[identity profile] montavilla.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] deathtocapslock

Shell Cottage

We pause for a few days as Harry listens to the sound of the sea and contemplates the enormity of his decision not to prevent Voldemort from obtaining the Elder Wand.

Harry can’t remember ever choosing not to act in his life before. He must have forgotten all those time he chose not to practice Occlumency. Also, the time he chose not to try and figure what the screaming egg meant—even though everyone and Hermione kept pestering him about it.

JKR has Ron second-guessing Harry in an attempt to make Harry’s decision seem more important than it actually was. Harry can’t help but wonder if Ron is right and it was “outright madness” not to try to keep Voldemort from opening Dumbledore’s tomb.

Okay. I’ll play along, Harry. How exactly were you planning on stopping him? You’ve been stuck in hiding for months. You were dead tired and emotionally drained. Hermione was in a bathrobe for goodness sake. You were on the other side of the country.

So, you thought you’d just skip into Hogwarts—where Voldemort was fresh and deadly, and had at least three Death Eaters for back-up and do… what, exactly? Accio Dumbedore’s body?

Might I remind you that Snape wiped your butt last time you dueled?

Hermione sensibly reminds Harry that the Wand is Evil, and any plan to keep Voldemort from getting the wand would have meant breaking into Dumbledore’s tomb themselves. Which only results in Harry getting mad at Dumbledore all over again.

And leads into an argument about whether or not Dumbledore is actually dead. Of course he is. JKR told Salman Rushdie that he was. Shall we move on?

Fleur comes to deliver the message that Griphook is ready to talk. She’s irritated at Griphook for making her deliver that message. Also, her silver hair is flying around. I wonder if it that’s a Veela thing. Maybe their hair is like cat’s tails. When they get irritated, it waves around.

Griphook is in the tiniest bedroom (which Hermione and Luna share) and he’s drawn the curtains, which gives the room a red glow. Obvious demonic symbolism here as Harry prepares to make a deal with the devil, er Shylock, er… goblin.

Griphook says that he’ll help Harry in return for… payment. Harry, naturally enough, offers gold (which he has a bunch of in his vault). This insults Griphook who declares that he has plenty of gold himself, thank you very much. He wants the Sword of Gryffindor, which Harry refuses to give him.

So then Ron blunders even worse by offering treasure from Bellatrix’s vault—at which Griphook declares that he is not a thief. (Just an accomplice.)

And… now they’re all arguing about whether the Sword belongs to wizards or to goblins.

According to Griphook, the Sword originally belonged to Ragnuk the First, and was “taken” from him by Godric Gryffindor. Which could mean stolen, or it could mean that they dueled, or there was a war, or any number of things.

So… in trying to relate understand this (Reading Strategy 4.1 monitor and adjust comprehension using background knowledge), I think about such controversies as the Kennewick Man where Native Americans sued for the return of an ancient skeleton found on Federal land. In terms of shedding light on Harry’s situation, I conclude that it’s far too complicated to try and argue this conflict through on historical grounds, and they should come up with a different process.

[livejournal.com profile] jim_smith would point out that, by offering to help Harry in return for the sword, Griphook is acknowledging that he doesn’t already own the sword, so this entire argument about who does own it is moot.

At this point, Harry breaks off negotiations with Griphook in order to confer with Ron and Hermione. For the content of that discussion, I can do no better than to refer you to Jim Smith’s summary of this chapter:
Jim Smith pitches in for his brother who was killed by a poison duck (don’t ask).

It’s very long, and the part you’d want starts about midway through. The easiest way to find it is to do a page search for "Princess Leia slave costume." That will get you to the paragraph before the one you want to start on. Read through the dialogue and enjoy. ; )

So, the upshot is that Harry decides that he will give the Sword to Griphook (not that Harry has any special right to the Sword. Legally, it belongs to Hogwarts. Magically, it belongs to Ron). However, Harry needs the sword to destroy the Horcrux they find, plus the one they still don’t have a clue about, and possibly the one last encountered in Bathilda’s body, so he’ll leave out the part where he doesn’t hand it over immediately—but holds onto it. Possibly for years.

I haven’t spoken to any six-year-olds who read this book, but I’m pretty sure that all of them would be able to figure out that this is a Very Bad Idea. And Wrong, too.

Even Harry can figure out that it’s wrong. What he can’t figure out is that it’s also stupid.

Ron, naturally, thinks that it’s brilliant.

They return and Harry promises to give Griphook the Sword in payment for his help. Hermione, meanwhile, has the words “We’re LYING!” written all over her face.

Oh, would that were literally true! Wouldn’t it be so great if Griphook had magically cursed the agreement so that pustules broke out all over Harry’s face if he broke his promise? It would go so well with that “I must not tell lies” hand of his.

But, he doesn’t and so the Trio and Griphook start planning their heist. It takes… big surprise… weeks of drawing diagrams and flow charts and to do lists. Hermione notes that their store of Polyjuice potion is very low. There’s only enough to Polyjuice one person.

Okay…. So…. they are doing this for weeks. Hermione knows the recipe for Polyjuice. Any reason they don’t brew up another batch? No, I didn’t think so.

Of course, it would take them so long to brew it that they’d end up breaking in the vault later than June, when the students would be at home and unavailable for the big battle finish—but that’s JKR’s problem. Not theirs.

The more time the Trio spends with Griphook, the less they like him. He’s bloodthirsty, he enjoys the thought of pain for wizards and lesser creatures (so… why was he so impressed about Harry burying Dobby?), and he insists on kosher food.

Harry apologizes to Fleur for all the bother, so that she can remind him that he saved her sister’s life, so that Harry can remind us that Gabrielle was never in any real danger. Fleur. One of the many characters in the series to bow to Harry’s awesomeness for no logical reason.

Maybe he does have Veela blood in him. That would also explain the hair.

Harry assures Fleur that the Trio will soon be vacating her small cottage, whereupon Fleur starts to make Mrs. Weasley noises. “Of course you must not leave, you are safe ‘ere!”

Oh god. It’s like we’ve regressed back to Chapter Six! Please. Please. Don’t go backwards. We’ll never reach the end!

Fortunately, Luna and Dean break up the conversation by bringing in wood. Luna is exhibiting her friend-gathering behavior by telling Dean about Crumple-Horned Snorkacks and how her father found a horn for her… and now Hermione is arguing with her about whether it was a Snorckack or an Erumpent horn… God, we’re back in Chapter 20!

Snape! Where are you, Snape? Please come and rescue this story!

Fortunately, this is interrupted by Mr. Ollivander coming down the stairs on his way to Aunt Muriel’s. Fleur gives him her goblin-made tiara to return to Aunt Muriel. The tiara is important because 1) Griphook makes a comment, illustrating the goblin view towards ownership of goblin-made items, and 2) Luna reminds us that her father was working on a replica of the famous Lost Diadem of Ravenclaw.

There is a knock at the door! We get a little character snapshot as people react. Fleur looks frightened. Bill and the Trio draw their wands. Griphook slides under the table like the tiny, swarthy coward that he is.

“Who is it?” Bill calls out. What late night visitor is rapping, rapping on my chamber door?

“It is I!” replies Lupin, who must have been a member of the Hogwarts Melodrama Club. “I am a werewolf, married to Nymphodora Tonks, and you, the Secret-Keeper of Shell Cottage, told me the address and bade me come in an emergency!”

I think it’s a real pity that we’re stuck inside the house and missed all the sweeping arm gestures that must have accompanied that speech.

Once he gets in the door, Lupin turns the melodrama into soap opera. He bursts out that Tonks has had the baby, hugs Harry, and asks him to become “Teddy” Lupin’s godfather.

I have to pause for a moment because it just hurts. I can’t even snark.



There’s only one reason in the world why Lupin would name Harry as his son’s godfather. Because this book is about Harry.

Here are the reasons against naming Harry: He’s seventeen. He’s the most wanted wizard in the country. He’s on a secret mission that may take years or decades and can’t be found most of the time. He has absolutely no experience with children. He can’t even take proper care of an owl. People around him die with alarming frequency. He’s impulsive and thoughtless. He’s seventeen.

By the way, how come there are zillions of godfathers in the wizarding world and nary a godmother to be found?

So, Lupin stays and they drink wine and it’s all cozy and wonderful. Harry notices that Griphook doesn’t seem as pleased as everyone else (why the hell would he be?), and slinks off to his bedroom. Harry also notices Bill noticing the goblin leaving.

After Lupin finally goes back to his own family, Bill pulls Harry into the kitchen. I like this scene. Bill is being smart. He knows something is up, and he doesn’t try to baby Harry, but he does warn Harry that trying to cheat a goblin is a Very Bad Idea.

I have to laugh when Bill says that nobody can understand goblin ideas of ownership unless they have worked with goblins. According to the goblins, anything they make is only rented to humans for the period of one lifetime.

When I’m lucky, I get paid to write. I’m really far down on the writer’s scale and when I get paid, it’s Work for Hire. That means that whatever I write is paid for with a flat fee. I never get royalties. (Well, I do for plays… but only when I get paid at all, which is rarely.)

But, higher up on the scale, people get paid for what is called First Run Rights. Usually, they are writing for magazines or newspapers. That means that the publishers are allowed to print the article or story once. The writer retains ownership of the writing and is allowed to sell the rights for a second printing to another magazine or newspaper. If the first magazine wants to run the story again, they have to negotiate for that and pay a second fee.

It’s not that hard a concept. I didn’t need to work in publishing for years to understand it. I got it the first time I heard it.

Goblins are basically like writers. They are only selling First Run Ownership. They want to be paid for the Second Run.

Bill finishes up by saying it would be less dangerous to break into Gringott’s than to try and cheat a goblin. In this way, goblins are not like writers, since writers are basically wimps.

As the chapter ends, Harry wryly reflects that he is going to be just as reckless a godfather as Sirius Black was. Yeah, I could have told you that three books ago, Harry.

All we can do is pray that nothing happens to Lupin or Tonks.

Fan Service:
A million fanfics are born as the good ship Duna takes off.
Teddy Ruxpin Lupin is born, along with a million more new fanfics.
A million fangirls squeal as Harry becomes the new Sirius Black (I should have figured that out when Harry saw his reflection in the previous chapter and noted how long his black hair had become—along with the manly stubble on his chin.)

Fan Slappage:
Just when you thought Lupin couldn’t go any lower.
Oh, and apparently Lupin will have sex with a woman.

DVD Extras:
INT: NIGHT—SHELL COTTAGE’S SMALLEST BEDROOM

The door opens in the still room and warm light accompanies a burst of CHEERFUL CHATTER from the floor below. In start contrast, GRIPHOOK the goblin, who has entered, is silent and dour. He closes the door on the happy noise, limps over to the bed, and swings himself up into it.

He lights a lamp and then takes a small metallic device from his pocket. He unfolds it and presses a few buttons. Then he places it up to his ear.

GRIPHOOK
Gustov? Griphook…. Yes. It’s on…. I’m not sure when. These schmucks take forever to plan stuff…. We’ll be bringing the sword with us, so just make sure that you’re prepared….

Hearing a noise, Griphook glances warily around the room, placing one protective hand on his magical device—which is definitely not a cell phone.

GRIPHOOK (cont’d)
No, they’re not telling me what they’re looking for. As long as it isn’t goblin, I don’t give bupkis…. Yeah, right. That kid can’t occlude for beans. I could tell he was lying the whole time…. Oh, I fed him a line of crap about what a mensch he was for burying this elf. (laughing) I know, I know. Can you believe these—

There is a knock at the door.

GRIPHOOK (cont’d)
Hold on a minute….

He hurriedly stuffs the device into his pocket and settles back on the bed.

GRIPHOOK (cont’d)
(weakly)
Come in.

The door opens and BILL WEASLEY enters, holding a wine glass.

BILL
Are you all right? I noticed you slipped out.

GRIPHOOK
My—my legs were hurting. It was a wizard celebration. We goblins find it bad luck to celebrate before the bris.

Bill nods thoughtfully, as he moves closer. Then he holds out his hand expectantly.

GRIPHOOK
What are you…?

BILL
Hand it over, Griphook.

Griphook scowls and pulls the device out of his pocket. He places it on Bill’s palm. Bill puts it into his own pocket.

GRIPHOOK
That’s private property.

BILL
And this is my house. I’ll do whatever it takes to protect it.

He moves towards the door. Griphook raises himself up a bit.

GRIPHOOK
We goblins protect what is ours, too!

Bill turns to face him.

BILL
I know. But believe it or not, we’re all on the same side right now. Try to remember that.

He goes out the door, closing it quietly behind him. Griphook mutters defiantly as he settles back on the cushions.
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Date: 2009-10-27 09:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] t0ra-chan.livejournal.com
Ah, yes, more padding so we can have the final battle closer to the end of the school year. Or to make sure Teddy gets born beforehand. Either way it's pointless meandering. Because I still have no clue, what the heck the trio needed weeks to plan with Griphok. Especially when they actually get into Gringotts, they don't know anything. Did they know about the waterfall that washes away enchantments? The Clankers and the dragon? What kind of security measures could be in Bellatrix's vault? No, no and no.

As for Harry as Teddy's godfather, I absolutely hated how JKR put Sirius down in interviews in favor of Harry. And I don't even like Sirius.

Date: 2009-10-27 01:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] calenturian.livejournal.com
According to Griphook, the Sword originally belonged to Ragnuk the First, and was “taken” from him by Godric Gryffindor. Which could mean stolen, or it could mean that they dueled, or there was a war, or any number of things.

Hey, it could mean that Ragnuk wanted to get rid of it and Godric took it off his hands.

not that Harry has any special right to the Sword. Legally, it belongs to Hogwarts. Magically, it belongs to Ron

There must be a deleted scene where Harry disarms Ron!

and so the Trio and Griphook start planning their heist. It takes… big surprise… weeks of drawing diagrams and flow charts and to do lists.

Sadly, their study plan had two Octobers.

*wonders if anyone will get that ref*

There’s only one reason in the world why Lupin would name Harry as his son’s godfather. Because this book is about Harry.

Also, Harry has a lot of money. Lupin might not be betting on him to survive the battle.

But this bothered me too. If I wanted to be charitable to JKR I'd fanwank merrily along the lines of Lupin not having anyone left in the world, and seeing Harry as a link to both Sirius and James, and maybe drawing some sort of parallel with Teddy as the only other second-generation Marauder (assuming Peter didn't have any kids we don't know about), but quite honestly I can't think of much evidence to support it.

Teddy Ruxpin Lupin is born, along with a million more new fanfics.

I am shocked (shocked!) that I can find no fics starring James S. Potter, Esq. and Ted "Theodore" Lupin. Time-turners are canon! It almost writes itself!

Oh, and apparently Lupin will have sex with a woman.

But, you note, only a woman who can physically turn herself into a man.

Date: 2009-10-27 04:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tdotm.livejournal.com
--- “So, you thought you’d just skip into Hogwarts—where Voldemort was fresh and deadly, and had at least three Death Eaters for back-up and do… what, exactly? *Accio Dumbedore’s body*?”

Heh! Actually, I didn’t mind him trying to do the same in the Seven Potters – he was panicking and hardly had a repertoire of more useful spells to fall back on. It was sadly in character. I’d only have been furious if JKR had let it actually work. Here, however, I can just imagine his plan being to wait until the tomb was open, stalk up to Voldemort, say “What’s that behind you?!!!” followed by “Accio Elder Wand!”.Then he (and it would just be him, for Ron and Hermione’s ‘own good’ – though not for his) would grab it and run down to the Hogwart’s gates. He wouldn’t have a broom - he’d not dare to ask Bill if he could borrow one, because he's not allowed to know anything. Then he'd apparate away while Voldemort and co. were still staring in a confused fashion at the wall behind them. A plan worthy of James Bond himself - certainly of the calibre of the 'Operation Ministry' excellence we witnessed earlier. Shame Harry decided not to go with it....

--- “Might I remind you that Snape wiped your butt last time you dueled?”

I don't remember the scene in HBP, but didn’t *Draco* get the better of him? Otherwise, why did he need Sectumsempra? Couldn’t he find another way of avoiding the Crucio if he was in charge of the situation – or even in a position to dodge it?

--- “Hermione, meanwhile, has the words “We’re LYING!” written all over her face.”

If anyone deserves it, she does. B*tch. How on earth JKR has the brass nerve to continue making Hermione the moral compass in this story is beyond me.

--- “Snape! Where are you, Snape? Please come and rescue this story!”

How? By leaving a Snape shaped hole through JKR’s manuscript? Or by dying pointlessly in a puddle of his own blood? He got away with it for 6 whole books, but JKR caught up with him (and ruined him) good and proper in DH. Face it – we’re all alone and help isn’t coming.

--- “Here are the reasons against naming Harry: He’s seventeen. He’s the most wanted wizard in the country. He’s on a secret mission that may take years or decades and can’t be found most of the time. He has absolutely no experience with children. He can’t even take proper care of an owl. People around him die with alarming frequency. He’s impulsive and thoughtless. He’s seventeen.”

He’s a dick as well. Personally, if neither my wife and I had any friends, I’d have chosen Bill and Fleur, who are married and in a position to take care of a child if something happened to the grandparents, as well as being intelligent, capable and mature. Seventeen is too young for a lone godparent, even if he was super-efficient and not Voldemort’s Public Enemy number one.

--- “I like this scene. Bill is being smart.” (Plus the DVD extras)

Bill is the sensible eldest in a large family. He’s been a good friend to Harry and would do anything to keep his baby brother safe. He’s very clever without being unbearably smug, unlike some I could mention. He’s an expert at curse breaking, understands goblins and their kerazy ways, and has done work for them at Gringotts. He’s married another curse breaker who is also a mature elder child - and endless unwanted attention from men has probably made her wise beyond her years. This pair could be almost be a deus-ex-machina for a hero in Harry’s position – all the answers under the same roof. Except neither he nor JKR make any real use of them. Bill has to force his advice on him. Much as I like the dragon, it doesn’t help my lack of respect for Harry.

NEWSFLASH: The only reason Harry gets away with all this stuff is because JKR writes it that way, not because it makes any sense.

Date: 2009-10-27 06:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lissa2.livejournal.com
"And now Hermione is arguing with her about whether it was a Snorkacks or a Erumpent horn"
God Luna comes out kind of creepy in this scene with her denial. Did JKR make Hermione be right about that horn being dangerous as a compensation for her being wrong about the hallows?

"Luna reminds us that her father was working on a replica of the famous lost diadem of Ravenclaw"
And not surprisingly, Harry doesn't make the connection between that and the Ravenclaw relic he's looking for.
Lucky for him that Luna will later be at the RoR to remind him again about the diadem.

*Also, why the fuck didn't Ollivander make a wand for Dean? does he not like black people or what?

Date: 2009-10-27 06:12 pm (UTC)
ext_6866: (Cousins)
From: [identity profile] sistermagpie.livejournal.com
Bwahahaha! Harry thinking he's never chosen not to act before. And poor Ron having to desperately try to make it seem as if Harry's doing anything different than he'd done before. Does it really matter that they're spending a month talking about this instead of coming up with some desperately dumb plan to get into Hogwarts and then not know what to do once they got there?

Yeah, cause it's such an exciting possibility that Dumbledore might be alive. In this series where nobody's ever exactly dead anyway. Except Snape, because he's Slytherin and they have no souls.

LOL! Love the textbookspeak. In this book it might actually work.

The more time the Trio spends with Griphook, the less they like him. He’s bloodthirsty, he enjoys the thought of pain for wizards and lesser creatures (so… why was he so impressed about Harry burying Dobby?), and he insists on kosher food.

So pretty much exactly like wizards, except for the Kosher food.

I'm surprised Lupin didn't die of humiliation in this chapter long before the final battle.

Godmothers? Who cares about them? Women are just there to protect their children mother-bear style when the need arouses. Godfathering implies teaching moral development or some such. Not sure exactly what since none of these people is religious.

*offers sympathy on writing work for hire. Royalties rule!!* And yeah, I love that Wizards always have to make it seem like their concepts are so hard to understand when Muggles have always already got a word for it and easily understand it.

Oh, and apparently Lupin will have sex with a woman.

Nah, she was clearly in the form of Sirius at the time.

Date: 2009-10-27 06:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eir-de-scania.livejournal.com

"Oh, and apparently Lupin will have sex with a woman.
Nah, she was clearly in the form of Sirius at the time."

***Poor Jo, she never should have played along with the S/R shippers in OotP.

Still, there is *no* chemistry between Remus and Tonks. Probably because our Jo can't write romance. Or in the case of R/T didn't even try.

Date: 2009-10-27 07:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eir-de-scania.livejournal.com
JKR should have had Harry stay at Hogwarts for the last year as well. Some situation like the Umbridge rule, with heavily cencored contact with the outside, and perhaps Harry being forced to hide in the RoR just before Easter. That would give him a good reason to try to do everything on his own, as he didn't want to put other students in danger.

Now he's surrounded with older, more experienced witches and wizards wanting nothing more than helping him. Not doing so just make him seem totally daft.

Date: 2009-10-27 07:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] the-bitter-word.livejournal.com
I did a Google search on "remus kissed harry" and, yes, there is Harry/Lupin fic (often with a side of Snape or Black).

My question is, what do you call it? Some possibilities:

Pupin
Lotter
Rotter
Harpin
Harmus
Remarry
Repotter
Potpin
HarryLu
Luhar
Potmus

Still headdesking during the summaries and enjoying the extras.

ETA: It's called "Moonstruck."
Edited Date: 2009-10-27 07:55 pm (UTC)

Date: 2009-10-27 08:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] artystone.livejournal.com
He’s the most wanted wizard in the country. He’s on a secret mission that may take years or decades and can’t be found most of the time. He has absolutely no experience with children. He can’t even take proper care of an owl. People around him die with alarming frequency. He’s impulsive and thoughtless. He’s seventeen.
There was an hilarious thrread on HP4GU years back about what a horrible choice of godfather was Sirius Black. We had all sorts of visions of him strapping baby Harry to the back of his flying motorcycle and making him sleep in a crib with scary clown sheets....

Date: 2009-10-27 10:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tevye-cat.livejournal.com
To think of all the time I spent reading this book hoping Snape would show up to rescue the story. Seriously, wasn't Harry more obsessed with defeating Snape than Voldemort at the end of HBP? Where did that confrontation go? Or what about the Malfoys, could we at least have them please? Draco had growth the last book, remember that, JKR? Harry was empathizing with him, remember? But nope, everyone please regress to one-dimensional cardboard cut-outs for Deathly Hallows, because that is apparently the Master Plan.

On the bright side, you have given me the image of a teenage, drama club geek Lupin.

Date: 2009-10-27 11:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eir-de-scania.livejournal.com
Our Jo is overfond of telling-not-showing, isn't she?

If course, the more convinced Snapettes and Dracoites skipped over even the comments there were in the books... :-P

Date: 2009-10-27 11:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eir-de-scania.livejournal.com
Of course they do. I've seen summaries. As well as James jr/Teddy. Any pairing you can think of exists somewhere, even including the Giant Squid, I'm afraid.

Date: 2009-10-27 11:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eir-de-scania.livejournal.com
"Hearing a noise, Griphook glances warily around the room, placing one protective hand on his magical device—which is definitely not a cell phone."

Correct. It's called a "mobile".

Date: 2009-10-27 11:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eir-de-scania.livejournal.com
We never see post-Hogwarts, pre-Azkaban Sirius, though. Like James, I guess he grew up. I know of several jerk-ass sixteen-y-o boys who were nice mature young men at twenty.

Date: 2009-10-28 01:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mmmarcusz.livejournal.com
Lily gave up her friends when she got married.

Date: 2009-10-28 01:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mary-j-59.livejournal.com
Just a brief comment. I was so irked by the Lupin melodrama (really - can no one in this book speak colloquial English?) that I remembered nothing else of this chapter.

But yes - why must Harry fail to take all the good help that is around him? Well, you said this before, about the Ministry break-in, but it's just as true here. Bill is smart and sane and works with goblins, so why doesn't Harry make better use of that?

As always, I like your DVD extras.
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