “We’re not worthy of your great friendship, O Chosen One!”

*LOL, even the beautiful weather is mocking Harry, reminding him of all the good times he’d be having if Dumbledore were still alive. It probably all comes back to Snape again-damn you, Snape, for depriving Harry of even more sunlit days!

*Ginny is Harry’s greatest source of comfort, and it’s supposed to be cute, despite them never having had a serious conversation. You know, marijuana is the greatest source of comfort for plenty of people-doesn’t mean it’s good.

*Bill resembles Mad-Eye Moody, yet is still the same in personality. Wait…personality? I wasn’t aware he had one, aside from bad 80s rocker wannabe.

*Ginny’s just going to have to accept that Bill is marrying Fleur. Wow, that’s big of her. She’s so compassionate! Surely such a wretch as Fleur does not deserve the redheaded one’s benediction! *weeps*

*I love how Harry has to “hastily” add that Fleur is ugly (yeah, right, who’s going to believe that?) because ZOMG Ginny raised her *eyebrows*! The boy who will defeat the Dark Lord, ladies and gentlemen!

*Wasn’t Harry reassuring Ginny that Fleur was ugly such a lovely moment in romance? All girls need is for their ideal man to slag off other girls and call them ugly! Well, I guess that’s how we know Ginny’s “the right girl” by her scorn for other “silly females”. Tee-hee!

*I love how when the conversation gets serious, Ginny yawns and heads of to bed. She probably sensed that her role wasn’t required to do anything else but sit at Harry’s feet.

*Eileen Prince was teh ugly! Just like Merope! Good thing Lily’s so gorgeous and redheaded, isn’t it? Guess that’s what sets Harry apart-his mother was quite a catch!

*Geez, Harry, so Snape gave himself a lame nickname. Big deal. I don’t think Snape actually ran around Hogwarts still calling himself that.

*Eileen Prince gave birth to a murderer! Yup, the second Snape was born; she looked down and said “Damn, I gave birth to a killer”.

*Yeah, Harry, you so should have shown Dumbledore the book. Because it’s not like DD ever brushed him off before.

*I love how Harry says DD showed him proof that Voldemort was evil in school. Good lesson, Dumbledore. Choices only work for certain people. Served Riddle right for having an ugly momma.

*I found the image of Crabbe and Goyle looking lonely without Malfoy rather cute. I like to think they’re actually friends (what, you mean friendships outside the purity of the Trio and MWPP exist?) and that Crabbe and Goyle are not looking lost because Draco isn’t there to think for them or whatever people like to think.

*Where does Draco’s infatuation with the Dark Arts come from? Wow, childish hexes-yep, that’s an unhealthy fixation right there.

*Filch and Pince are standing next to each other, which is apparently an anvil. Geez, does everybody in here have to get paired up? Although that couple does seem cute to me-cantankerous love!

*It’s a beautiful summer day for DD’s funeral. Damn it, weather, stop mocking Harry!

*Tonks’s hair is pink again, I see. I know it’s also plausible that DD would have wanted it, but I felt like it was put in there for the reader to see that R/T was confirmed. Her powers are back into full swing now that she’s got her man! It’s a miracle!

*Harry feels a great rush of affection for Neville and Luna. Note that this doesn’t motivate him to treat them like they’re his equals or anything. And they were checking their coins constantly-man, the nerds really can’t be given some dignity, can they? Now, I like Neville and Luna, but their portrayal as sad saps begging for scraps from the Harry and Co. is definitely off-putting.

*As if this funeral wasn’t cheesy enough, we get all the creatures of the forest to pay homage. They had to check their schedules, though, just to make sure they didn’t have an appointment for Ginny-admiring.

*Tears are falling fast in Hermione and Ginny’s laps-of course. Tough, manly men don’t cry, that’s girly! Only when Hermione and Ginny do it, they’re being compassionate, but Cho Chang is an evil bitch for crying over her dead boyfriend.

*Harry doesn’t find any of the words in the eulogy to mean very much about the Dumbledore he knew. Yeah, Harry, me neither-where was “manipulative elitist with a serious case of hubris”?

*I laughed at Harry thinking in regards to DD “there was so much he should have said”-they could have had years!

*Ginny is no longer crying (unlike the pansy Cho!) and has a hard, blazing look on her face-omg what a badass! And of course she wouldn’t say “don’t do it”-only cowards worry about the welfare of other people when they’re about to embark on something dangerous! Good for Harry he picked a dittohead instead of someone who might actually have a personality beyond snagging the TBWL.

*Ginny speaks “fiercely”! Do you like her yet, guys? She's spunky with a heart of gold! Look at the feminist line “I never gave up on you”-either Ginny’s really sad or Harry’s just that irrisetable. I’m voting with the former. And what’s with Hermione playing matchmaker? Ugh-it’s just like with Molly goading Lupin to go with Tonks. Just butt out already.

*Oh, and breaking up at a funeral, Harry? Not cool-remember to go for the nice guy, ladies!

*It warms the cockles of my soul to see that even with Dumbledore dead, Ron can still find the time to wish he could beat up Percy. Looks like the only love DD would want more in the world only applies to love-struck Aurors and their asexual werewolf crushes.

*I know I’m supposed to find Harry’s desire to undertake the journey alone ever-so-noble, but it just seems really stupid. Bravery or no, Harry just got owned by Snape two chapters back-doubtless we’ll see another duel in book seven, in which Harry will pwn both Snape and Draco because he’s not allowed to look bad.

*There’s still one day left to enjoy with Ron, Hermione…and not Ginny. And so on an incredibly clichéd note (dark and twisting path ahead-WOE), HBP is over. Well, aside from certain cring-worthy chapters (Felix Felices-die!) and characters being annoying all over place, I'd have to say this book could have been a lot worse. And kudos to everyone for writing up some great recaps and inspiring new people such as myself. *fangirls*

Comments

[heron-advocate.livejournal.com]

Oh, this commentary amused me ever so much. :3

Now, I like Neville and Luna, but their portrayal as sad saps begging for scraps from the Harry and Co. is definitely off-putting.

They're my two favorite characters, and I understand exactly what you mean. I liked the sextet in OotP a lot - I didn't feel like there was much of that "LOL look at the poor losers!" vibe. But, in HBP? -_- I hate that book for what it does to my favorite characters.

I stand by my belief that the bad guys have ugly mommas so that the good guys will be better equipped when it comes down to the real battle. Which, of course, includes several rounds of "Yo momma's so..."

[elanor-x.livejournal.com]

*Harry doesn’t find any of the words in the eulogy to mean very much about the Dumbledore he knew. Yeah, Harry, me neither-where was “manipulative elitist with a serious case of hubris”?
LOL. My favorite for this chapter's recap.

*I found the image of Crabbe and Goyle looking lonely without Malfoy rather cute.
Me too, but JKR helpfully explains that they were looking lonely without Malfoy "bossing them around". I honestly think that she wants us to understand that they’re actually friends and this "bossing them around" comment is due to Harry's filter.

*doubtless we’ll see another duel in book seven, in which Harry will pwn both Snape and Draco because he’s not allowed to look bad.
JKR will be able to write it only if the whole OoTF backs up Harry, since only Ron & Hermione clearly won't be enough.(Btw,I still hope this duel won't happen at all.)We will be at least partly compensated by the Trio bullying Dudley, according to JKR herself.

[static-pixie.livejournal.com]

*Harry, Ron, Hermione and Ginny are spending all their time together. Neville and Luna, despite pathetically watching their coins all year so they could risk their lives for TBWL, are out of sight, out of mind. Somehow knocking out a mountain troll means the Trio are destined to be friends for life, while risking your life for Harry twice means you get a pity date to a lame Christmas party.
SNAP. I'd never thought about this but you're totally right. Then again, I get the feeling neither Neville or Luna would have got what all the mourning was about (along with the rest of the school), since I don't think Dumbledore's ever bothered to speak two words to them. Even Neville, who's plenty nice, but just didn't make the cut to be TBWL...

*I love how Harry has to “hastily” add that Fleur is ugly (yeah, right, who’s going to believe that?) because ZOMG Ginny raised her *eyebrows*! The boy who will defeat the Dark Lord, ladies and gentlemen!
How much do I LOATHE Ginny here? How much? My God, the girl's a brat of the biggest variety. Or just Ginny-lovers. Of course, Ginny can do no wrong so, if you ask them, her being mean to Fleur is not at ALL about looks or jealousy but about the fact that Fleur's just evil, even though she never actually acts so.

*I found the image of Crabbe and Goyle looking lonely without Malfoy rather cute. I like to think they’re actually friends (what, you mean friendships outside the purity of the Trio and MWPP exist?) and that Crabbe and Goyle are not looking lost because Draco isn’t there to think for them or whatever people like to think.
What, what? Slytherins have friendships like normal people? I don't think I comprehend...

*Tears are falling fast in Hermione and Ginny’s laps-of course. Tough, manly men don’t cry, that’s girly! Only when Hermione and Ginny do it, they’re being compassionate, but Cho Chang is an evil bitch for crying over her dead boyfriend.
Well, Cho Chang is not part of a Trio OTP and has an icky girlfriend who comes before All Important Harry. And feelngs for someone Harry really didn't know all that well. Bitch should be Aveda'd. I wouldn't be surprised if most of the kids still in school wondered why the Trio + Ginny was doing so much moping and carrying on these past few weeks...

*Oh, and breaking up at a funeral, Harry? Not cool-remember to go for the nice guy, ladies!
If your boyfriend doesn't do things like break up with you at a funeral, he clearly falls short of Ideal.

*There’s still one day left to enjoy with Ron, Hermione…and not Ginny. And so on an incredibly clichéd note (dark and twisting path ahead-WOE), HBP is over. Well, aside from certain cring-worthy chapters (Felix Felices-die!) and characters being annoying all over place, I'd have to say this book could have been a lot worse. And kudos to everyone for writing up some great recaps and inspiring new people such as myself. *fangirls*
I find it interesting that when Harry kissed Ginny, it was 'like' several sunlit days, meaning they weren't real, they couldn't be. But then, finally, he does have one real sunlit day, and it's with Ron and Hermione, NOT Ginny. :)

[artystone.livejournal.com]

I find it interesting that when Harry kissed Ginny, it was 'like' several sunlit days, meaning they weren't real, they couldn't be. But then, finally, he does have one real sunlit day, and it's with Ron and Hermione, NOT Ginny. :)

AND he bitches about the sunlit part.

[q-spade.livejournal.com]

I’m assuming Lavender is still there because her parents are probably Muggles-they don’t need to know anything. Bless their little Muggle socks.

I wonder if her parents have been mentioned in any of the previous books. (I'm at work and so can't do the research myself.)

Your assumption that Lavender is Muggleborn would indicate a pattern of attraction on Ron's part. On one hand his sexual/romantic interest in Muggleborn females would open his characterization up to make him an instrument of change in his own right (rather than just hitching his wagon to Harry's star), but on the other it reminds me of Caucasians who exclusively date nonwhite people because it makes them look open-minded and cool, not because they actually care about their dates as people. A sort of fetishizing the oppressed, if you like.

I won't hold my breath for The Lowdown on Lavender in Book 7! Nevertheless, an interesting theory on your part. :)

[(Anonymous)]

it reminds me of Caucasians who exclusively date nonwhite people because it makes them look open-minded and cool, not because they actually care about their dates as people.

Ginny and Dean, anyone?

[q-spade.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure if that's such a close parallel; skin color isn't a big deal in the Wizarding World. One's bloodline is given far more importance.

[(Anonymous)]

Sorry for the misunderstanding! :D Yes, Dean is black, but he and everyone else at the school thinks he's a Muggleborn even though he's really a half-blood. So I meant blood purity too.

[q-spade.livejournal.com]

...but he and everyone else at the school thinks he's a Muggleborn even though he's really a half-blood. So I meant blood purity too.

Very true, and looking at it that way makes Ginny and Dean a great example of what I was talking about. Dating a non-pureblood made Ginny look good in Harry's eyes and clarified what "side" she was taking. But did she really care about Dean?

In the end, she didn't.

[sunnyskywalker]

I don't remember anything about her parents, but I think she was one of the people who didn't react to Trelawney's "oh noes the Grim!" in PoA, so I figured she was Muggleborn.

[q-spade.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I doubt Lavender will be important in book seven. I just had to give her some minor character love.

Nothing wrong with that! *struggles to resist making a "little more love in the world" joke, fails miserably*

Look at the response so far – aren't you glad you posted? :D

[lachlanm.livejournal.com]

Actually, JKR's handwritten classlist said Lavender is a pureblood. Probably JKR just changed her mind and decided Lavender would be muggleborn---after all, some other stuff on that list seems to have been changed prior to publication. But I was always sort of hoping that Lavender is a pureblood, and that she's just too ditzy to know what a grim is. As Red Hen says,

"I suspect there is probably a fine, long-established tradition of heedless Gryffindor airheads that Lavender at least fits right into. Why else would the Slyths (and perhaps a few others) be so disparaging toward the Gryffs in general? There are certain kinds of foolhardiness and something that usually ends up counting as a 'form' of bravery that just seem to go hand in hand."

[artystone.livejournal.com]

*Zacharias Smith’s father looks haughty, which I guess is supposed to make us think “like father, like son”. Remember kids, blood doesn’t mean anything! It’s all about our choices!

*Wow, can you believe Mrs. Finnigan? First, she worries about Seamus in OotP, now she’s trying to take him home after a Hogwarts death? What kind of pinko commie world does she think this is?

Well you know, after 6 whole books we'd think you'd have realized that the only GOOD parents evar! were James and Lily, who are, in fact, dead. Molly and Arthur don't count because they're "adorably eccentric".

*LOL, even the beautiful weather is mocking Harry, reminding him of all the good times he’d be having if Dumbledore were still alive. It probably all comes back to Snape again-damn you, Snape, for depriving Harry of even more sunlit days!

Of course. Snape gets up every morning and mutters a sunshine hex, just for Harry.

*Geez, Harry, so Snape gave himself a lame nickname. Big deal. I don’t think Snape actually ran around Hogwarts still calling himself that.

Oh, you mean they're not all running around calling themselves by nicknames? Like Princess Know-it-All, Sidekick Ron and The Chosen One?

*Eileen Prince gave birth to a murderer! Yup, the second Snape was born; she looked down and said “Damn, I gave birth to a killer”.

Of course she didn't! She just tented her fingers and sneered, "Exxxcelllennt." She was the pure-blood, after all!


*As if this funeral wasn’t cheesy enough, we get all the creatures of the forest to pay homage. They had to check their schedules, though, just to make sure they didn’t have an appointment for Ginny-admiring.

Nuh-uh! They were just using the funeral as an excuse for additional Ginny-admiring time.

[sistermagpie.livejournal.com]

Somehow knocking out a mountain troll means the Trio are destined to be friends for life, while risking your life for Harry twice means you get a pity date to a lame Christmas party.

Funny how that works, isn't it? Especially since any time Hermione's along with Harry you can't help but wonder again why they're friends besides their being assigned to each other. I mean, it's not that they don't seem to like each other, it's just what boy like Harry wants to hang around with that girl?

*I found the image of Crabbe and Goyle looking lonely without Malfoy rather cute. I like to think they’re actually friends (what, you mean friendships outside the purity of the Trio and MWPP exist?) and that Crabbe and Goyle are not looking lost because Draco isn’t there to think for them or whatever people like to think.

I like to take their muttering to each other a sign that they are thinking very hard about going after Draco, with Crabbe getting ideas from his comics!

*Where does Draco’s infatuation with the Dark Arts come from? Wow, childish hexes-yep, that’s an unhealthy fixation right there.

Harry's like those people who think being a goth or listening to Marilyn Manson eans you're Satanic.

*I know I’m supposed to find Harry’s desire to undertake the journey alone ever-so-noble, but it just seems really stupid. Bravery or no, Harry just got owned by Snape two chapters back-doubtless we’ll see another duel in book seven, in which Harry will pwn both Snape and Draco because he’s not allowed to look bad.

I know--you're going alone? Where exactly do you think you're going? Did you forget Hermione carries your brain for you?

[artystone.livejournal.com]

I know--you're going alone? Where exactly do you think you're going? Did you forget Hermione carries your brain for you?

ROFLMAO


SPOILER ALERT!
Don't worry, she and Sideshow Ron will tag along somehow.

Slytherin+ Vertigo = STILL Love.

[q-spade.livejournal.com]

I like to take their muttering to each other a sign that they are thinking very hard about going after Draco, with Crabbe getting ideas from his comics!

Considering our previous guess (http://community.livejournal.com/deathtocapslock/4716.html#cutid1) that Crabbe might have been reading Vertigo Comics (http://www.dccomics.com/vertigo/)...

...I'd much rather read about Grab & Coil kicking it Hellblazer-style & trying to find Draco the Drama Queene than about Harry and his fucking Horcruxes.

Re: Slytherin+ Vertigo = STILL Love.

[(Anonymous)]

...I'd much rather read about Grab & Coil kicking it Hellblazer-style & trying to find Draco the Drama Queene than about Harry and his fucking Horcruxes.

That would be FTW - but in JKR's hands she'd have Ginny-Sue as wonderwoman or something.

Re: Slytherin+ Vertigo = STILL Love.

[flyingskull.livejournal.com]

Nah, methinks Crabbe is a Sandman fan and he's muttering to Goyle that they need to sleep soon so they can dream about Draco-as-Destruction whereabouts. Maybe take a little trip to Greece...

[teratologist.livejournal.com]

You know, marijuana is the greatest source of comfort for plenty of people-doesn’t mean it’s good.

OTOH, I'm guessing that Ginny doesn't prevent Alzheimer's (http://www.cnn.com/2006/HEALTH/10/05/pot.alzheimers.reut/index.html).

[teratologist.livejournal.com]

See, I was thinking that Ginny would stop Harry getting Alzheimer's by causing him to drink himself to an early grave. But Harry's probably perfectly capable of drinking himself to an early grave all by himself - like godfather, like godson.

[(Anonymous)]

I’ll vomit if Neville and Luna need to be “spunkified” to fight in book seven.

I fear for Neville. At the DoM he had a pretty bad case of Gryffindoritis. Get Hermione to safety and raise the alarm like a wuss, when he could be heroically dragging her unconscious body into battle? No way!

Ginny’s just going to have to accept that Bill is marrying Fleur. Wow, that’s big of her. She’s so compassionate!

Ahaha. I'm sure the young couple have been waiting for her consent with bated breath, because the world revolves around Ginny. And her bf, of course.

-L

[(Anonymous)]

Neville doesn't lack confidence, all he needed was the desire for proper vengeance

Yes. This bugs me so very much. Neville seems like the kind of kid who, if left alone, would be aware that killing a crazy woman for revenge isn't going to solve his self-esteem issues in a blaze of manly righteousness. Somebody will have to take down Bellatrix, obviously, but I'd rather it wasn't set up to be Neville's Big Rite of Passage. There are John Wayne movies with more advanced morality than that.

I can't wait to see her reaction to Gabrielle (especially if Gabs ends up being starstruck with Harry)-omg there's a little girl cuter than Ginny???

*hopes* With any luck Fleur's mother will show up too. I'd love to see Harry having to deal with the fallout from Ginny being outshone by a whole spectrum of part-Veelas.

-L