PS Chapter Twelve
Dec. 29th, 2006 11:32 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
sistermagpie.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
deathtocapslock*The Weasley twins charm snowballs to bounce of the back of Quirrel's turban. I know this guy's going to turn out to be the bad guy, but how cruel is that? It's like Robert Duvall going after Michael O'Keefe in The Great Santini.
*Castles really aren't so comfortable are they? Still, better than those tacky Muggles with their central heating, which they've come up with in a pitiful attempt to simulate roaring hearth fires you can light with your wand.
*Malfoy has become even more unpleasant than usual, to bring you up to speed on the unpleasantness.
* Harry just had the kind of triumph that most kids never experience. But rather than enjoy that pleasure (like Ron endlessly going over his Quidditch game) it's dramatized through Malfoy's spite and jealousy. It just suddenly made me think of the kiss being more about the sight of Dean and Romilda (as opposed to the happiness of the kiss). And I don't mean that as a plea for Draco sympathy. It really does make me understand the reason Snape's at the center of everything, unable to really feel joy and always running on hate. Snape and Harry are better at anger; Malfoy's more sad.
*Ron isn't wanted at home this Christmas either, since the Weasley parents have decided to take a trip to Romania. Ginny will I guess clean the house while they're gone.
*Snape sees Ron attacking another student. Hagrid naturally thinks that "He was provoked" is going to make a difference. Because fighting in the hallways in school is never against the rules if the person has actually made you want to hit them.
*But anyway, thanks Hagrid. We can always count on you to act like another child in any situation. (Just balancing things out, I guess, since Snape's the other teacher involved.)
*Harry hates Malfoy and Snape both. Just so we're clear. Grrrr!
*Apparently, Wizards have also not yet invented a magical equivalent to a card catalog. If you want to look something up you have to just look at every book. Guess that explains the gillyweed in GoF.
*You need a special note to go to the Restricted Section and Harry knows he'll never get one of those. Because nobody would ever give him any special privileges. He'll just have to make do with anonymous gifts like super brooms and Invisibility cloaks, like your average joe.
*Naturally, once Ron and Harry have plenty of time to devote to their search for Flamel, they lose interest until Hermione returns. Got to stick to the schedule.
*Btw, I hope the Grangers enjoy their vacation with Hermione. They won't be getting many more of them.
*Ron and Harry plot ways to get Malfoy expelled just to pass the time. They might have fantasized about outdoing Malfoy over and over but Harry did that and it wasn't satisfying.
*Ron teaches Harry Wizard Chess, which is better than Muggle chess because the pieces are alive, so it's a lot more like having slaves you can murder many times over.
*Pay attention to this chess thing, btw. It's the closest thing Ron will ever get to a skill and he's only got one more book for it to translate into anything useful.
*The Dursleys send Harry 50p and I don't know why I find their presents hilarious. It's like a gift to the reader rather than Harry, who's already become so blasé about money he lets Ron have it.
*Btw, Ron's fascinated by the 50p, though he lives up the road from Muggles.
*Ron's told Molly Harry didn't expect any presents, and ever since then she's been plotting how she can claim him for the Weasley family. At this very moment she's instructing Ginny about how if she doesn't bag Harry by the end of his fourth year Molly will have to take her to a reverse exorcist and have her possessed by a demon from hell who's irresistable to men. RIP Ginny's soul.
*Dumbledore gives Harry an invisibility cloak. Because every 11-year-old needs the ability to go anywhere and do anything without anyone knowing.
*The twins can see Molly made more of an effort on Harry's jumper because
*The Weasleys must be pretty intimidating if they're not all laughed at for those jumpers. Does no one suggest their mother's squirted out such a huge litter they have to be labeled so she can remember their names? Seems like the type of thing certain people would say.
*They're wrong about the effort Molly makes, of course. Just look at all the passive-aggression she put into Ron's gift with the color. That takes effort too.
*George make one of the Twins' worst jokes ever by calling themselves Gred and Feorge. For some reason people who actually like the characters run with it and call them Gred and Feorge.
*Wizard crackers are also much better than those feeble Muggle ones. If there's one thing everyone wants on their table at Christmas its blue smoke and live rodents in the food.
*Hagrid's getting drunk. Must be a special occasion.
*Harry has a nasty feeling that mean Mrs Norris might eat the white mice. Which can't be much more unpleasant for them than being trapped in a Christmas cracker, I'd think.
*And yet when all the superior Wizard stuff is opened, they've all got to go to the Common Room and play chess. Poor Dudley's at home with his video games. Pwned!
*Harry figures out that the note on the Invisibility Cloak, "Use it well" is Gryffindor code for "Just think of the trouble you can get into and cause with this!"
*Like any good nerd, Harry sneaks out with his Invisibility Cloak and goes straight for Restricted Section to look at porn.
*It is really cute watching ickle Harry run around worried about Snape. It's funny to imagine him replaced by increasingly surly Harry who never thinks he could be doing anything actually wrong.
*Harry sees Lily crying in the mirror. Oh my god, I'm having flashbacks to that theory about James raping Lily and keeping her prisoner-this is a clue in it. She's crying over being a sex slave.
*Speaking of clues, Harry says Ron sounds like Hermione. Watch out for that falling anvil!
*Harry sees his family in the Mirror of Erised. But nobody resembling the Dursleys. It's always been his greatest desire to see his non-fat, non-ugly family.
*I kind of like Harry the Erised Junkie. Ironically staying stuck on the mirror might have kept the stone from being stolen.
*First the Restricted Section and then the Mirror of Erised. This whole book is one missed opportunity for porn after another!
*So, Dumbledore. Not creepy at all to reveal how you've been following invisible!Harry around at night since you gave him the cloak.
*Nice hint there about the next time Harry sees the mirror. If there is a next time. Which Dumbledore is totally hoping there is. If Harry doesn't start facing Voldemort soon he might never come back to life so The Chosen One can kill him like Dumbledore plans!
*You don't need a cloak to be invisible, apparently. I think somebody's got some delusions of Aragorn here.
*Whenever I think of Dumbledore invisible I think of that H/D fic that wasn't finished…was it Artful Façade? Where Draco and Harry kill spying!Dumbledore accidentally? ::sigh:: Good times.
Designated Hero
Our heroes diligently begin working on breaking through all the security to the stone so that the villain can get at it later. Our heroes, ladies and gentleman.
Idiot World
Of course, the very fact that the 11-year-olds can break through the security to the stone is an issue.
Foley Work
Work that Foley in the dark library!
Informed Attributes
Is it me, or does Dumbledore seem to have far more sinister designs on Harry in this book than Snape does?
Final score: 4
Signs of things to come: Harry gets a present that helps him break the rules. Malfoy's jealous of Harry's great success, and needs to be punished. The investigation grinds to a halt not for any actual reason, but to make it fit the school timeline. Dumbledore both encourages Harry to do something dangerous and, twinkling, acts like he's keeping him safe.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2006-12-29 05:16 pm (UTC)But I wouldn't worry about her being left alone. She'll always have the Muggle neighbours popping in twice a day to check she's all right. Oh, wait...
Apparently, Wizards have also not yet invented a magical equivalent to a card catalog. If you want to look something up you have to just look at every book. Guess that explains the gillyweed in GoF.
The Dewey Decimal system, being a Muggle invention, is altogether too whimsical to be used in Hogwarts.
Ron's told Molly Harry didn't expect any presents, and ever since then she's been plotting how she can claim him for the Weasley family. At this very moment she's instructing Ginny about how if she doesn't bag Harry by the end of his fourth year Molly will have to take her to a reverse exorcist and have her possessed by a demon from hell who's irresistable to men. RIP Ginny's soul.
Why do I always get the image of pre-first year Ginny being kept in a cage?
The Weasleys must be pretty intimidating if they're not all laughed at for those jumpers.
Laughed at? If I'd gone to school in a jumper like that I'd have been given a punch or two. Three if I'd been ginger.
Hagrid's getting drunk.
O RLY.
Harry sees his family in the Mirror of Erised. But nobody resembling the Dursleys. It's always been his
greatest desire to see his non-fat, non-ugly family.
What about his Evans grandparents? I haven't read PS for a while. Shame on you Harry.
Whenever I think of Dumbledore invisible I think of that H/D fic that wasn't finished…was it Artful Façade? Where Draco and Harry kill spying!Dumbledore accidentally? ::sigh:: Good times.
Yet another case of Fanfic>Canon then.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-29 05:20 pm (UTC)You know, if either Ron or Harry had a plan to get Lucius arrested, thus drive Draco headlong into the arms of evil, and get himself expelled forthwith, one of them probably owes the other a lot of money. Interest's been accumulating all these years. I say collect, Ron!
Dumbledore totally has more sinister designs on Harry than Snape does. Snape just hates the kid and wants to save his life. Dumbledore almost loves Harry for all his lovely, lovely potential as a weapon for mass destruction. Hee hee! Running a school is like playing chess, in a way! And of course is therefore like murdering slaves. (Ron is Dumbledore!)
Lily's crying because she's too popular for her own good, and she wishes a strong man would take her in hand, preferably with the Imperius. Trust me, I'm a woman: I know what we're like.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-30 05:45 am (UTC)*bows to superior wisdom*
(I wonder if it's bad that the "I know what we're like" joke is never, ever going to get old for me.)
no subject
Date: 2006-12-30 09:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-12-31 11:22 pm (UTC)*still laughs at that one too*
no subject
Date: 2006-12-30 04:29 pm (UTC)Of course, we women always wish to have some man fight and dominate over us. *eyeroll*
And the HP series is feminist how? It always makes me burn when people write about how equal it is. I'm sorry, a female character engaging in bullying behavior is not feminist.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-29 05:32 pm (UTC)Haha - I love it! Who knows what darkness lurks in the hearts of portly family-values-fanatic house wives? =]
Does no one suggest their mother's squirted out such a huge litter they have to be labeled so she can remember their names? Seems like the type of thing certain people would say.
I wouldn't say it. But you'd better believe I'd think it. Oh yes. Oh yes. :D
*Harry sees his family in the Mirror of Erised. But nobody resembling the Dursleys. It's always been his greatest desire to see his non-fat, non-ugly family.
It always puzzles me that Harry considers himself an orphan. He's really not, he's got parents, it's just that they're bad, abusive parents. A bad situation all on its own, but the way Harry and the Dursleys completely denies any relation to each other strikes me as somewhat stupid and simplistic. I'm dubious whether you can live in the same house with anyone for ten years and have such a simple relationship with them.
Not that Rowling exactly invented the idea of "evil foster family, good real family," I admit... =]
no subject
Date: 2006-12-29 06:19 pm (UTC)Best theory ever!
more later
Date: 2006-12-29 09:01 pm (UTC)Especially since his family was getting insulted, which is obviously unforgiveable to Hagrid. How on earth could his simple, unprejudiced mind understand insulting an entire group of people related to each other? If Ron had insulted the Malfoys, he would have stood by as Malfoy socked Ron, watching justice be served.
But anyway, thanks Hagrid. We can always count on you to act like another child in any situation.
I love that he’s hiding behind a tree, idly observing. Don’t feel you need to intervene or anything, there, Hagrid. I suppose it’s just lucky he didn’t decide to join in.
I’m already feeling enough sympathy for the poor owls being forcibly nursed back to health by him. I imagine it to be much like ‘Misery’.
Castles really aren't so comfortable are they? Still, better than those tacky Muggles with their central heating, which they've come up with in a pitiful attempt to simulate roaring hearth fires you can light with your wand.
Love that the Gryffindor common room and the Great Hall (the most important places, since they house the cream of the school!) have roaring fires – and the other common rooms, too, right guys? Oh no, wait, the dungeons where the Slytherins sleep are freezing. Ah well, that’s all they deserve.
The Weasley twins charm snowballs to bounce of the back of Quirrel's turban. I know this guy's going to turn out to be the bad guy, but how cruel is that?
Speaking of batshit theories, this totally reminds me of that one defense of them which was basically that they only ever attack evil people (even taking the harshest, most Old Testament definition of ‘evil’ to Draco, Dudley, Montague and Malcolm Baddock the anonymous Slytherin first year; I’m not sure how this explains them picking Neville – or that matter, the uber-awesome Ginny – to prank, except going by the ‘They’re fun-loving and mean no harm, except when they do, to characters I don’t like, and I find it funny. Then it’s okay.’ defense.), innately sensing their inferiority, and reacting to it.
Nothing to do with targetting the weak – they could always throw snowballs at Snape, of course (or even McGonagall, who’s house inexplicably seems to see her as harsh and difficult to get around), who’s probably been far tougher on them personally than Quirrell, but Snape might actually be nastier than them. Better pick the shaking stammering frightened guy.
Just balancing things out, I guess, since Snape's the other teacher involved.
It's cute that Snape went capslock reprimanding Ron. I take my Snape/Draco moments where I can get them.
Harry has a nasty feeling that mean Mrs Norris might eat the white mice.
Or you know, Hedwig.
Re: more later
Date: 2006-12-29 10:40 pm (UTC)I have the most adorable image of Draco, Crabbe and Goyle trying desperately to roast a single marshmellow on a candle flame. Or rather, Draco making the other two do it for him. X3
Re: more later
Date: 2006-12-30 02:46 am (UTC)If it were true, though, it could mean more evidence for Evil!Ginny. Not that that's enough to make me believe it.
Re: more later
Date: 2006-12-30 02:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-12-30 11:43 am (UTC)Especially since his family was getting insulted, which is obviously unforgiveable to Hagrid.
Oh, come on! He's a Gryffindor. It's the Gryffindor Code!
Rule 117 of the Gryffindor Code clearly states that "I was provoked" is a good enough defense for any action. (See: OOtP Quidditch match and the Sectumsempra "had something good up his sleeve" incident)
no subject
Date: 2006-12-30 02:32 am (UTC)Not to mention heated flooring. Why would anyone want to luxuriate in houses with heated floors when there are roaring wizard fires? Stupid muggles.
Harry just had the kind of triumph that most kids never experience. But rather than enjoy that pleasure (like Ron endlessly going over his Quidditch game) it's dramatized through Malfoy's spite and jealousy. It just suddenly made me think of the kiss being more about the sight of Dean and Romilda (as opposed to the happiness of the kiss). And I don't mean that as a plea for Draco sympathy. It really does make me understand the reason Snape's at the center of everything, unable to really feel joy and always running on hate. Snape and Harry are better at anger; Malfoy's more sad.
Yes. You just hit on the reason why I think the kiss is so creepy. Instead of discovering Ginny as a friend, confidant and new love, Harry instead exults in making everyone jealous. Its plain narrow and creepy when it isn't supposed to be. Ick.
Apparently, Wizards have also not yet invented a magical equivalent to a card catalog. If you want to look something up you have to just look at every book. Guess that explains the gillyweed in GoF.
Wizards = creative
Muggles with left brain capacity, using the Dewey decimal system = stupid
Pay attention to this chess thing, btw. It's the closest thing Ron will ever get to a skill and he's only got one more book for it to translate into anything useful.
I'm still disappointed about this lost Ron talent. Sigh.
The Weasleys must be pretty intimidating if they're not all laughed at for those jumpers. Does no one suggest their mother's squirted out such a huge litter they have to be labeled so she can remember their names? Seems like the type of thing certain people would say.
When I was very young, I lived near a very large family. A lot was said about them by all and sundry. None of it was nice. Its rather strange that this series would invite much of the same derision over its lead characters. But its part of the stock characteristics all authors follow - See "A Wrinkle in Time".
Harry sees his family in the Mirror of Erised. But nobody resembling the Dursleys. It's always been his greatest desire to see his non-fat, non-ugly family.
He is just brimming with love, that Harry.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-30 02:40 am (UTC)Only a month and a half of friendship, and already she's got them trained to need her in order to accomplish anything.
*George make one of the Twins' worst jokes ever by calling themselves Gred and Feorge. For some reason people who actually like the characters run with it and call them Gred and Feorge.
I never actually minded this joke too much. Maybe because it's one of the few times their humour doesn't involve harming other people.
*Harry has a nasty feeling that mean Mrs Norris might eat the white mice. Which can't be much more unpleasant for them than being trapped in a Christmas cracker, I'd think.
Because only evil cats eat cute little white mice, you know. Good cats make sure they only eat ugly things like rats.
*Harry sees Lily crying in the mirror. Oh my god, I'm having flashbacks to that theory about James raping Lily and keeping her prisoner-this is a clue in it. She's crying over being a sex slave.
Right off the bat, the problem with that is that since Harry is seeing it in the Mirror of Erised, that would mean his heart's desire is for his mother to be his father's sex slave, and Harry may have issues, but that's a little extreme.
*First the Restricted Section and then the Mirror of Erised. This whole book is one missed opportunity for porn after another!
All six books are, really. I'm remembering comments someone made about the chair of bondage in OotP.
Dumbledore both encourages Harry to do something dangerous and, twinkling, acts like he's keeping him safe.
This makes me think another series of books where the villain plans to get his young cousin killed by saying just enough to interest him in the dangerous, evil city and dropping just enough hints of being too scared to go there himself to make it irresistable for the boy to go check it out himself. And he does it all under the guise of being a lovig, exciting relative. Obviously Dumbledore isn't trying to get Harry killed here, but the way he manipulates him is creepy in the same way.
no subject
Date: 2007-08-10 12:30 am (UTC)I'm responding ridiculously late here, but if you happen to get this, what series was it?
no subject
Date: 2007-08-10 01:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-08-10 01:38 am (UTC)Talking of lions, recall Disney's the Lion King?
Date: 2010-04-03 04:00 pm (UTC)How should the film producers have conveyed Dumbledore's duplicity in a way that Harry would not have noticed, but the viewers would? What body language could be used?
no subject
Date: 2009-02-07 03:39 am (UTC)No, his heart's desire is for dozens of people to feel lots of sympathy for the PAIN IN HIS HEART.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-31 09:32 pm (UTC)He obviously cared more about the reaction of anybody else in the room than Ginny's. Which is made worse by the fact that we're told that Harry didn't care how many people were around before he kissed her, but he sure as hell cared afterward.
*Ron's told Molly Harry didn't expect any presents, and ever since then she's been plotting how she can claim him for the Weasley family. At this very moment she's instructing Ginny about how if she doesn't bag Harry by the end of his fourth year Molly will have to take her to a reverse exorcist and have her possessed by a demon from hell who's irresistable to men. RIP Ginny's soul.
It certainly explains why Ginny had dress robes in GoF, when she wouldn't even have been able to go if nobody asked her out. Bet you that they were new too.
*Dumbledore gives Harry an invisibility cloak. Because every 11-year-old needs the ability to go anywhere and do anything without anyone knowing.
Thankfully Harry never acts like a real teenager would and use the cloak to spy on the
girlsboys of Hogwarts while changing. Or maybe he did and that's why he had to make those sudden trips to the bathroom in HBP while following Draco. Who knows how far he followed him.*They're wrong about the effort Molly makes, of course. Just look at all the passive-aggression she put into Ron's gift with the color. That takes effort too.
It's probably routine by now, after all they get the same shitty jumper every year for Christmas. I mean, if she's making the same present every year for them, she could at least put some effort and thought into it.
Hmm, are we ever told what Ginny's jumper looks like?
*Harry has a nasty feeling that mean Mrs Norris might eat the white mice. Which can't be much more unpleasant for them than being trapped in a Christmas cracker, I'd think.
Because Mrs Norris is the only cat in this school. *eyeroll* And the owls? Live off of owl threats alone I presume.
*And yet when all the superior Wizard stuff is opened, they've all got to go to the Common Room and play chess. Poor Dudley's at home with his video games. Pwned!
And his TV and videos and all kinds of board games and comics and his computer and so on and so forth. But thank God Harry hasn't to make due with any of this, he has non-fiction school books, chess, Exploding Snap and chocolate frog cards. Which of course will be just as fun five years down the road as they are now.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-31 11:29 pm (UTC)It's probably routine by now, after all they get the same shitty jumper every year for Christmas. I mean, if she's making the same present every year for them, she could at least put some effort and thought into it.
Hmm, are we ever told what Ginny's jumper looks like?
It's sparklypoo, of course!
no subject
Date: 2007-01-01 12:04 am (UTC)Her sweater is knitted out of awesome!
no subject
Date: 2007-01-05 02:13 am (UTC)It has a large 'G' on it. Not for 'Ginny', but for 'Girl'. 'Why not advertise her role in life?', thought Molly.