A bit late.
Sep. 13th, 2005 11:17 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
jollityfarm.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
deathtocapslockBut you know you don't mind :) I know you'll all be out of the woodwork for chapter five, which features the incomparable Ginny. But right now, it's Super-Sluggy!
*It's true, Apparition does sound like a back-to-the-womb/rebirth scenario. Being forced through a very tight rubber tube? Mmm-hmm.
*Maybe Lord Voldemort was also hoping not to see into Harry's angst-ridden teenage brain. Just as well he won't be looking later on in the story, when Harry has significant dreams about Ginny. I don't know about you, but that'd piss me right offalthough Voldemort's had Ginny more intimately than Harry, haha.
*Budleigh Babberton sounds like it's also in the Westcountry. Very similar to the name of a real place.
*Very annoyed at Dumbledore not telling Harry what's going on at once. Whyever not? Oh yes, drama and all that, but "Oh, I think we'll find a use for you" is a bit...well, you know :(
*So yeah, we're not supposed to Apparate into a wizard's house because that would be rude, but it's okay to barge into the Dursley household because...oh yes, they're rude already, and deserved it by treating Harry badly blah blah. It's always correct and right to sink down to the level of people you deem to be unworthy.
*Surely Harry would have heard of zombies? Surely he would have said of the Inferi, "Sounds a bit like zombies, sir, like in Dudley's Zombie BrainFest IV Playstation thing (as a completely off-topic aside, what does Dudley do when he needs an opponent for two-player games? Does he demand one of his mates comes round or something? Because I'm sure we'd all agree that Harry wouldn't be allowed to touch the console in case he gave it fleas, so does Dudley just play against the computer? Must get boring)
*Maybe the armchair was breathing. Or maybe there's a special way to tell the difference between real chairs and chair disguise. Anyway, totally not going into the wand-poke there.
*Dumbledore is tall and thin, while Sluggy is both short and round. Fat, also. Let's not forget about the fat. We certainly won't be neglecting to mention the fat. The fat will be gone into at regular intervals in case we are in danger of forgetting about the fat. Fat fat fat fat fat.
*Hmm, short legs that don't touch the floor. I am suddenly reminded of a certain D. Umbridge. I wonder if they're related. Maybe she's his sister. Or daughter O_O I guess he must be pretty old to have been teaching fifty years previously. We don't know how old either of them are supposed to be, mind. But I digress.
*Oh I see. Never liked Dolores Umbridge. Doesn't stop her being a relative, of course :) Or an ex...sorry. I'll leave it there.
*Blah blah Lily blah blah charming blah blah brightest ever blah blah vivacious blah blah ooh I've just come. Stupid Lily-Sue :(
*Slughorn doesn't want to risk dying, so he needs to be mocked? Right-O. If Sluggy wasn't such a Lily fanboy and obviously wanking under his desk about his faves, I'd like him for this alone. Don't want to die? Perfectly sensible in my opinion.
*Oh shut up, Dumbledore, with your fake-eccentric "Ooh, I love knitting patterns, me!" shite. It's actually not endearing in the slightest, because anyone with half a brain knows you're just being condescending.
*Harry and Sirius didn't have a long and happy relationship. They barely knew one another. Harry might be angsting about it, but that's just another form of self-pity in my opinion. "Lying on his bed refusing meals"? Oh shut up.
*So Harry's not to tell anyone - like Neville, for example - about the prophecy. You think Neville mightn't have wanted to know? It could have been him. But I forget, Neville isn't S-P-E-S-H-U-L. Neville's parents weren't so 1337 as Harry's and Neville wouldn't have been able to defeat Voldemort like the wonder that is Harry. Oh, but he's allowed to tell Ron and Hermione. Because that means they'll be able to do shit together. Oh yes. For crying out loud.
*In the meantime, Harry and Dumbledore are standing talking in a cramped outhouse. Why? We may never care.
*It's true, Apparition does sound like a back-to-the-womb/rebirth scenario. Being forced through a very tight rubber tube? Mmm-hmm.
*Maybe Lord Voldemort was also hoping not to see into Harry's angst-ridden teenage brain. Just as well he won't be looking later on in the story, when Harry has significant dreams about Ginny. I don't know about you, but that'd piss me right off
*Budleigh Babberton sounds like it's also in the Westcountry. Very similar to the name of a real place.
*Very annoyed at Dumbledore not telling Harry what's going on at once. Whyever not? Oh yes, drama and all that, but "Oh, I think we'll find a use for you" is a bit...well, you know :(
*So yeah, we're not supposed to Apparate into a wizard's house because that would be rude, but it's okay to barge into the Dursley household because...oh yes, they're rude already, and deserved it by treating Harry badly blah blah. It's always correct and right to sink down to the level of people you deem to be unworthy.
*Surely Harry would have heard of zombies? Surely he would have said of the Inferi, "Sounds a bit like zombies, sir, like in Dudley's Zombie BrainFest IV Playstation thing (as a completely off-topic aside, what does Dudley do when he needs an opponent for two-player games? Does he demand one of his mates comes round or something? Because I'm sure we'd all agree that Harry wouldn't be allowed to touch the console in case he gave it fleas, so does Dudley just play against the computer? Must get boring)
*Maybe the armchair was breathing. Or maybe there's a special way to tell the difference between real chairs and chair disguise. Anyway, totally not going into the wand-poke there.
*Dumbledore is tall and thin, while Sluggy is both short and round. Fat, also. Let's not forget about the fat. We certainly won't be neglecting to mention the fat. The fat will be gone into at regular intervals in case we are in danger of forgetting about the fat. Fat fat fat fat fat.
*Hmm, short legs that don't touch the floor. I am suddenly reminded of a certain D. Umbridge. I wonder if they're related. Maybe she's his sister. Or daughter O_O I guess he must be pretty old to have been teaching fifty years previously. We don't know how old either of them are supposed to be, mind. But I digress.
*Oh I see. Never liked Dolores Umbridge. Doesn't stop her being a relative, of course :) Or an ex...sorry. I'll leave it there.
*Blah blah Lily blah blah charming blah blah brightest ever blah blah vivacious blah blah ooh I've just come. Stupid Lily-Sue :(
*Slughorn doesn't want to risk dying, so he needs to be mocked? Right-O. If Sluggy wasn't such a Lily fanboy and obviously wanking under his desk about his faves, I'd like him for this alone. Don't want to die? Perfectly sensible in my opinion.
*Oh shut up, Dumbledore, with your fake-eccentric "Ooh, I love knitting patterns, me!" shite. It's actually not endearing in the slightest, because anyone with half a brain knows you're just being condescending.
*Harry and Sirius didn't have a long and happy relationship. They barely knew one another. Harry might be angsting about it, but that's just another form of self-pity in my opinion. "Lying on his bed refusing meals"? Oh shut up.
*So Harry's not to tell anyone - like Neville, for example - about the prophecy. You think Neville mightn't have wanted to know? It could have been him. But I forget, Neville isn't S-P-E-S-H-U-L. Neville's parents weren't so 1337 as Harry's and Neville wouldn't have been able to defeat Voldemort like the wonder that is Harry. Oh, but he's allowed to tell Ron and Hermione. Because that means they'll be able to do shit together. Oh yes. For crying out loud.
*In the meantime, Harry and Dumbledore are standing talking in a cramped outhouse. Why? We may never care.
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no subject
Date: 2005-09-13 11:50 am (UTC)I find myself having as little patience for Perfect Lily as I have for Grrl Powerz Ginny by now. I find them both equally irritating - if there were any more MWPP era flashbacks in this book I would have ODed on Sue.
Slughorn doesn't want to risk dying, so he needs to be mocked?
He`s a COWARD for not wanting to die. Worst crime ever. As Sirius so wisely reminded Peter everyone must be ready to die or be wounded horribly in face of torture/mortal danger - or else you`re nothing but a slimy, disgusting COWARD. And we can`t have that. Not in this
idioticwarrior culture.no subject
Date: 2005-09-13 01:59 pm (UTC)Also, Sluggy is a coward for not only not wanting to die, but also for preferring to spend his days in an actual house rather than "living in a cave and eating rats" as Sirius did. Thing is, Sirius got his chance to spend time in an actual house, but he wasn't interested and supposedly wanted to be out fighting Dementors and soforth. So yeah, can't bring myself to feel any actual sympathy, since I would probably be more likely to go the Slughorn route (although why he doesn't flee the country disguised as a box of teabags or something is beyond me).
The whole "You must die for the cause like a TRUE WARRIOR" thing reminds me a bit of the more millitant straightedge punks, who think one's devotion to their favourite bands can be measured by the amount of injuries they're willing to sustain in a moshpit. If Harry was ever going to get into the Muggle hardcore scene, I think he'd quite like the straightedge crowd. He'd have to give up the butterbeer et al, but I daresay he'd relish the greater high of being able to bitch righteously at people for taking painkillers when they get ill.
no subject
Date: 2005-09-13 07:06 pm (UTC)Christ, I hope Harry spends the whole of Book Seven in a cave, rather than his cushy four-poster bed in the tapestry-covered medieval tower. And he can eat rats, instead of out of goblets and gold cutlery.
Put your money where your mouth is, and all that!
no subject
Date: 2005-09-14 12:57 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-19 03:48 am (UTC)And now, then have go throuh the line of pain, so that they, too can become warriors. And eating living eels!
no subject
Date: 2005-09-19 04:53 pm (UTC)The eel eating is still on! Unless Hermione sets up the Live Eel Liberation Front or something.