That great Draco taste!
Sep. 26th, 2005 04:29 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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deathtocapslockMore chapters, more chance to bitch about everything. Yay, an' stuff.
*This was one of the chapter titles, if I remember correctly, given out prior to the release of the book as a "taster". I distinctly remember certain amongst us hoping that Draco wouldn't be forced to take a detour into the jaws of some escaped beast or something.
*I notice again that Harry eats "triple helpings" of whatever Mrs. Weasley bakes. This being the kind of universe it is, she probably makes stuff with a lot of carbohydrate in it. Naturally, Harry remains as skinny as a rail. Obviously, Dudley was unfortunate with his genetics and puts on weight if he so much as looks a a Penguin bar :(
*I still can't help thinking that the description of Remus makes it sound as though he's playing up the "woeful" angle. Aside from the pitifully torn robes, there's emphasis on his greying hair. As I've said before, hair going grey is down to genetics and not stress. Some people find their first grey hairs very young indeed. Being in your mid-late thirties and having greying hair is nothing out of the ordinary at all.
*Florean Fortescue, as well as having a great name, was also a good man and gave out free ice cream to his favourite celebrity customer. For this and possibly other reasons, he has been "dragged off". One wonders what the Death Eaters might have done to him when they just killed Karkaroff. Now, I don't mean to malign the dead, but why didn't Karkaroff leave the country? Maybe he and Slughorn could have sneaked off in a Muggle boat disguised as boxes of Jaffa Cakes. No, I am not getting surreal shipping ideas! Really! Besides, it's too late for that now :(
*I notice that Bill is "being plied with wine" by Fleur. Surely she doesn't have to get him trollied to shag her?
*Maybe Ollivander left the country. I shouldn't imagine so, he's probably gone to the Death Eaters. But he can be my one last hope for someone with some damn sense until book seven comes out. I mean to say, under those conditions, if I knew transfiguration and thought I was in any sort of danger, I'd do everything I could to get out of the way of it, possibly pretending to be a cat in the process.
*Harry is captain! This means he gets a shiny badge, use of the Prefect's bathroom and we get acres of dull Quidditch coverage. Woo.
*Ooh, it's all very tense around the Weasley household, with arguments flaring up left, right and centre. It's nice to know that in topsy-turvy times of conflicts, some things remain constant :)
*Poor Tom-the-Landlord, with his empty pub.
*A note about the seedy street merchant: he's trying to sell stuff. He'd call Ginny "pretty" if she had a face like Hagrid's bell-end. He'd probably call Hagrid's bell-end pretty if he thought it'd help him sell stuff. That's what these people do.
*Draco: he's got style. You can say what you like about his looks, but damn, he knows how to dress. "Handsome" robes indeed! I bet his mum's got style like that too. I bet she has designer stuff. But I digress.
*Rowling makes sure to assure us that Narcissa's face is "arrogant". Oh, and she looks like her sister. This is how we know they're both evil. I note that Lily apparently looks nothing like Petunia, clearly proving which one is the "good" one. I bet Andromeda looks nothing like Bellatrix or Narcissa, just so we know she's not like them.
*Narcissa knows comebacks! *fangirls*
*And after some more stuff, we come to Fred and George's shop. I maintain that if any of the "bad" characters came up with half the stuff they do, fandom would be shaking its head and tut-tutting about what beastly folk they are. Edible dark marks? U-No-Poo? Come on, if Draco came up with this stuff, there'd be three hundred comment long threads at Fandom Wank arguing over whether this was beastly or perfectly understandable. But, because it's Fred and George, it's at once comedy gold?
*It's nice to know that Fred and George's year-long experiments with self-harm have yielded positive results. Skiving Snackboxes still really creep me out. Still, any bulimics in the magical community won't have to bother with fingers down the throat. But Fred and George's teeth must be shot to shit. Maybe they had all that fixed.
*What is the point of the Daydream Charms? I mean, can't these people have daydreams on their own? Or is it more of a hallucination charm? I'm genuinely perplexed as to the point. I daresay the idea that they'll be used as tranquilisers will have to come up, since really, what the hell else are they?
*I'd be interested to see, actually, if the practise of F&G testing products on themselves has any long-term consequences. Probably not, but worth keeping half an eye open, I guess.
*You know, I'd have thought that Muggle stuff would be more interesting to magical kids than boring old regular magic. But even kids raised in magic appear astonished by it. It's a funny old world.
*Harry can teach anyone Shield Charms! He is the bestest teacher evar! For crying out loud.
*It makes sense that Fred and George would be expanding into weaponry. They were generally damaging stuff anyway.
*Love potions. Woo-hoo. I guess it helps with plot points later in the book, but it's so damn stupid. Also, not really keen on the way the products supposedly aimed at women are all love potions and pink stuff, whereas boys get to look at things that go bang and produce smoke.
*Harry likes to keep a close eye on Draco. Mmm-hmm.
*Why do Hermione and Ron have to tag along when Harry wants to stalk Draco? Harry can do it on his own later in the book. Well, apart from when he ropes Dobby and Kreacher into it.
*I quite like the way Hermione failed in her mission here. I find her much more likeable in this book. It's as if Rowling had been reading the_snarkery and worried that Hermione was getting away with too much. Although that is probably not the case. But *waves* anyway.
*This was one of the chapter titles, if I remember correctly, given out prior to the release of the book as a "taster". I distinctly remember certain amongst us hoping that Draco wouldn't be forced to take a detour into the jaws of some escaped beast or something.
*I notice again that Harry eats "triple helpings" of whatever Mrs. Weasley bakes. This being the kind of universe it is, she probably makes stuff with a lot of carbohydrate in it. Naturally, Harry remains as skinny as a rail. Obviously, Dudley was unfortunate with his genetics and puts on weight if he so much as looks a a Penguin bar :(
*I still can't help thinking that the description of Remus makes it sound as though he's playing up the "woeful" angle. Aside from the pitifully torn robes, there's emphasis on his greying hair. As I've said before, hair going grey is down to genetics and not stress. Some people find their first grey hairs very young indeed. Being in your mid-late thirties and having greying hair is nothing out of the ordinary at all.
*Florean Fortescue, as well as having a great name, was also a good man and gave out free ice cream to his favourite celebrity customer. For this and possibly other reasons, he has been "dragged off". One wonders what the Death Eaters might have done to him when they just killed Karkaroff. Now, I don't mean to malign the dead, but why didn't Karkaroff leave the country? Maybe he and Slughorn could have sneaked off in a Muggle boat disguised as boxes of Jaffa Cakes. No, I am not getting surreal shipping ideas! Really! Besides, it's too late for that now :(
*I notice that Bill is "being plied with wine" by Fleur. Surely she doesn't have to get him trollied to shag her?
*Maybe Ollivander left the country. I shouldn't imagine so, he's probably gone to the Death Eaters. But he can be my one last hope for someone with some damn sense until book seven comes out. I mean to say, under those conditions, if I knew transfiguration and thought I was in any sort of danger, I'd do everything I could to get out of the way of it, possibly pretending to be a cat in the process.
*Harry is captain! This means he gets a shiny badge, use of the Prefect's bathroom and we get acres of dull Quidditch coverage. Woo.
*Ooh, it's all very tense around the Weasley household, with arguments flaring up left, right and centre. It's nice to know that in topsy-turvy times of conflicts, some things remain constant :)
*Poor Tom-the-Landlord, with his empty pub.
*A note about the seedy street merchant: he's trying to sell stuff. He'd call Ginny "pretty" if she had a face like Hagrid's bell-end. He'd probably call Hagrid's bell-end pretty if he thought it'd help him sell stuff. That's what these people do.
*Draco: he's got style. You can say what you like about his looks, but damn, he knows how to dress. "Handsome" robes indeed! I bet his mum's got style like that too. I bet she has designer stuff. But I digress.
*Rowling makes sure to assure us that Narcissa's face is "arrogant". Oh, and she looks like her sister. This is how we know they're both evil. I note that Lily apparently looks nothing like Petunia, clearly proving which one is the "good" one. I bet Andromeda looks nothing like Bellatrix or Narcissa, just so we know she's not like them.
*Narcissa knows comebacks! *fangirls*
*And after some more stuff, we come to Fred and George's shop. I maintain that if any of the "bad" characters came up with half the stuff they do, fandom would be shaking its head and tut-tutting about what beastly folk they are. Edible dark marks? U-No-Poo? Come on, if Draco came up with this stuff, there'd be three hundred comment long threads at Fandom Wank arguing over whether this was beastly or perfectly understandable. But, because it's Fred and George, it's at once comedy gold?
*It's nice to know that Fred and George's year-long experiments with self-harm have yielded positive results. Skiving Snackboxes still really creep me out. Still, any bulimics in the magical community won't have to bother with fingers down the throat. But Fred and George's teeth must be shot to shit. Maybe they had all that fixed.
*What is the point of the Daydream Charms? I mean, can't these people have daydreams on their own? Or is it more of a hallucination charm? I'm genuinely perplexed as to the point. I daresay the idea that they'll be used as tranquilisers will have to come up, since really, what the hell else are they?
*I'd be interested to see, actually, if the practise of F&G testing products on themselves has any long-term consequences. Probably not, but worth keeping half an eye open, I guess.
*You know, I'd have thought that Muggle stuff would be more interesting to magical kids than boring old regular magic. But even kids raised in magic appear astonished by it. It's a funny old world.
*Harry can teach anyone Shield Charms! He is the bestest teacher evar! For crying out loud.
*It makes sense that Fred and George would be expanding into weaponry. They were generally damaging stuff anyway.
*Love potions. Woo-hoo. I guess it helps with plot points later in the book, but it's so damn stupid. Also, not really keen on the way the products supposedly aimed at women are all love potions and pink stuff, whereas boys get to look at things that go bang and produce smoke.
*Harry likes to keep a close eye on Draco. Mmm-hmm.
*Why do Hermione and Ron have to tag along when Harry wants to stalk Draco? Harry can do it on his own later in the book. Well, apart from when he ropes Dobby and Kreacher into it.
*I quite like the way Hermione failed in her mission here. I find her much more likeable in this book. It's as if Rowling had been reading the_snarkery and worried that Hermione was getting away with too much. Although that is probably not the case. But *waves* anyway.
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Date: 2005-09-27 02:25 pm (UTC)Yes, let's think about that for a moment, shall we? It's that weird sort-of-child-like attitude where of course girls are all silly about guys and get crushes on them but guys are too dim to notice. When really, for goodness sake, wouldn't guys be paying money for the wizarding version of--what's it called...Spanish Fly?...instead? Not to make someone fall in love with you but to make them fall in lust with you for short periods of time. Probably if the love potions wear off they'd work just as well. Yet as of yet we've never seen it used. The only time we see a guy acting at all that way it's Cormac McClaggen when Hermione invites him to the Xmas party and he's all over her under the mistletoe. He's angry when Hermione leaves, but there's no hint this could be much danger to her. Malfoy and Nott smirk at the idea of love potions being powerful.
no subject
Date: 2005-09-27 02:39 pm (UTC)So basically men wouldn't need them because the girls in the WW have lower standards, or something. Really, though, who'd get turned down? Crabbe and Goyle for comedy value can't get dates, but there's always someone even uglier/more annoying than Slytherin guys - like Slytherin girls.
no subject
Date: 2005-09-29 12:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-27 09:19 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-27 11:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-29 12:16 pm (UTC)In fact, Merpose might be less attractive than Tom Riddle, but I find it kind of silly that she would have needed a love potion to make him, well shag her. I mean is Tom Riddle Sr really such a gentleman that he needs to be deeply in love with a woman to even think about about doing that? Here's a upperclass young man who has the head of a lower class young girl in the vicinity completely turned, and it doesn't even occur to him to take advantage of her? My, he must really be the opposite of his son, mustn't he?