GoF Chapter Three

[sistermagpie.livejournal.com]

*Sucks to be Aunt Petunia, doesn’t it? She’s got to wonder what nature had against her that Lily got the ability to do magic and the looks while Petunia got horse teeth without that magical ability to fix them and become beautiful like Hermione.

*Dudley: still fat. Fat like a killer whale. Fat so he takes up a whole side of the table. Fat so he’s wider than he is tall. We can’t stress this enough.

*I know I’m a broken record, but I must again mention here that I don’t get the whole "Draco is just Dudley, with magic." The one time we see Draco with his father his father is keeping him in line, shaming him in front of a shopkeeper and having none of his excuses about his marks. Aunt Petunia speaks to Dudley "tremulously" and explains his bad marks by saying his teacher doesn’t understand him. Vernon says it’s good he gets bad marks. Opposites.

*The Dursleys also refuse to believe Dudley’s a bully. Ironically, they do this by using words I’ve seen in fandom associated not with Draco or Dudley or Snape, but with the twins. Just boisterous boys who wouldn’t hurt a fly.

*Dudley’s school uniform includes knickerbockers. Harry is presumably kept from laughing at this by the fact that his school uniform is a dress.

*The lines about the school nurse seeing what Petunia’s sharp eyes shouldn't have missed, that far from needing extra nourishment, Dudley had grown to the size of a young killer whale, somehow remind me of certain comments about Harry regarding his temperament.

*Harry is never more likeable than when on the receiving end of the Dursleys more outrageous behavior. I can’t help but laugh over the expression he must have made at getting the smaller bit of grapefruit.

*Still as an aside, nothing wrong with the whole family going healthy, since their diet seemed to be another thing against them in the past, and it’s actually quite nice of them to make it a family thing. Something tells me they won’t get any credit for this from the narrator.

*We’re told Hermione sent sugar-free snacks because her parents are dentists, but don’t we all figure Hermione would send lame snacks anyway?

*Ha ha! Harry is not following the diet but is eating lots of cake! This will not result in him gaining weight while the Dursleys lose it (Petunia is already thin as a rail).

*Arthur has managed to get prime tickets at the QWC for a crowd of people due to his connections. Connections, which, of course, are nothing, like whatever dreadful business will manage to get the Malfoys fewer seats nearby. Tickets are extremely hard to come by, yet the Weasleys have managed to get how many? That must have been some crime Arthur covered up.

*The stamps are cute. But again you do wonder exactly what it is that Arthur studies if he works in the middle of the Muggle world and doesn’t get the stamp thing. The post office tends to have signs up and stuff.

*In his head, Harry scolds Vernon for insulting Molly’s weight by insulting Dudley’s again.

*Ironically, I doubt Vernon was much meaning to insult Molly so much as correctly identifying her from memory--the narrator calls her plump. Only the most beautiful among us sound good when accurately described for identification. Harry doesn’t like to hear people he likes described bluntly unless he’s doing it himself. (I love that Seinfeld episode where they lose each other at the movies and have to keep describing each other in less than flattering terms.)

*So, do we think Molly’s referring to the "normal" way to send mail is supposed to just be a burn on the Dursleys or a parallel to their own judgmental views?

*Boy, the Dursleys must have seriously wondered what happened to Harry fourth year. He leaves with "That was an excellent breakfast. I feel really fully, don’t you?" and comes back with, "Hold still while I take my unrelated anger out on you."

*Ron reveals that asking the Dursleys permission to take Harry to the world cup was a sham, as they were coming for Harry whether they liked it or not. Perhaps if this were not normal treatment for Muggles, it wouldn’t read as sinister to me. Yes, the Dursleys suck, but I’m not convinced the Grangers’ request wasn't just as fake. If they want Hermione to go, and she wants to go, she’s going.

* Harry refers to the Dursleys as "the Muggles." I know he’s repeating Ron, and being that he hates the Durlseys he’s got good reason to want to refer to them that way, but stil--very hard to take the hand-wringing about tolerance seriously as part of the lower life forms who can’t expect to be treated with equal respect to a wizard, but should be grateful Arthur finds us amusing and doesn’t turn us upside-down and dangle us in the air.

*Though to be fair, not dangling someone upside-down in the air sometimes seems a sign of respect reserved for the few in the WW. The most you can hope for is you won’t be hexed too badly.

*I like to think Hedwig finds all these people idiots.

*Remember how Petunia was strange for "feeling the best way to keep up Dudley’s morale was to make sure he did, at least, get more to eat than Harry"? Well, Harry is now immensely happy because he’s got cake, and Dudley only has grapefruit. The idea that knowing a person you hate is suffering is part of the definition of happiness is just natural as breathing to everybody in the story. I suspect Luna is the one person who doesn’t think that way, and that this is part of what makes her loony.

*Otoh, four birthday cakes sitting for weeks under the floorboards of your bedroom in high summer? Maybe you might want that grapefruit after all, Harry.

*Btw, is Harry going to throw that stuff out before he leaves, or is infesting the Dursley house with rats and bugs part of what’s great about the invitation?

*It’s hard, just now, for Harry to be worried about anything, even Voldemort. This time next year Harry would amaze himself with this ability. How strange it is to think that someone could be eating cake and looking forward to a Quidditch match while he, Harry, lives the life of a Marked Man.





Designated Hero
The casual revelation that the Weasleys see no reason to respect someone else’s nasty parents if they’re Muggles is a bit chilling. And the fat jokes are just relentless, particularly since Harry sort of gets to have his cake and eat it too. (ETA: Silly me--the Weasleys never respected anyone else's guardians if they were Muggle!)

Misdirected Answering
This is a very low scoring chapter, as basically all that happens is that Harry gets a letter and rsvps. Reminds me of when I first read PS/SS and thought that whole business with the letters was going to go on forever. Getting a letter at the Dursleys always seems to need an entire chapter for some reason. It’s not like Dudley's diet and Harry’s cake come up at all later. As much as I like seeing them, I’d cut them out of the GoF movie too.

Final score: 2.5

Comments

[baeraad.livejournal.com]

*Ha ha! Harry is not following the diet but is eating lots of cake!

While my sweet tooth covers most of my mouth, the idea of living mostly off cake for weeks makes me squirm. I think after a few days, I'd be desperate for something low-sugar. =]

*So, do we think Molly’s referring to the "normal" way to send mail is supposed to just be a burn on the Dursleys or a parallel to their own judgmental views?

I think I've got the Muggle thing figured out. We're supposed to see Muggles as grownups, concerned with stupid grownup things, and wizards as eternal children who dress up and do weird things just because. It's supposed to be hilerious that not only can the Muggles not make the wizards "act their age," but every time they meet, the wizards force the humourless Muggles to join in on their eternal game. And it is sort of funny - in a kiddie book. In a YA book, which is what these books are supposed to be nowadays, it's just stupid and a little disturbing.

I don't suppose anyone here is familiar with a roleplaying game called Changeling: the Dreaming? That's Harry Potter as it should be, I tell you. =] Wouldn't it be fun if wizards lived in fear of being cornered by really dull Muggles, because not only would their spells not work on them, but prolonged exposal would have the risk of turning them into Muggles too? :D

[teratologist.livejournal.com]

It's supposed to be hilerious that not only can the Muggles not make the wizards "act their age," but every time they meet, the wizards force the humorless Muggles to join in on their eternal game.

In this, the wizards would be a lot like the trickster gods of various mythologies.

Of course, in the actual mythologies, the trickster is amusing and sometimes liberating - but also frequently totally amoral and FUCKING TERRIFYING. Not at all suitable for black-and-white good-vs-evil throwdowns.

[kaskait.livejournal.com]

*Dudley: still fat. Fat like a killer whale. Fat so he takes up a whole side of the table. Fat so he’s wider than he is tall. We can’t stress this enough.

But the readers must be reminded in case any of them develop stray feelings of sympathy for baby whale Dudley.

*Arthur has managed to get prime tickets at the QWC for a crowd of people due to his connections. Connections, which, of course, are nothing, like whatever dreadful business will manage to get the Malfoys fewer seats nearby. Tickets are extremely hard to come by, yet the Weasleys have managed to get how many? That must have been some crime Arthur covered up.

When I read about all those tickets in that important box seat, I thought who got their ass kissed by Arthur. Or if Arthur and his family are still big enough players to warrent such favoritism.

[jodel-from-aol.livejournal.com]

I used to think that Arthur was some kind of distant connection to Dumbledore and everyone (but the kids) knew it. That explanation doesn't hold up any more. Pity. Would explain a lot.

[kaskait.livejournal.com]

Dumbledore's first allegiance is to the group that runs the DOM. Its probably required of all Unspeakables. So that leaves any family on the outs.

Perhaps the Black connections still count for something. The Weaselys are treated as the figureheads since Malfoy is only a pretender. Lucius had to actually work for those Quidditch Cup tickets.

Silly Rabbitt, Lucius actually thought Voldie landing him an influential wife would make him a real player.

[saylee.livejournal.com]

*Sucks to be Aunt Petunia, doesn’t it? She’s got to wonder what nature had against her that Lily got the ability to do magic and the looks while Petunia got horse teeth without that magical ability to fix them and become beautiful like Hermione.

(Petunia is already thin as a rail).

Your post made me think of yet another reason it sucks to be Petunia. I assume Dudley was fat from birth, as a sign of his innate evil (certainly he was a fat toddler), and Petunia is supposed to be a very skinny woman. Giving birth to a baby Dudley's size must have been hell.

[sweettalkeress.livejournal.com]

From what I understand, at least one fanfic's had it Dudley was a preemie. That may explain... some things....

[papier.livejournal.com]

Dudley: still fat. Fat like a killer whale. Fat so he takes up a whole side of the table. Fat so he’s wider than he is tall. We can’t stress this enough.

I'm trying to visualise what Dudley must look like from this quote, but it's hard. Could JKR in future use a few more fat metaphors and personifications please?

We’re told Hermione sent sugar-free snacks because her parents are dentists, but don’t we all figure Hermione would send lame snacks anyway?

She's the stereotype student present in every school without failure that eats carrot sticks and raisens for lunch while her friends get the cool stuff.

Btw, is Harry going to throw that stuff out before he leaves, or is infesting the Dursley house with rats and bugs part of what’s great about the invitation?

Of course he won't! Cleanliness is teh ebil! The Dursley's sparkling white kitchen is proof of how foul they are wheras the Weasley's filthy pit is a symbol of their loyalty and goodness.

[anehan]

Yes, the Dursleys suck, but I’m not convinced the Grangers’ request wasn't just as fake. If they want Hermione to go, and she wants to go, she’s going.

Explains why the Grangers keep letting Hermione back to Hogwarts, and why they don't insist she spends the holidays with them instead of with the Weasleys. They are smart people: they know they'd better keep their mouths shut if they don't want unmentionable things done to them.