Deathly Hallows, chapter 11

[anehan]

The Bribe

* The Death Eaters seem to know where 12 Grimmauld Place is, even though they can't access the place. Which means that Snape must not have told Voldemort that Dumbledore was the Secret Keeper. This alone should have tipped at least Hermione off to the fact that Snape was on their side.

* Oh, come on, Hermione. It's not like Moody's curse could prevent Snape from revealing the information if he had wanted to.

* I wonder why the DEs haven't been standing outside 12 Grimmauld Place since OotP. Why now and not then?

* Hermione and Ron bickering is getting old. I don't see how their marriage can be anything but misery.

* Really, all one has to do to get past Moody's wards is say "it was not I who killed you, Albus". I've said this before, but I can't believe how pathetic this is.

* I wonder, if Snape was truly on Voldemort's side, would Voldemort have won? Because it seems to me that Snape is the only competent adult wizard there is. (Or maybe Voldemort should go to Señor Draco for advice. After all, he seems to be the only wizard whose evil plot worked.)

* Lupin looks exhausted. What, not shabby?

* Even now, when they are no longer teaching colleagues, Lupin calls Snape "Severus". Interrrrresting.

* It's impossible to track anyone who Apparates. One more reason, in addition to mmmfflmmmffflmmmph, for not to Apparate Harry out of 4 Privet Drive.

* Even Lupin doesn't know about Voldemort's name-hearing skill.

* So the Death Eaters only interrogated people who they knew were their enemies. Somehow it doesn't seem like Voldemort's style to leave his enemies alive.

* Even the Tonkses were attacked, even though they are protected by powerful enchantments that are able to stop Voldemort himself.

* Ah, so the Tonkses' house is still protected by the enchantments, but now that the DEs have taken over the Ministry, they no longer fear using illegal spells. That must make sense in some alternate universe, but certainly not in this.

* Lupin hesitates before showing the Daily Prophet to the Trio. Probably wise, considering Harry's power of CAPSLOCK.

* Harry heroically resists using his special power. I am thankful.

* I'm not surprised that the Daily Prophet article hasn't resulted in an uproar. If I were a law officer, and I had to investigate a murder where no one but the people who were present knew the murderer, I too would want to question the witnesses.

* The sudden new Ministry policy concerning the Muggle-born really should have tipped everyone with some kind of deductive power to the fact that Voldemort has taken over the Ministry. Or if not that, then at least that there's something deeply wrong with the Ministry.

* The new policy is kind of heavy handed. Yeah, yeah, we get it. The Death Eaters are powerful masters of dark and evil arts. Or Thatcherian Tories.

* Right, right, sorry. Couldn't help myself. I meant to say that the Death Eaters are like the Nazis. We get it.

* Nevertheless, I kind of like the new policy, or at least I would have liked it if it hadn't appeared out of thin air. The notion that the Muggle-born somehow steal magic could have been one of the prejudices that the Muggle-born face. It's something wizards, with their lack of logical skills, would believe. As it is now, though, it's just something pastede on.

* In an uncharacteristic moment, Ron displays a rudimentary knowledge of logical thinking. Too bad the wizards are not known for their logical skills (see PS/SS). Otherwise they'd see that stealing magic would be impossible.

* Why doesn't Lupin try to persuade Harry to tell him what the mission is?

* For that matter, why doesn't Harry ever ask himself why Dumbledore wanted only Harry, Hermione and Ron to know about Horcruxes? Because there's no earthly reason why a few trustworthy adults shouldn't know. I doubt they'd go off to make a few Horcruxes for themselves.

* How has Tonks managed to become pregnant? It's clear that Lupin didn't want it. Am I supposed to conclude that Tonks stopped taking her contraceptive potion without telling her husband? Because if that's the case, I don't wonder at all that Lupin is a bit miffed.

* How stupid is Tonks for getting pregnant in the middle of a war? Maybe she hopes that her child will be the second Boy-Who-Lived.

* Oh my god, here comes Harry's holier-than-thou act. Brace yourselves.

* Um, Lupin, lycanthropy is an acquired characteristic. Acquired characteristics aren't passed along to the next generation. Though I'm not surprised Lupin not knowing that. I'd imagine that wizards would have very little knowledge about genetics. Unlike us ignorant Muggles.

* I hate what Rowling did to Remus here. Where's the ever-calm Lupin of PoA and OotP? Somehow I don't see that person being badgered into a marriage against his will. Damn you, Rowling. Stop destroying characters I like.

* Okay, Harry, you have gone too far. If I were your mother, I'd send you to your room without dessert until you saw the error of your ways and apologised to Lupin.

* On the other hand, Lupin the Marauder really might have been feeling a little bit of a daredevil. Too bad this Lupin bears no resemblance to Marauder!Lupin.

* Hermione asks how Harry could have done what he did. The answer is: easily. Harry doesn't care about other people.

* Harry feels remorse! Colour me shocked.

* Oh lord, more about the Dumbledore story. It's getting old. And boring. Most of all boring.

* Harry wants to visit Godric's Hollow. The boy just can't keep his mind on his task. Which, by the way, he just refused to share with someone who'd probably have been a great help.

* It seems to me that defeating Voldemort isn't really Harry's priority. His priority is to do what Dumbledore told him to do and to find out the truth about Dumbledore. Hmm, he's really obsessed with Dumbledore, isn't he?

* Kreacher is all "yes, Master, sorry, Master". Nooooooo, don't ruin Kreacher! Damn you, JKR!

* Mundungus is right, Sirius never cared about all the valuable items in 12 Grimmauld Place. In fact, he did his best to rid the house of them. Why shouldn't Mundungus have taken them?

* Oh, I like avenging!Kreacher. "Perhaps just one more, Master Harry, for luck?" *dissolves in giggles*




Designated Hero:
Our hero is characterised by his great ability to rage love.

Foley Work:
Crack! Kreacher apparates.

IITS:
I wonder why the Death Eaters left their enemies alive. I declare IITS.

Idiot Picture:
People don't realise Voldemort has taken over the Ministry. (That was the second time I almost wrote "Dumbledore" instead of "Voldemort". A Freudian slip, I suppose.)

Idiot World:
Dumbledore told us not to tell anyone about our quest, so we don't. Never mind if it means the baddies will win.

McGuffin:
The Horcruxes. Which Harry forgets he should be chasing in his quest to find out the Truth about Bumblebore.

Misdirected Answering:
Dumbledore, Dumbledore, Dumbledore, Dumbledore.

Nut o' Fun:
Kreacher and the saucepan!

Spring-Loaded Cat:
Lupin and his masterful way of getting past Moody extra special wards.

Whooshing Powder:
Whoosh, Lupin is gone. The next time we see him he's an enthusiastic new father. *gags*

Final score: 10. Wow! This chapter really is something quite special. If by "special" one means "sporkable".

Comments

[tdotm.livejournal.com]

Ron and Hermione’s bickering got old in Book 5. Lavender added a bit of a different twist, but things should have been sorted out completely by the end of Book 6, and Book 7 reserved for the main plot. Still, if their marriage fails, Hermione can just wipe Ron’s memory and move on to the next fool who wants a free will obliterating/cringer to the Boy who Lived/Umbridge Wannabe (wannabe and succeeding, let‘s face it). I’m assured by my statistically accurate survey of one bloke, that as JKR and Hollywood started to push Hermione as this gorgeous young girl, the character became more and more sexless and unattractive. Apparently wanting to be emasculated is a speciality desire, not one for the masses.

As for Moody’s wards, I have to say (again!) why does JKR add these things that add absolutely nothing to the story except make it/her look stupid? Secret Keeping in Book 7 is a steaming pile of Dragon Pucky. Why not say that it was possible to have a Secret Keeper in line, who’d automatically take over if the original one died. Instead of this ‘everyone who knew the secret becomes a Secret Keeper’ B*ll*cks. Then the new Secret Keeper would have to tell people the secret again, Snape wouldn’t be an issue, and we wouldn’t have this embarrassing nonsense which wouldn’t frighten Book One Neville. Also, for the thousandth time, why didn’t she say Bill and Arthur were each other’s Secret Keepers instead of violently kicking in the head of one of her key moments in the entire series (The Potters betrayed by Peter their SECRET KEEPER)!! Arrrrrgggghhhh!

Apparition my arse. That’s lost me too. Why didn’t Harry just call Dobby to apparate him to the Burrow, or wherever? Sorry, I just can’t let that go. When they start dully starving in a tent, (coming soon I fear) the whole issue of House Elves, the non usage of, might well come up again for discussion.

I have a strange and unusual theory regarding Secret Keeping. I suspect that the rules aren’t consistent, but change to fit the story as and when. I know, I know, sounds ridiculous, but think about it. Conspiracy theories aside, I have reason to believe it’s true. See also Fidelius Charms, Enchantments, Any sort of magical protection on a property, Apparition, Polyjuice Potions, Memory Charms, Wandlore, The Trace, Numbers of Pupils at Hogwarts, Moral attitudes towards using Unforgiveable Curses, Voldemort's aptitude as a Dark Lord, Dumbledore's character, Hermione's intelligence, Ron's knowledge of the world he was bought up in, The Enslavement of the House Elves etc . And Secret Keeping.

I know that some people here say that what’s on the page is canon, and I should accept that Lupin is now a whiny cowardly git. As a student he was too easy going, in order to keep his closest friends happy - they'd becom Animagi to care for him. However as a man he was bitter enough to be able to kill Pettigrew in cold blood. I‘m not convinced he‘d go through with a marriage he didn’t want. The good natured Order Member and mentor to the tiresome Harry, would apparently happily abandon said silly wife while she was pregnant? (Don't ask me why she decided that the desperate bundle of weirdos and ratbags that make up the Order could easily spare a fully trained Auror from their ranks, as their world plunged into war, so spent her time chasing Mr Unkeen ) But I refuse to accept it, no-one can make me. JKR doesn’t derive changes naturally from events in her characters recent past, or the natural growing up process. She just randomly and jarringly introduces them to suit her needs at the moment. If she won’t make the effort to keep her characterizations consistent, I’ll do it for her. This *isn’t* Lupin - and don’t try to tell me otherwise.

Maybe lycanthropy *is* inherited in this world, and the changes happen at genetic level - JKR can do what she wants, it‘s all magic! Sadly I fear that if you asked Book 3 Remus, he’d have agreed with you. This is probably JKR indulging herself with yet more new ‘facts’ to add pathos to the crap sub plot she was currently writing. Instead of just dumping it with the rest of the rubbish.

I still wish Kreacher had betrayed them. It’d have been worth his certain death to be able to tell Harry to go swivel.

[jodel-from-aol.livejournal.com]

Oh, absolutely. The Fidelius Excuse changed every time Rowling used it. We got a *major* contadiction in the way it worked between PoA, when it was first explained to us, and OotP when we got a chance to see it in action. To the point that if the Keeper is able to *share* the secret with anyone he pleases, why did Peter's telling Tom about it *break* it?

In fact, if the secret can be limitlessly shared, how does one *release* the secret at all? Do you have the Keeper take out an ad in the Prophet?

For that matter, the way it's set up in DHs directly contradicts the way Rowling explained it on her website when the question of what happens when the Keeper dies won the FAQ Poll.

But that's not any theory on how it works in the story arc. It's just stupid lazy shoddy writing by an author who is convinced that her audience will swallow anything. And it may be one of the worst examples, but its hardly the only one. Rowling doesn't believe in magic, so she doesn't bother to make it consistent. And probably is contemptuous of the readers who expect the rules to make sense. I rather suspect that she was thumbing her nose at us all through HBP and DHs.

[anehan]

For that matter, the way it's set up in DHs directly contradicts the way Rowling explained it on her website when the question of what happens when the Keeper dies won the FAQ Poll.

Really? Do you remember what she said in her website?

[jodel-from-aol.livejournal.com]

Well, there was absolutely not one word about anyone that the former Keeper ever shared the secret with becoming a default secret Keeper themselves.

In fact, iirc, she stated flat out that if the Keeper dies the secret is frozen in that state. The people who have been filled in by the original keeper remember, but cannot tell anyone about it.

[anehan]

I so much hoped that Lavender/Ron would have lasted. I really liked that relationship. It was very believable.

I have a strange and unusual theory regarding Secret Keeping. I suspect that the rules aren’t consistent, but change to fit the story as and when.

Absolutely. And as you note, it's not the only thing that changes according to JKR's whims.

I know that some people here say that what’s on the page is canon, and I should accept that Lupin is now a whiny cowardly git.

I've never seen Lupin as a coward. I know that many people do, because of his inability to control his friends when he was a prefect, etc. To me, his character reads more as someone who just doesn't want to go to the trouble of standing up to his friends. To me he isn't a moral coward, but a morally dubious person. See his ability to plan Pettigrew's murder in cold blood.

[cressida0201.livejournal.com]

I've never seen Lupin as a coward either, and I think I've figured out why. I just don't think he ever had the power, in his relationship with James and Sirius, to stop them from doing anything they wanted to do. To James and Sirius, Lupin was the charity boy, not someone to be listened to. It's like Ron trying to discipline the Twins (and why do I never hear anyone call him a moral coward?). In neither case did a prefect's badge magically grant power/authority to someone who didn't have it to begin with.

[anehan]

I just don't think he ever had the power, in his relationship with James and Sirius, to stop them from doing anything they wanted to do.

ITA.

[cressida0201.livejournal.com]

I know that some people here say that what’s on the page is canon, and I should accept that Lupin is now a whiny cowardly git.

Well, the Bikini Girls are on the page now too, and I don't see a lot of people (who weren't already inclined to do so) accepting Sirius as straight! *evil grin*