Deathly Hallows Chapter 12
Jul. 28th, 2009 10:15 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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deathtocapslockFinally! I tell you, this chapter was nearly the death of me!
Magic Is Might
The narrator sprite on Harry’s shoulder decides to take a holiday during August and goes to stay with the Muggle neighbors.
I think the reason for this is that Hermione was practicing her mind spells on it, because it not only doesn’t recognize the signature cloaks of the Death Eaters, but it can’t even remember those Death Eaters it has previously been introduced to. So, Dolohov becomes “the one with the twisted face” and Peter Petigrew becomes “his podgy, pallid companion.”
Fortunately, however, the narrator sprite manages to catch onto Harry’s briefly exposed elbow and we get to rejoin the Trio as they plan to infiltrate the Ministry of Magic in search of the locket Horcrux.
First, however, Harry brings us the news that… sorry, that’s second. The first thing that happens is that Harry has to sit through the wards the Moody set up to annoy Snape should he ever show up. Stupid wards.
Secondly, Harry must encounter Kreacher, who is now clean, neat, and happy. The moral here is clear. If you want your servants to do their jobs, give them worthless trinkets.
Thirdly, Harry delivers the news (on September 1st) that Snape has been confirmed as the Headmaster of Hogwarts. I’m sure most fans were horrified that evil old Snape was now Headmaster. Me, I was horrified that he didn’t get confirmed until the kids arrived. How is he supposed to review lesson plans, or schedules? Inconsiderate!
Hermione realizes that Phineas Nigelllus could spy on them for Snape and sticks his portrait in her purse—thereby ensuring that Snape will be able to spy on them later on.
Kreacher is now serving delicious French onion soup to his master. French cuisine. How Edwardian.
Ron and Harry grouse about Snape for a moment and then sort of commiserate on missing the fun of going to Hogwarts, where they could join Ginny, Neville, and Luna in uncivil disobedience. Yeah, that Snape.. He’s so terrible! Wish we could be under his thumb!
Harry mentions that he nearly slipped when he landed on the front stoop. Ron is careful to let Harry know that he’s worse than Harry and does it all the time. Thus he fulfills his duty as the Trio member who makes Harry look good.
The Trio discuss their plans to infiltrate the Ministry of Magic. The plan—Omigod, never mind what it entails. It’s completely stupid and boring. The Trio are planning this thing like it’s Ocean’s Eleven. Except for the fact that the Ocean’s gang had a plan that involved doing things after they got into the front door.
Also, this is I think a writing thing. If you are going to write a heist, then you need to let the reader in on it. We get a lot of details that don’t mean anything, like that you need tokens to get into the Ministry, and that Dolore’s office is on Level One. Yawn. Before I can care, I need to know what the Trio plans to achieve with this super-dangerous mission. All I really know is that they want to get the locket from Dolores and common sense tells me she’s more likely to store that in her home than in her office.
So, are they going for the locket or for her address? Cause I’ll bet they could get the address from Arthur or Kingsley Shacklebolt.
Oh well, time for another Voldievision! This is the vision of Voldemort looking for Gregorovitch, finding instead a mother and children and killing them all. Since we know already that Voldemort is looking for Gregorovitch, and we know that Hermione thinks Harry ought to use Occlumency, the only nugget of information this particular vision imparts is the notion that Lily’s mother-love, in and of itself, is not enough to decorporalize a wizard.
The other thing that happens is that Harry makes a choice to disregard Dumbledore’s instructions, when he tells Hermione that he’s going to use his Voldemort connection to find out why Voldemort is seeking Gregorovitch. If there’s any significance to that, it’s beyond me.
Next day, the heist begins!
As I glean from their actions, the Trio’s plan consists of stealing the identities of three different Ministry employees, Mafalda Hopkirk, Reg Cattermole, and Albert Runcorn. They are clever enough to use three different methods to prevent these people from entering the Ministry, but I can think of a cleverer plan right off the bat: Don’t send three people, send one person with the invisibility cloak. Three people just means more chances of screwing up.
By the way, Reg Cattermole (as others have noted) has an interesting name, literature-wise. In Gaudy Night, a mystery by Dorothy L. Sayers, Reg Pomfret was a puppyish Oxford student who developed a crush on Harriet Vane (Lord Peter Wimsey’s eventual wife). When he gets over her, he starts a relationship with Cattermole (first name unknown), a young female student. I’d be willing to bet that Reg and Mary Cattermole are an homage to Sayers—who subverted the Mystery genre very nicely in her books.
Was anyone rolling on the floor laughing when Reg started vomiting on Hermione/Mafalda’s shoes? I get the impression that it’s supposed to be a comic moment, but the only time I ever found vomit humor funny was during that scene in Monty Python’s Meaning of Life.
Due to increased security, most employees cannot floo directly to the Ministry, but must enter through a public toilet and then flush themselves down the loo. I imagine that this public toilet must have acquired quite a reputation in London by now, what with the masses of cloaked men who enter it and then stay for hours before leaving. In the sixties, that sort of thing would get one arrested.
After gaping at the new, fascist-style statuary in the atrium, Harry is beckoned by “a wispy little witch and the ferrety wizard from Magical Maintenance.” Apparently Hermione has been practicing her memory charms on Harry, too, since he cannot recognize his best friends with whom he parted only thirty seconds earlier.
Gotta give JKR props for the statue though, it’s pretty horrifying.
Ron is stopped by Death Eater cum Minister Yaxley, who demands that Ron fix his office. He also threatens “Reg’s” wife, Mary, who has been called in for questioning by the Muggle-born Commission. Upshot? The fate of an innocent woman rests on Ron’s ability to fix magical plumbing. She’s doomed.
Hermione’s advice? Finite Incantatem. You know. That spell they learned second year from Snape. Seems as though Yaxley should have been able to figure that one out by himself. Oh well, maybe he’s too important to mutter a few words in order to fix it.
Hermione, trying to coach Ron on how to fix the office as they ride up the elevator is very reminiscent of her trying to coach Neville into making his Shrinking Solution back in third year.
JKR neatly sets another Chekhovian gun in place when a junior Minister winks at Harry and thanks him for doing something awful to Dirk Cresswell (from the Goblin Liaison office). Dirk Cresswell, we might remember (although after all those memory charms, Harry will not), was one of Slughorn’s favored students.
The lift opens to dramatically reveal Dolores Umbridge, chatting with Minister of Magic Pius Thicknesse. With that, the chapter thankfully comes to a close.
It occurs to me that this “hesist” is a place where Lupin would have come in handy. He spent a year in meetings where the Order went over the blueprints for the Ministry. He probably did his share of guarding the Prophecy under Moody’s extra invisibility cloak. So, he’d be able to give the Trio a lot of useful information on how to get in and out of the place. Of course, Tonks would be even more useful, if she weren’t in confinement.
Fan Service:
Mafalda Hopkick! In the flesh!
Dirk Cresswell! We are well rewarded for the hours we spent memorizing random names mentioned in earlier books.
Fan Slappage:
Those who thought Harry was going to get smarter in this book were sadly mistaken.
DVD Extras:
INT: DAY -- MINISTRY OF MAGIC, MAGICAL LAW ENFORCEMENT OFFICE
MINISTER YAXLEY is packing up his briefcase held by his assistant, PERCY WEASLEY.
YAXLEY
I’ll be at this meeting for the rest of the day. Make sure that memo gets to Runcorn and then go get me that report from Azkaban. I’ll expect it on my desk by tomorrow morning.
PERCY
Yes, sir.
Yaxley closes his briefcase and makes for the door, colliding with a YOUNG WITCH holding a sheaf of parchments.
WITCH
New list of suspects to—oof!
YAXLEY
Out of my way! Talk to Weatherby about that!
Yaxley rushes out the door. The witch turns to Percy, smoothing her robes down.
WITCH
Weather—oh! I know you. You were Head Boy at Hogwarts.
PERCY
Right. Percy Weatherby.
He shakes her hand.
WITCH
I thought your name was Weasley.
PERCY
Yes. Minister Crouch used to forget my name and call me Weatherby. It became a big joke and everyone started doing it. Then they forgot my real name. It’s easier this way.
WITCH
I see. Well, can you please sign for these?
PERCY signs the receipt in triplicate, smiling at the way the witch is playing with her hair.
PERCY
There you go.
WITCH
See you round… Weatherby!
She smiles and sashays out the door. Percy turns to follow, but his eye is caught by the sheaf of parchments now lying on the Minister’s desk.
INSERT : PILE OF PARCHMENT
The top piece shows a picture of Arthur Weasley, looking shifty and worried. In large type, the words WANTED FOR QUESTIONING appear above his face.
CUT TO;
PERCY’S FACE
He gazes down silently at the parchement. He reaches out a hand to take it, but then draws his hand back. Thoughts play over his face as he considers his options.
Percy steps backward, raising his wand, which transforms into an umbrella. As he holds it above his head, a light shoots out the point of it.
The light reaches the ceiling of the office and explodes into rolling grey clouds. Within seconds, a downpour starts, raining down everywhere in the office, except for the exact spot where Percy is standing beneath the shelter of the umbrella.
Percy continues to gaze at the parchment. The black ink on the picture of Arthur begins to bleed, dissolving in the water until the entire pile is a soggy mess.
Percy steps carefully to the door, picking through the water puddles. He steps through the door, closing the umbrella and shaking it free of water. By the time he is completely through the door, the umbrella has transformed back into a wand.
Percy nods officiously at the wizards working in the outer office and heads down the hallway, whistling softly to himself.
FADE OUT
Magic Is Might
The narrator sprite on Harry’s shoulder decides to take a holiday during August and goes to stay with the Muggle neighbors.
I think the reason for this is that Hermione was practicing her mind spells on it, because it not only doesn’t recognize the signature cloaks of the Death Eaters, but it can’t even remember those Death Eaters it has previously been introduced to. So, Dolohov becomes “the one with the twisted face” and Peter Petigrew becomes “his podgy, pallid companion.”
Fortunately, however, the narrator sprite manages to catch onto Harry’s briefly exposed elbow and we get to rejoin the Trio as they plan to infiltrate the Ministry of Magic in search of the locket Horcrux.
First, however, Harry brings us the news that… sorry, that’s second. The first thing that happens is that Harry has to sit through the wards the Moody set up to annoy Snape should he ever show up. Stupid wards.
Secondly, Harry must encounter Kreacher, who is now clean, neat, and happy. The moral here is clear. If you want your servants to do their jobs, give them worthless trinkets.
Thirdly, Harry delivers the news (on September 1st) that Snape has been confirmed as the Headmaster of Hogwarts. I’m sure most fans were horrified that evil old Snape was now Headmaster. Me, I was horrified that he didn’t get confirmed until the kids arrived. How is he supposed to review lesson plans, or schedules? Inconsiderate!
Hermione realizes that Phineas Nigelllus could spy on them for Snape and sticks his portrait in her purse—thereby ensuring that Snape will be able to spy on them later on.
Kreacher is now serving delicious French onion soup to his master. French cuisine. How Edwardian.
Ron and Harry grouse about Snape for a moment and then sort of commiserate on missing the fun of going to Hogwarts, where they could join Ginny, Neville, and Luna in uncivil disobedience. Yeah, that Snape.. He’s so terrible! Wish we could be under his thumb!
Harry mentions that he nearly slipped when he landed on the front stoop. Ron is careful to let Harry know that he’s worse than Harry and does it all the time. Thus he fulfills his duty as the Trio member who makes Harry look good.
The Trio discuss their plans to infiltrate the Ministry of Magic. The plan—Omigod, never mind what it entails. It’s completely stupid and boring. The Trio are planning this thing like it’s Ocean’s Eleven. Except for the fact that the Ocean’s gang had a plan that involved doing things after they got into the front door.
Also, this is I think a writing thing. If you are going to write a heist, then you need to let the reader in on it. We get a lot of details that don’t mean anything, like that you need tokens to get into the Ministry, and that Dolore’s office is on Level One. Yawn. Before I can care, I need to know what the Trio plans to achieve with this super-dangerous mission. All I really know is that they want to get the locket from Dolores and common sense tells me she’s more likely to store that in her home than in her office.
So, are they going for the locket or for her address? Cause I’ll bet they could get the address from Arthur or Kingsley Shacklebolt.
Oh well, time for another Voldievision! This is the vision of Voldemort looking for Gregorovitch, finding instead a mother and children and killing them all. Since we know already that Voldemort is looking for Gregorovitch, and we know that Hermione thinks Harry ought to use Occlumency, the only nugget of information this particular vision imparts is the notion that Lily’s mother-love, in and of itself, is not enough to decorporalize a wizard.
The other thing that happens is that Harry makes a choice to disregard Dumbledore’s instructions, when he tells Hermione that he’s going to use his Voldemort connection to find out why Voldemort is seeking Gregorovitch. If there’s any significance to that, it’s beyond me.
Next day, the heist begins!
As I glean from their actions, the Trio’s plan consists of stealing the identities of three different Ministry employees, Mafalda Hopkirk, Reg Cattermole, and Albert Runcorn. They are clever enough to use three different methods to prevent these people from entering the Ministry, but I can think of a cleverer plan right off the bat: Don’t send three people, send one person with the invisibility cloak. Three people just means more chances of screwing up.
By the way, Reg Cattermole (as others have noted) has an interesting name, literature-wise. In Gaudy Night, a mystery by Dorothy L. Sayers, Reg Pomfret was a puppyish Oxford student who developed a crush on Harriet Vane (Lord Peter Wimsey’s eventual wife). When he gets over her, he starts a relationship with Cattermole (first name unknown), a young female student. I’d be willing to bet that Reg and Mary Cattermole are an homage to Sayers—who subverted the Mystery genre very nicely in her books.
Was anyone rolling on the floor laughing when Reg started vomiting on Hermione/Mafalda’s shoes? I get the impression that it’s supposed to be a comic moment, but the only time I ever found vomit humor funny was during that scene in Monty Python’s Meaning of Life.
Due to increased security, most employees cannot floo directly to the Ministry, but must enter through a public toilet and then flush themselves down the loo. I imagine that this public toilet must have acquired quite a reputation in London by now, what with the masses of cloaked men who enter it and then stay for hours before leaving. In the sixties, that sort of thing would get one arrested.
After gaping at the new, fascist-style statuary in the atrium, Harry is beckoned by “a wispy little witch and the ferrety wizard from Magical Maintenance.” Apparently Hermione has been practicing her memory charms on Harry, too, since he cannot recognize his best friends with whom he parted only thirty seconds earlier.
Gotta give JKR props for the statue though, it’s pretty horrifying.
Ron is stopped by Death Eater cum Minister Yaxley, who demands that Ron fix his office. He also threatens “Reg’s” wife, Mary, who has been called in for questioning by the Muggle-born Commission. Upshot? The fate of an innocent woman rests on Ron’s ability to fix magical plumbing. She’s doomed.
Hermione’s advice? Finite Incantatem. You know. That spell they learned second year from Snape. Seems as though Yaxley should have been able to figure that one out by himself. Oh well, maybe he’s too important to mutter a few words in order to fix it.
Hermione, trying to coach Ron on how to fix the office as they ride up the elevator is very reminiscent of her trying to coach Neville into making his Shrinking Solution back in third year.
JKR neatly sets another Chekhovian gun in place when a junior Minister winks at Harry and thanks him for doing something awful to Dirk Cresswell (from the Goblin Liaison office). Dirk Cresswell, we might remember (although after all those memory charms, Harry will not), was one of Slughorn’s favored students.
The lift opens to dramatically reveal Dolores Umbridge, chatting with Minister of Magic Pius Thicknesse. With that, the chapter thankfully comes to a close.
It occurs to me that this “hesist” is a place where Lupin would have come in handy. He spent a year in meetings where the Order went over the blueprints for the Ministry. He probably did his share of guarding the Prophecy under Moody’s extra invisibility cloak. So, he’d be able to give the Trio a lot of useful information on how to get in and out of the place. Of course, Tonks would be even more useful, if she weren’t in confinement.
Fan Service:
Mafalda Hopkick! In the flesh!
Dirk Cresswell! We are well rewarded for the hours we spent memorizing random names mentioned in earlier books.
Fan Slappage:
Those who thought Harry was going to get smarter in this book were sadly mistaken.
DVD Extras:
INT: DAY -- MINISTRY OF MAGIC, MAGICAL LAW ENFORCEMENT OFFICE
MINISTER YAXLEY is packing up his briefcase held by his assistant, PERCY WEASLEY.
YAXLEY
I’ll be at this meeting for the rest of the day. Make sure that memo gets to Runcorn and then go get me that report from Azkaban. I’ll expect it on my desk by tomorrow morning.
PERCY
Yes, sir.
Yaxley closes his briefcase and makes for the door, colliding with a YOUNG WITCH holding a sheaf of parchments.
WITCH
New list of suspects to—oof!
YAXLEY
Out of my way! Talk to Weatherby about that!
Yaxley rushes out the door. The witch turns to Percy, smoothing her robes down.
WITCH
Weather—oh! I know you. You were Head Boy at Hogwarts.
PERCY
Right. Percy Weatherby.
He shakes her hand.
WITCH
I thought your name was Weasley.
PERCY
Yes. Minister Crouch used to forget my name and call me Weatherby. It became a big joke and everyone started doing it. Then they forgot my real name. It’s easier this way.
WITCH
I see. Well, can you please sign for these?
PERCY signs the receipt in triplicate, smiling at the way the witch is playing with her hair.
PERCY
There you go.
WITCH
See you round… Weatherby!
She smiles and sashays out the door. Percy turns to follow, but his eye is caught by the sheaf of parchments now lying on the Minister’s desk.
INSERT : PILE OF PARCHMENT
The top piece shows a picture of Arthur Weasley, looking shifty and worried. In large type, the words WANTED FOR QUESTIONING appear above his face.
CUT TO;
PERCY’S FACE
He gazes down silently at the parchement. He reaches out a hand to take it, but then draws his hand back. Thoughts play over his face as he considers his options.
Percy steps backward, raising his wand, which transforms into an umbrella. As he holds it above his head, a light shoots out the point of it.
The light reaches the ceiling of the office and explodes into rolling grey clouds. Within seconds, a downpour starts, raining down everywhere in the office, except for the exact spot where Percy is standing beneath the shelter of the umbrella.
Percy continues to gaze at the parchment. The black ink on the picture of Arthur begins to bleed, dissolving in the water until the entire pile is a soggy mess.
Percy steps carefully to the door, picking through the water puddles. He steps through the door, closing the umbrella and shaking it free of water. By the time he is completely through the door, the umbrella has transformed back into a wand.
Percy nods officiously at the wizards working in the outer office and heads down the hallway, whistling softly to himself.
FADE OUT
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no subject
Date: 2009-07-29 02:40 pm (UTC)With the Death Eaters not present, the Trio could have gone back to school. Then we could have *seen* the attempts to undermine Snape, who for all his loyalty to Lily would make Harry's life hell. The Trio could be involved in constantly trying to get the sword and Dumbledore's Army - vigilante version. They could aquire the locket from Umbridge on one of her visits and take it down to the Chamber of Secrets and destroy it. All that sitting around in a tent not knowing what to do, could have happened at Hogwarts with all the more interesting characters around them to pass the time.
This book could have been interesting!
no subject
Date: 2009-07-31 04:20 am (UTC)